Favorite 'Postal 2' Quotes

Cafe Society
1

“This can’t be good for me, but I feel GREAT!” - when Postal Dude smokes a ‘Health Pipe’.

“YES!” - Several times, one instance being when the priest asked you if you put money in the poor box. The pause and then enthusiastic response when P.D. is lying cracks me up.

“I guess the politically correct thing would be to kill the women and minorities first.” - usually said after killing a woman or a minority.

“So that’s what that feels like.” - the first (and only) time I was attacked with scissors.

“Bring it on, you pajama-wearing pagans!” - a priest in a cut-scene, during an attack on the church by Muslims.

“Colonel Grossman warned us this would happen.” - from a bystander, during an interesting experiment involving catnip, 13 cats, a grenade, and several gallons of gasoline.

2

“Ow, my nads!” usually said when attacked by a dog

“Today is the first day of the end of your life”

“Oh god…whats that stench? It smells like someone slaughtered a goat! No really, I want to know…” When you go in the grocery store.

“Ohhh…thats the ticket!” when you urinate on people. Particularly funny because it seems to make people go absolutely insane

3

You reminded me of another one…

“Now the flowers can grow” - another urinating saying.

“I can’t die, I’m a virgin” - from various terrified bystanders, including some decidedly non-virginal looking ones.

“I know what you’re thinking, but the truth is, I don’t even like video games.” - usually after doing something very violent.

4

must … get … this … game…

5

“Slow roasted goodness…” after burning someone to death.

6

Ugh. Try the demo first (100+ meg download). The graphics are terrible and the AI is shit. I’m sure it will hit the bargain bins in no time.

Sorry guys, the violence is fun but the game looks and feels like it should have come out in the '90s.

7

I think the graphics are pretty good, really. They aren’t cutting edge, but they definitely aren’t bad, even on the lower detail levels. It does need a beefy system to run at the higher detail levels, though, and I’ve found that the way the game adjusts the detail for your system’s performance is overly conservative - I can always bump it up quite a bit from what it defaults to, whether it’s on my 1.5 Ghz with a GF4 or my friend’s 800 Mhz with GF2.

Don’t judge the game entirely by the demo, either. The demo has no real difficult errands so it doesn’t have any of the actual meat of the gameplay - you can just wander around causing trouble, which is a lot of fun, but the full game has a lot more gameplay to it. There are some really difficult situations you will find yourself in while running the errands, and each day there are more and more people who will attack you on sight, and the population is more heavily armed each day (well - sorta. When my friend finally got to Thursday, it seemed like less people were armed than on Wednesday).

Oh, and if you get the demo, bring up the console with the ` key, and type SET GAMESTATE DEMOTIME 9999. This will increase the time limit from 7 minutes to around 160, giving you plenty of time to explore the one area that comes with the demo.

8

I’ve seen the full game version and the graphics were definatly crap. The AI was horrendous. The dialogue would be better if the voice acting wasn’t so awful.

The tasks they have you complete are pretty good in concept but not execution. I’m sure it would be a fun game if people with talent were involved.

As it stands, it’s not GTA-Miami, that’s for bloody sure.