Eye surgery jokes / music needed!

[Mama_Zappa]

Going in for cataract surgery a week from tomorrow, finally!! (now-fired doc kept putting it off for no good reason, finally went to someone else).

And as always when I’m terrified, I like to have a few topical jokes handy - distracts ME, if nothing else.

I could reuse one colonoscopy joke but any others would be appreciated (especially as I’m having the other one done 4 weeks later).

And music to listen to on my iPod beforehand… or if the drugs are good enough, to “sing” afterward. A couple of obvious ones would be
I Can See Clearly Now
Blinded by the Light

[ioioio]

Doctor My Eyes (Jackson Browne)

[running_coach]

Blue Eyes-Elton John
Hungry Eyes-Eric Carmen
Blue Eyes Crying In The Rain-Willie Nelson
Private Eyes-Hall and Oates

[running_coach]

She Blinded Me With Science-Thomas Dolby
The First Cut Is The Deepest-Sheryl Crow
Blinded By The Light-Manfred Mann
I’m Looking Through You-The Beatles

[cmkeller]

Pink Cataract by Bruce Springsteen

[Biotop]

Wishing you the luck of the Iris!

[Chefguy]

No need to be terrified. My wife just had hers done. The surgery itself is about 10 minutes. They had her on I-don’t-care IV, and everything was numb. She’s thrilled with her new outlook on life.

[Defensive_Indifference]

I Only Have Eyes for You, by the Flamingos
Behind Blue Eyes by The Who
Windy (“Windy Has Stormy Eyes”) by the Association

[blondebear]

Open My Eyes
Ebony Eyes

[Defensive_Indifference]

Are your eyes angry?
Angry Eyes

[kenobi_65]

Any song by Donnie Iris (such as “Ah! Leah!”) would be appropriate.

[kenobi_65]

Also:

Suite: Judy Blue Eyes, by Crosby, Stills and Nash

[FoieGrasIsEvil]

“Brain Stew” by Green Day. Oh, you know!

“My eyes feel like they’re gonna bleed…”

Seriously though, good luck on your surgery!

[kayaker]

Van Morrison, Brown Eyed Girl.

[Turble]

Oh, great. My cataract surgery is in four hours and the earworm has already started. I can see clearly now …

[Thudlow_Boink]

There’s the national anthem (“O say, can you see?”), but then you’d have to stand up.

[jerseymule]

What A Wonderful World by Louis Armstrong:
“I see trees of green, red roses too” and a whole lot more.

[Peter_Morris]

Everybody Say Eye.
Are these jokes bad enough, or do you need them cornier?

[WOOKINPANUB]

Eye in the Sky is a pretty and pretty mellow song.

Bette Davis Eyes is pretty jiggy (though I hope you don’t end up with BD eyes ).

Very best of luck, and tell us how you do when* [del] the pus clears up and the dizzy spells go away [/del] you’re feeling up to it.

• COMPLETELY KIDDING. I know many people who have had it done and all, bar none, have said it’s a snap.

[enipla]

Hey Mama. Glad you’re moving forward with this. We discussed this a lot in my thread about my surgery.

It IS very fast and pain free. It is the most common surgery in the USA. They have got it figured out.