Seriously? I had a phase when I was a kid of having really bad nosebleeds, and eventually got referred to a hospital to sort it out. I heard the word “cauterised” and imagined that I was going to get a flaming brand shoved up my beak. I was terrified. As it turned out, it was just a dab of silver oxide (or something) into my nasal cavity, done by a really nice friendly doctor. Mind you, the metal thing that he used to hold my nostril wide open was pretty unpleasant.
It may have been the best thing he ever did, but I bet it wasn’t the easiest.
Word.
I can’t think of anything that comes close.
Most things, even the painful things, end up LESS bad than I imagine.
Gave birth twice, at home, no drugs…ehhh. Intense but I’ve had broken toes and food poisoning that hurt worse.
I’m with ya, brutha. The doc said to me, “just to let you know, there is a nerve that runs near where we give the injection, and once in a while, we hit that nerve.”
Did he hit that nerve? Yes, indeed, he hit that nerve.
And then they pulled me from the ceiling.
mmm
Xmas dinner at the inlaws. Its the same thing every year. Verbatim. It’s like being trapped in a rerun. I cannot stand it and it causes my depression to flare up earlier and earlier every year. I don’t have family of my own (that I want to hang out with/that are left and not severely depressed.) so I am fucking screwed.
“You’ll feel a sting”???
Sting, my ass!!! Lying BASTARD. Those shots hurt like a MOTHERFUCK. My MO when getting one of them is to grab the armrests on the chair with a death grip, go completely rigid, and chant. But no namby pamby “om mane padme hum” or “na myo ho ren ge kyo” for me, nosirree!
Shiiiiitshitshitshitshitshit
Shiiiiiiitshitshitshitshitshit
Shiiiiitshitshitshitshitshit
And yeah as another poster said - they can hit a nerve. I’ve never had that happen with a plantar injection, but I’ve had shots into an area near a nerve (to treat a Morton’s neuroma in the foot) and they’re trying to get to or at least near the nerve for that one. One time I was absolutely convinced he’d taken a needle and stabbed the far end of one of my toes - some inches from the actual injection but apparently he got the nerve, and that’s what the nerve thought was happening.
Must be a guy thing. I’ve had a pelvic exam that involved palpating the organs down there to look for abnormalities, that once involved one finger in the vagina, one in the rectum, and pushing down on the pelvis in various spots with her other hand to feel for any problems in there. The pushing-down part was far and away the worst part of that.
Experiencing a hurricane used to seem like something exciting when I was a kid. Then Hurricane Andrew came through south Louisiana in 1992, shortly after leveling Homestead, Florida. We only caught the eastern half of the storm in Baton Rouge, but I lay awake in my apartment, listening the howling wind and the sound of transformers exploding and I was too frightened to breathe.
Breaking my wrist in several places was pretty horrible, too. My only experience with breaking a bone prior to that was a clean and simple ankle fracture when I was eight years old. Thankfully, my wrist was easily repaired in surgery, but the recovery sucked.
Having to have a pet euthanized. It’s been over two years and I still can’t talk about that experience without crying. I found myself sobbing during “The Walking Dead” premiere because the scene where the main character puts down the torso zombie reminded me of this.
Sounds shocking!
The Year (really 18 months or so) of Pain, around '95 or so. Passed my first kidney stone, took more than three months. Every few days it would shift a bit, and that was the cue for 8-12 hours or more of mind-bending, wall-pounding agony. Soon afterward, impacted wisdom teeth flared up; had those taken out, apparently by cold chisel, resulting in about three weeks where I wished I could detach my swollen, throbbing jaw and toss it out the window. I was picking shards of tooth out of the back of my mouth for literally months afterward. Couple more kidney stones, only took a month or so each to pass. Finally, an episode of gout; mind-boggling how tiny little crystals of something in one’s capillaries could be so excruciating.
That was pretty much the revelation to me that if there were such a thing as intelligent design, then the designer was a complete asshole.
Going to a cheap place to get a nose piercing. It was the first real body mod I’d ever had (other than earrings, which don’t count as body mods in the piercing subculture). Yeah it only cost like $25 to have it done (including jewelry). However, the guy doing it made fun of me because my eyes watered… you’re piercing tear ducts, bra! Does this not happen every single time? I wasn’t even crying! It was an involuntary response!
Fuck you, piercing dude. Fuck you in the anus with a feeldoe.
Had the same thing done for nasal polyps . Holy Christ, that was misery on a stick. I nearly fainted twice while they pulled the gauze out of my first nostril. And then they had to do the second one…
New shoes. I’d gotten new dress shoes for a business trip to Seattle, and they weren’t broken in. I got a blister on my big toe, that was making me limp while I was at the place I’d gone to visit. They offered a visit with their on-site nurse, but I manfully thought it was no big deal.
OMG. It got infected, apparently while I was waiting to board my flight back to St. Louis. Felt like the inside of that shoe had been lined with razor blades and knives. By the time we reached Salt Lake City for me to change planes, my sock was wet up to the ankles – my shoe had filled up with pus and blood.
Once off the plane, I took off the shoe to inspect matters. My toe was purple, and swollen to twice its size. I couldn’t fit the shoe back on. So I got to limp my way across the airport to my connection, in socks, leaving wet pus-stain footprints. Like the Little Mermaid, where she gets to walk feeling like she’s stepping on knives. And, too late at night, so no carts available.
On the flight home, it started to really hurt. The stewardesses sympathetically brought me some absorbant towels and a plastic bag to avoid pus pooling. Another agonizing limp through the St. Louis airport. And couldn’t see the doctor until the next morning… by which time the toenail had popped off. Just waiting for the doctor with the hideous toe uncovered left a pool of pus underneath my foot.
I never imagined a little blister from tight shoes could lead to zombie toe. ick.
Having the screw removed from my knee under local anesthesia. You see, I’d had MCL reconstructive surgery about a year prevously, and the after-effects of the general anesthesia were almost as bad as the after-effects of the surgery, so I wanted to avoid it again if I could.
So I asked the doctor if I could get a local. He said “Sure, but it’ll hurt pretty bad.” I said “I’m tough.”
The things I didn’t realize at 18 years old were:
a) the screw wasn’t 3/4" long, but rather 3.25" long. It almost stuck out the far side of the wide part of the femur.
b) the local anesthetic doesn’t do a damn thing for bone. It just basically numbed the skin so that I couldn’t feel the incision or sutures.
That hurt… a lot. I remember it quite clearly despite being sedated at the time, and it being 20 years ago.
Life
Pregnancy.
I never felt good, glowing, energized, or all those other wonderful things people tell you about. I only felt achy, tired, hot, bleah. Sure I was happy to be having a baby, but being pregnant was way worse than I thought it would be. I would have gone through twice as much labor while having a migraine, if I could have skipped the second half of my pregnancy.
I had a growth on my tongue removed to be checked for cancer. The doctor needed to numb my tongue before cutting. How did he do that? A huge ass needle jabbed into my tongue several times. So painful and awful then the medication kicked in. My tongue had to be stitched up after excision. I didn’t feel anything at the time, it was just weird seeing this thick black thread being looped into my mouth under my nose. Once I got home and the medication wore off, oh my goodness. It felt like needles jabbing into my tongue for days.
On the flip side, I got two fillings done with no Novocaine. I have weird nerves and it is always a chore to get me numb. I had a new dentist who tried everything and nothing happened. Since it was a work day, I told him to just go ahead and get it over with. The pain was absolutely excruciating but somehow I was able to make it through with breathing exercises. The hygienist saw every hit nerve ending and at the end the dentist said, “So I guess you got numb finally, huh?” I’m kinda psyched that I could handle that level of pain. Childbirth will be a breeze, right?
I’m not game to do a Google or Urban Dictionary search on what that particular activity is, so would someone be kind enough to provide a “polite” translation? It sounds like a vigorous blowjob but clearly it’s not…
Labour was a shit show for me. I had to be induced and was in hospital fo three days as the were throwing everything they had at trying to get labour to start.
I had taken child birth classes and really thought I would be ok with just narcotics - no epidural. However, in the classes they tell you you’ll have a contraction, which will suck, followed by a minute or two to recover. What the don’t tell you is if you’re induced you get all the contractions and suckyness with NO BREAK to recover. Just one long never ending contraction. I was climbing the walls - it was not pretty.
Then I wound up with a c section anyway and the recovery from that was terrible too, although that’s because I had no help, whatsover. That would have been ok except my inlaws kept saying if I needed help with anything to just ask so I kept asking if they could walk the dog and they would say they would and thn just not show up.