Favorite Star Trek quotes

TNG “Phantasms”

Data asks Worf to keep an eye on his cat, Spot, while Data will be away. Data gives Worf an exhaustive list of instructions, including how to praise Spot, how to feed Spot, how to make Spot feel comfortable and loved, etc.

Worf, warily holding the cat at arms’ length, finally and grudgingly says, “I will FEED him.”

From TOS: “The Way to Eden”:

Cosmic Hippie Folksinger:

Stiff man puttin’ my mind in jail
Judge bangs his gavel and he says, “No bail!”
Gonna lick his hands
Gonna wag my tail . . .

Also, the memorable chant: “Free Ton Sevrin!”

Same film – Klingon officer: “Shakespeare is best when read in the original Klingon!”

TVH, Kirk, walking away from an invisible Enterprise set down in Golden Gate Park: “OK, everybody remember where we parked.”

The TOS episode in question is “By Any Other Name.” Scotty is charged with relieving one of the Kelvans that have taken over the ship of his alien doohickey, so Scotty does this by overstimulating the Kelvan with alcohol. During this process, Scott decides to bring out something he was saving in reserve:

Kelvan: “What is it?”
Scott: “It’s … It’s … It’s green.”

It was actually Aldebaran whiskey, but Scott’s drunken state prevented him from articulating this thought. Later, in the TNG ep “Relics,” in which Scott is on the Enterprise D, he is repulsed by synthehol and Data offers him a real alcholic beverage from Guinan’s stock, using the same line to describe it. Later still in that same episode, Picard offers Scott the same beverage on the holodeck, as it turns out Picard was the one who gave it to Guinan in the first place.

To add to the list of quotes (since I now have my copy of Jill Sherwin’s Quotable Star Trek in front of me:

EMH: Stop breathing down my neck.
EMH-2: My breathing is merely a simulation.
EMH: So is my neck. Stop it anyway.
-“Message in a Bottle,” Voyager

Quark: “What are you doing in my closet?”
Brunt: “Conducting official FCA business.”
Quark: “In my closet?”
-“Ferengi Love Songs,” DS9

And a more serious one from some old school Trek:

“A man either lives life as it happens to him, meets it head on and licks it, or he turns his back on it and starts to wither away.” -Dr Philip Boyce, “The Cage”

"Captain, the most elementary and valuable statemnt in science … the beginning of wisdom … is: ‘I do not know.’ " -Data to Picard, “Where Silence Has Lease”

Nitpick: It was a cloaked Klingon Bird of Prey.

Isn’t that a quote from Moby Dick?

As translated from the original Klingon, yes.

You’re right; it’s been a long time since I watched that movie. :smack:

What would TOS have been like with Boyce and Pike instead of Bones and Kirk…?

“I’m tired of deciding who lives. And who dies.”

Nitpick : There is no evidence that Scotty’s Green Drink on TOS was the same as the Green Drink offered to him by Data on TNG; Scotty takes it to the Holodeck, and it is, in fact he who offers it to Picard there, not vice versa. Picard has a swig, and identifies the TNG Green Drink as Aldebaran Whiskey. (“Who do you think gave it to Guinan?”)

This suggests generally that Scotty hasn’t knowingly had Aldebaran Whiskey before - as he admits to not knowing the name of the TNG drink right before Picard ID’s it - and suggests specifically that it isn’t the same as the TOS Green Drink because Scott’s reactions in Ten-Forward and the Holodeck suggest he’s never even tasted the beverage before.

I stand corrected.

This reminds me of the episode where Deanna is going for her commander’s pip. She runs the simulation over and over, and the ship keeps getting destroyed. Finally, Riker yanks her off the test, saying he’s given her enough chances.

Troi sits for a minute, then runs the simulation one more time, asking Geordi, “Can you fix it?” Geordi says yes, and she orders him to fix it, knowing it will mean his death, but realizing that it was part of the test, whether you have the fortitude to order someone to their death to save the ship.

And in our ironic title department, the title of the episode where Deanna is forced to use her “finely honed” command skills in an actual emergency? “Disaster”, if memory serves.

It was actually that episode that led her to think she should try for her command pip. Before she hadn’t thought of it.

Worf to O’Brien and Bashir, who were discussing the Battle of the Alamo:
“If you believe in the legend of Davy Crockett, then he died a hero’s death. If you do not believe, then he was just a man, and it does not matter how he died.”

Kirk in ST4, on the bus: “Well, *double * dumbass on you!”

From ST III:

GENESIS!!!??? Genesis planet forbidden is!

Thus my use of the sarcastic-quoties. :wink:

Your mention of the test episode reminded me of Disaster. Reading what I wrote, it does seem I implied it was a later ep.

“You must tell him he is a good cat. A pretty cat.”

Classic.

Data: There was a young lady from Venus
Whose body was shaped like a—
Picard: [interrupting] That will be enough, Mr. Data!

And the garbagemen in the park as the can was flattened by the invisible ship: “Did you see that?” No, and neither did you!"