Exclusive! How to stop the forest fires!

The following advertisement is from today’s Guardian (UK newspaper). I make no comments, other than to stress that the capital letters are hers, not mine.

TO PRESIDENT CLINTON & THE US GOVERNMENT

**URGENT NEWSFLASH TO PRESIDENT CLINTON & THE AMERICAN GOVERNMENT AUGUST 2000

A Religious Clairvoyant’s Instructions Guaranteeing heavy rains on US forest fires in 48 or 24 Hours**

RELIGIOUS PSYCHIC MYSTIC IN LONDON WENT TO THE AMERICAN AMBASSADOR’S RESIDENCE IN REGENTS PARK WITH LETTERS EXPLAINING HOW TO BRING ABOUT HEAVY RAINS TO FALL ON THE FOREST FIRES IN THE USA! VERY QUICKLY IN 24 HOURS! THE RELIGIOUS SISTER WROTE, THAT IF THE ELEVEN STATES OBEY HER INSTRUCTIONS, THEN RAINS WILL PUT OUT A MAJORITY OF THE FIRST IN LESS THAN 48 HOURS. FIRST OF ALL, THE ELEVEN AFFECTED STATES MUST ORDER ALL THEIR MAIN TELEVISION NETWORKS TO SHOW FILMS OF HEAVY SHOWERS, NON STOP, FOR 24 HOURS. CONSTANT TELEVISION IMAGES OF HEAVY RAIN WILL HELP MILLIONS OF PEOPLE TO GENERATE POWERFUL, MENTAL VISUALISATION OF HEAVY DOWNPOURS. THIS TELEVISION FOOTAGE COUPLED WITH PEOPLES VISUALISATION, WILL ‘MAGNETISE’ REAL RAINS, AND HEAVY DOWNPOURS UPON THE FOREST FIRES WITHIN 48 HOURS. HOWEVER UNUSUAL OR BIZZARE THIS METHOD MAY APPEAR, IT WILL WORK VERY QUICKLY, IF CARRIED OUT TODAY. ALL TELEVISION NETWORKS ARE TO SHOW FILMS OF HEAVY RAINS FOR 24 HOURS, MILLIONS OF PEOPLE WILL DEVELOP MIND POWER THROUGH INTENSE VISUALISATION, WHICH WILL RESULT IN HEAVY RAIN POURING DOWN ON THE FOREST FIRES IN THE ELEVEN AFFECTED STATES. IT IS THE DUTY AND THE OBLIGATION OF THE US GOVERNMENT TO TRY EVERY POSSIBLE METHOD TO EXTINGUISH THESE FIRES AS SOON AS POSSIBLE!

IF THE US FOLLOWS THIS RELIGIOUS SISTER’S INSTRUCTIONS IT WILL HAVE HEAVY RAINS WITHIN 48 HOURS, UPON THE AFFECTED AREAS. VISUALISATION OF HEAVY RAIN ASSISTED BY THE MEDIUM OF TELEVISION IMAGES OF RAIN, WILL PRODUCE AWESOMELY POWERFUL FORCES. PEOPLE WHO ARE RELIGIOUS, SHOULD COMBINE THEIR VISUALISATION WITH CONSTANT PRAYERS FOR RAIN, AS THEY WATCH THE TELEVISED IMAGES OF HEAVY RAINS. IF THESE INSTRUCTIONS ARE COMPLIED WITH HEAVY SHOWERS WILL PUT OUT THESE FIRES WITH EXTRAORDINARY SPEED.

IMPORTANT

SEVEN YEARS AGO AUSTRALIAN TELEVISION NEWS FILMED THIS RELIGIOUS PSYCHIC’S METHOD WITH THE RESULT THAT VERY HEAVY RAINS POURED ON THE BUSH FIRES WITHIN 24 HOURS!

OH GOD WE PRAY, SEND HEAVY RAINS WITHOUT DELAY ON THE FORESTS OF THE USA.

huh, and all the posters always told me that only I could prevent forest fires.

I think you made Silent-bob go speechless

I am going to spread all my cash out on the nightstand, video tape it and watch it over and over and over…

That’s nothin’. Ya gotta see if you can astound him enough to make him speak.