Extend "Knocking on Heaven's Door"

Yeah, it’s hubrissy all to hell, but given that Dylan’s “Knocking on Heaven’s Door” is one of the ten or twenty greatest songs ever written, it always feels like a bad radio edit, ending after two small verses.

Everyone from Dylan down to the local lounge singer has messed with the lyrics over the years, so let’s play. Either quote your favorite variant verse and note who and when, or share a verse or two you always thought was good enough.

Both mine, hummed over the years:
Mama, stand my boots upon my grave
I won’t be walkin’ any more
Looks like my journey’s at an end
I feel I’m knockin’ on heaven’s door

Mama, take back your heart from me
Mine can no longer hear its roar
The silence has spread throughout my veins
I feel I’m knockin’ on heaven’s door
Polite critique of all verses, Doper and other, welcome - is it a verse Bobby D might have penned, in the day?

They are too stilted for me. Too many passive constructions and backwards things. I think it should be more conversational. But that’s me, we are not in the same universe: KOHD is not even in my top 100 Dylan songs.

Didn’t the song rhyme?

Mama take this hat from me
It don’t fit me anymore
My heads a-hangin’ don’t you see
I Feel I’m knockin’ on heaven’s door.

Carve my name upon my stone
I won’t be writin’ home no more
I’ve got no stories left to tell
I feel I’m knockin’ on Heaven’s door

Lay a rose upon my grave
I can’t pick flowers anymore
I’ve run out of love to give
I feel I’m knockin’ on Heaven’s door

Dress me up in white linens
I won’t be dancing anymore
I’ve been laid low in my prime
I feel I’m knockin’ on Heaven’s door

Get six young girls to haul my casket
I won’t be flirting anymore
Pills of white mercury have failed me
I feel I’m knockin’ on Heaven’s door

Let me go, let me go, God bless me
I won’t be wandering anymore
I’ve never met a soul like you
I feel I’m knockin’ on Heaven’s door

Beat upon your drum slowly
I can’t play that fiddle anymore
The last dance is finished
I feel I’m knockin’ on Heaven’s door

(Inspired by the "Streets of Laredo/St. James Infirmary/Unfortunate Rake folk tradition)