And Elaine with the wild-eyed look shouting “I DON’T LIKE THIS THING!! AND HERE’S WHAT I’M DOING WITH IT!!” is always hilarious. https://youtu.be/eYSgk2oC3-s?t=94
The entirety of S8,ep 5 The Package But particularly Uncle Leo’s eyebrows, Newman interrogating Jerry about the damaged stereo, George’s boudoir photo.
“But I don’t wanna be a pirate!”
“Bird flew into a woman’s head”
AT AN OFFICE PARTY:
CO-WORKER: So Elaine, you gonna dance this year?
ELAINE: Maybe…all over your face!
CO-WORKER: If you do dance, the cooks want to know so they can be brought out of the kitchen. They missed it last year.
Kramer’s bus driving story.
Jerry: You kept making all the stops!?!?!
Kramer: … They kept ringing the bell!
“Is that a Titleist…?”
RIP to pretentious accountant Valerie Mahaffey
“Papi-ay ma-chey”
That line is a classic! And it was reprised in the episode about Jon Voight’s car, where all his sneakers are gone and all that Jerry has to wear is a pair of cowboy boots: “But I don’t wanna be a cowboy!”
And referenced again when Kramer dons an eye patch.
Jerry: You look like a pirate
Kramer: I wanna be a pirate.
Kramer smacks his hundred bucks down on Jerry’s kitchen counter and says, “I’m out!”
In a subsequent episode, “The Puffy Shirt”, George, warned by his “hand modeling” employer to take very good care of his hands and exercise restraint: “No problem. I won a contest!”
Although it’s revealed in the series finale that George cheated (“Because I’m a cheater!”) and that Jerry won.
I love throw away lines.
When George refuses to leave a job and they are trying to make him quit. “Tomorrow they’re putting in asbestos.”
George: “I’d love to be a civil war buff.”
George: “Was that wrong? Should I not have done that? Because if someone had told me that sort of thing was frowned upon…”
George: Hang on, ma, hang on…
GEORGE: I didn’t know whether to try and keep her from falling or zip up!
JERRY: What did you do?
GEORGE: I zipped up!
There was shrinkage!
Elaine: It shrinks?
Jerry: Like a frightened turtle.
Elaine: I don’t know how you live with those things.