At different times:
I wasn’t sure how come adults always knew better but apparently they did (every adult said so),
I wondered whether that wisdom was supposed to accrue with age or you somehow got it bestowed upon when you became a legal adult, and if so what the procedure was and did it hurt (Spain’s legal adult age was being lowered),
and I decided grown-ups were all morons. I’m still of this school of thought, which is why I refuse to be a grown-up.
I mentioned this just a few days ago on another thread here! It was explained to us that in this context, an alien was somebody who had permission to live in the U.S. but was not an American citizen. That, we were generally able to understand.
When I was a kid, my mother was in a women’s bowling league that met during the daytime. During school breaks, when their kids were home, a lot of the moms would bring their kids along with them to the bowling alley, where we’d hang out, and try not to get into trouble.
The bowling alley had a bar. There was a sign above the doorway to the bar, stating, “Minors Not Allowed.” I was probably 6 or so, and already a precocious reader, but I didn’t realize that “minor” and “miner” were two different words. I didn’t realize that we had miners in suburban Chicago (and I was mentally picturing old-timey gold prospectors), nor did I understand why a bar wouldn’t let them in. 
Well, the gold dust gets everywhere…
I confessed to my wife that as a wee one, I thought dogs were girls and cats were boys. I tried to explain, “See, our dog was female, so I just used ‘she’ for all dogs, and my best friend’s cat was male…” She stared at me like I was insane.
I was confused when someone would say “break a dollar” (make change). How the heck do you break a piece of paper?
I remember pestering my parents during car trips incessantly, asking them if we were “in the country.” I meant were we in a place where there were farms & horses & cows. They thought I meant “are we still in the USA.” It took a while before we each figured out what the other meant.
When I was very young we had a neighbor who would come over and talk with my mom over coffee, which they’d fortify with liquor. The woman always wore big Jackie O sunglasses and when she’d take them off she always had black eyes. My mom always explained that she fell down the steps, ran into a door, was in a car accident, etc.
I wanted so badly to explain to the woman that she would get hurt less often if she wasn’t always wearing dark glasses. I honestly thought the grownups didn’t realize this.
That is tragic. Black eyes, multiple times and lies to protect the abuser? I would hope that is almost impossible to go on today but I’m sure there are exceptions.
We had a couch which was short for choucherfield. Frozen peas had to be unthawed.
You were right to be confused. I gave a bad opinion in another thread about the same kind of situation and have regretted it ever since.
Your dad should have said clockwise or anticlockwise.
This STILL confuses me!
Or as we say on this side of the pond, “clockwise and counterclockwise.” That’s what I say now, too. I have major issues with right and left and use any means to sidestep them.
From that link:
So you pick up the nubby mat from the bar and drain all the splash-overs into a glass and *drink *it?? Ewww. Drunk people will do anything, won’t they?
LOVING this thread, BTW.
I’m not sure if that would have helped. I still remember riding in a car with my parents and one of them said “at the bottom of the hill, turn left”, and for a while after that whenever I needed to know left and right I’d visualize travelling down that hill. At the time of the Great Faucet Confusion, I don’t know if “clockwise” or “counterclockwise” would have meant anything to me. I just learned that “left” or “right” meant the top of the faucet. As an adult, that’s obvious; but nothing’s obvious when you learn it for the first time.
I think I’ve told this one before in a different thread, but…
one of those things kids see/hear on TV but don’t fully understand- this was in the '80s when cholesterol was basically considered to be on the level of a mass-murderer, so companies advertised their cooking oils as “low/no cholesterol.”
usually when we made popcorn at home, we did it stove-top with a bit of oil in a pot. One night at my aunt’s house, she said she was going to make popcorn. She had an air popcorn maker (which I’d never seen before) and as she dumped in the kernels and turned it on I asked why she wasn’t using “cholesterol oil.”
In a rather incredulous tone she looked at me and said “CHOLESTEROL OIL?!?”
I know a woman who cannot do left/right. If she is driving and is told to “turn left” she holds her hands out in front of her like she is pushing something and traces the “L” her left fingers-thumb form. Then she knows that is left.
Seriously.
When I was a kid, I wondered whey there were a lot of roads named Frontage. I thought little people lived in traffic light poles and manually switched the lights from red to green. I still say I have to worm my horse. Not give her worms, but give her a medicine that kills the worms. Should be de-worm.
This is very sweet!
As both kid and adult I’ve wondered if dogs have names for one another. Does Tally call Baxter “Baxter” or “Woofghuxi” in her mind and pup language?
I once thought that babies were born through the navel. Made perfect sense to me.
But one thing that happened to me, I still recall. I don’t know how old I was, maybe 5 or 6 the first time my mother took me on an elevator. We walked into a building, walked into a small room, the door closed, a bit of time passed, the door opened and we were in an entirely different place. Like some kind of teleportation. Of course I didn’t know that word or concept, I was utterly mystified. I caught on quickly enough, of course, but I still recall that feeling of utter weirdness.
Tally probably thinks of Baxter as “dog whose butt smells like this”.
The dog across the street is “dog whose butt smells like that”.
I had visions of Superman, Supergirl, and the Martian Manhunter all standing in line to register.
About fifteen percent of the population suffers from profound left-right confusion. It was a great relief to find out that I wasn’t just being an idiot, or if I was that I was an idiot in good company.
(For further fun I have one of the other conditions mentioned in the article, prosopagnosia. Apparently I should never become a doctor).
The first day of class in first grade, our teacher told us one of the class rules was “keep your hands to yourself”. I had no idea what she meant by this. My hands are attached to me – how could I not keep them to myself? I thought perhaps I had misunderstood her and she actually said keep your pants to yourself, although that was only slightly more plausible to me.