FarrisGoldstein, get in here, you ignorant piece of shit

Strange supporters? Is that like a jock strap with barbed wire in it?

Ohhh I like that. Mind if I steal it for a sig?


Well I have a cat named Chainsaw and he…

I have a cat named Tiddles who flies across the room and lands in a bucket of water… :wink:

(“Er, no - I fling her.”)


QUOTE]*Originally posted by Coldfire *

The topic at hand does not fall into that category. As Farris himself stated, there IS such a thing as Animal Behavioral Psychology. And to my knowledge, this science has yet to come up with proof of any animal understanding any human language on a level that exceeds contitional behaviour (i.e. you can teach a dog to “sit!” because you reward him for doing so, not because he understands the word itself).


Not that I want get slammed, but what about gorillas that use sign language? There’s documentation of Koko, a gorilla who used sign language with a vocabulary of 500 words, and seemed to understand spoken english?

Cats are not gorrillas. Gorrillas are very closely related to man, cats are NOT.

Have they found a cat who can sign?
Didnt think so.
Listen, I love my cat, but I harbor no illusions… he knows what I am saying only by the tone of my voice.
For example: if I call him for a treat, he comes running… I could use the same voice and call him a dirty skunk, and he would still come running.

If I bark out a gruff “Murphy!!” he runs… but he would run even if I gruffly yelled “Doofus!!”

Cats have a tiny little brain, they eat, poop and clean themselves…when they think of it, they suck up to keep us feeding them. Thats it.

I agree with your point. However, my post concerned only this statement by Coldfire.>>>>>>>>>>
And to my knowledge, this science has yet to come up with proof of any animal understanding any human language on a level that exceeds contitional behaviour (i.e. you can teach a dog to “sit!” because you reward him for doing so, not because he understands the word itself.<<<<<<<<<<<<<

Koko was an animal understaning a human language (asl). But alas, poor Koko is deceased.

She wasn’t the only gorilla using ASL. There are a few others.

While I am not doubting gorrillas’ ability to use and comprehend sign language, at least to an extent, have you ever seen the transcript of the AOL chat that they did with Koko? People would type a question or comment, an interpreter would sign to her, then type her reply back in. It’s hilarious…the interpreters practically make things up… “well, she’s looking out the window now. She’s lookling…at the birds! yes, that’s it; she likes birds! And birds fly; she wants to fly!”

Of ocurse, I’m remember the questions being far outside the realm of a gorilla’s experience, but it was amusing to see just how much they tried to fudge it.

My sister has an African Gray parrot that has a larger vocabulary than most of the men I have dated. Some of the things she says (the bird, not my sister) are:

“Where ya goin? Where ya goin?” She only says this when you are getting ready to leave the house.

When you respond to her (it doesn’t matter what you say) she will say “Zena go? Zena go”?

(Note: Zena Princess Warrior is a STUPID name for a bird. Blame my brother-in-law.)

She will call the dogs when she hears them outside barking to come in.

Probably the funniest of all is when the phone rings and she hollars my teenage niece’s name “NI-COOOOLE? NI-COOOOOLE?” over and over and over until my niece says “WHAT?!?!?!” Zena will then say “Phone!”.

She says a whole bunch of other phrases that seem to fit the circumstances. It’s kind of weird.

Nanook of the North Shore: Feel free to take it as a sig line. I stole it from a cartoon that actually used dogs, but it was funny so…

Today’s cartoon in Gary Larson’s Far Side daily calendar:

What we say to dogs: Okay Ginger! I’ve had it! You stay out of the garbage! Understand, Ginger! Stay out of the garbage or else!

What they hear: blah blah GINGERblah blah blah blah blah blah blah GINGER blah blah blah blah …

My neighbour has a cat called Garfield. He spends every evening trying to get it back into the house, using bribery, threats, appeals to reason, logic, sarcasm and tearful fits. It still takes him about two hours.

He’s doing it right now. I should sell tickets.

Spot on about Koko. I believe there are a few other gorrillas out there that have been taught sign language.

So, yeah, some very smart animals that almost fit our DNA completely are able to communicate with us. Cats, however, aren’t, at least not on any linguistic level.

So, anyone seen Farris?

Or is it FarrisGoldsteins Day Off?

Heh heh heh. Maybe his cat talked him out of responding.

Diane, just be happy it doesn’t muzzle up to the bars and “VOOM”…

Well, I have three cats. I don’t talk to them but they talk to me. They want me to (dramatic pause) DO things. It’s really creepy and I don’t know where to turn for help. The really weird thing is they speak to me in Latin. :wink:

I have a hard time believing this too. I understand that some people are very close to their animals but you can’t actually sit and chat with your pets.

Now, they can understand certain things. Like when I rattle the cat treat can; they know what that sound means and they come running. But it’s like Pavlov’s dogs. It’s a conditioned response.

Just like how my dog gets all excited when I start organizing my river gear. She can smell the river on that stuff and she knows what that means. But not because I tell her, “honey, we are going on the river again.”

And FWIW: I love my animals but I don’t LOVE my animals!

Cats and other animals obviously don’t understand human language but they can pick up on surprisingly subtle cues. Look at “clever Hans” for instance. Farris’ cat sould easily have noticed changes in his behavior and become alarmed.


but then again, take a look at the rest of the books they sell…

I think I might order “Imagining Atlantis” It really sets the tone for anything else you could read of these peoples lists…

I’m surprised y’all let this one slip by…

That was bad, Coldie. You deserve to be shmacked.


Now never do it again.

And as for Farris… didn’t you notice? He’s Ms. Gargoyle now.

I don’t think so, Spoofer. Madam Church Ornament only made one post, and is more likely someone who dropped in here because Kellibelli posted the URL of this thread on another MB.

So… Farris? All cheesy puns aside, where are you?

Maybe he followed my advice. Which would be in our AND his best interest.

Larrigan? I sometimes fear for your mental health, man… “How to speak Cat”?? If you like a cat, stroke it. If you don’t, kick it. All the language they need :smiley:

Where the fuck is Dr. Doolittle when you really need him. I sure that psycho son of a bitch could clear up this misunderstanding.

Here kitty. Here kitty, kitty.