How is the guy who outed Tinky-Winky a “fag enabler?”
I think this is lovely. I hope to see some of the picketing (I am sure Fox News will cover the funeral, eh?)
But, I am thinking something good can possibly come out of this. So, all of Falwell’s people are at the funeral and they see the Phelps clan. They think-“wow these people are insane!!! Anybody who holds the same beliefs as they do must also be insane!!! OH NO!!! I hold these beliefs!!! I MUST CHANGE!!!”
And then they go out and hire a gay hooker.
No, but really, this might cause the ex-Moral Majority-ers to look at themselves a bit closer and re-evaluate their belief systems.
Maybe??
God’s obviously pissed that an elderly hetero guy took a tornado death slot away from a flaming young homo. Duh.
(P.S. - hey Fred, you ever notice how there are never any big tornadoes in San Francisco? Do you really think that God would purposely unleash the first F-5 (or EF-5) tornado in EIGHT YEARS on Kansas when there are much higher concentrations of gays elsewhere? Come on, dude. Give Him more credit than that.)
(P.P.S.: rest in peace, Harold Schmidt.)
Guys, Fred Phelp’s church is him, his children, and his grandchildren. It is very much a cult centered completely around Phelp’s personal vision.
These pickets aren’t just random pointless hatefulness, they serve a purpose.
What if people in Phelp’s cult could develop friendships with people in other churches? What if members of Phelp’s cult could walk down the street without people (metaphorically) spitting on them? These pickets are done so that everyone in the church is completely isolated from the outside world. EVERYONE hates Westboro Baptist Church, there is literally not a single other church in the entire world that regards them as anything other than nutters, and vice-versa.
It wouldn’t matter how fervently someone in another church hated fags, they would still be denounced as Satanic by Fred Phelps, because thats how he maintains control over his cult. The cult members are told to carry out these hateful pickets, not merely for hate’s sake (although Phelps is a sadist who really does enjoy it), but to encourage the rest of the world to hate the picketers, because that’s how Phelps wants it, he wants them to feel that they don’t have a friend in the world outside his church.
Bottom line, Phelps isn’t just another ultra-rightwing crazy preacher, he’s not just a more extreme version of Falwell or Pat Roberson, he’s on a whole different planet.
The wikipedia entry on the church is pretty good:
Also see this one hour documentary on the Church, “The Most Hated Family in America”:
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-4413388146858417528
According to Phelps, “Falwell cut a deal with his fag preacher bud, Mel White On Oct. 24, 1999, at his Thomas Road Church, Lynchburg, Va.”
He enabled the fags by alerting them to a gay icon nobody knew was gay until he pointed it out?
In Soviet Russia, fag enables YOU!
Falwell and members of his congregation had a meeting with Soulforce (Mel White’s gay Christian group) the weekend of October 22-24th, 1999, culminating in church services held on October 24th. Here’s an account of the weekend:
[Creepy Old Lady from Crocodile Dundee]
Maybe I better go there someday.
[/CRLfCD]
The red menace just got a little more pink.
If an asteroid were to hit that funeral, obliterating everyone within a five mile radius, I would so rush my atheist ass to church, causing heads to spin for several square blocks.
Well, except for the heads that would simply explode.
And I’m a little pissed that Phred the Phucker is gonna picket certain high school commencement ceremonies, but won’t be at the graduation for my district. C’mon, Phred, what do I hafta do to bring down your laughable wrath? I already know and hang out with more gays than straights, our high school has a GLBT society, and I’ve called a friend so that there is gay sex happening in the district even as I type. Bring it, ya phucking pissant.
Hasn’t he not been showing up for most of his threatened picketing raids lately?
I just worry that Phelps picketing Falwell’s funeral is going to disturb the fabric of existence, creating some sort of a black hole of absurdity, and the universe will disappear up its own ass.
…prompting me to yell, as I disappeared into the up-ass void…WHO’S THE FAG ENABLER NOW, PHELPS?!? YOU JUST TURNED THE WHOLE UNIVERSE INTO A BUNCH OF ASS SPELUNKERS!!!
Wow. Battle of the fundies. This has pay-per-view potential.
You’re an amazingly thick pustule of dickhattery, FriarTed, and don’t you let anyone ever tell you any different.
Picketing funerals is the LEAST of Fred’s crimes. Observe.
Hell, this is the guy who picketed Fred Rogers’s funeral. Mister fucking Rogers. He’s used that goddamned shark for a trampoline by now.
Same as those Amish schoolgirls, Virginia Tech students, and U.S. GIs killed in Iraq: He was an American. Since America tolerates flaming faggotry and wicked buggery and wanton homoschlurpenschlongery, we are a sinful nation and God periodically punishes us for it and it is Phelps’ holy duty to call public attention to that at every high-profile funeral.
Any more questions?
Does anyone else picture a “fag enabler” as some kind of robot? I’m thinking of one of those old-school robots with wheels and a bulbous glass head and flailing arms with hooks on the end. It’s called the “FAGOMATIX 2000” and its job is to patrol the streets for deactivated fags.
beep beep
“FAG DETECTED. DETERMINING STATUS.”
“FAG CURRENTLY DISABLED. APPROACHING.”
“DISABLED FAG IN RANGE. ENABLING…”
click**whirr beep woof clunk honk rowr
“FAG ENABLED.”
“Oh thank you kind robot! I’ve been standing there for days waiting for somebody to enable me! Finally, I can get back to buying shoes and worshipping Satan!”
I want to be a Fag Enabler! Where do I sign up?