I have two questions:
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Considering that funerals are usually sad occasions, is it weird to have a favourite funeral?
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Did you have a favourite funeral? If so, what made it your favourite?
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A: Yes, it is weird to have a favorite funeral.
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My favorite funeral was Muppet master Jim Henson’s. It will not and cannot ever be replicated. Link
News coverage: Link
I went to a Hindu funeral that I thought was beautiful, visually. Each mourner was given a flower to place on the body which was dressed all in white.
I don’t think it’s weird and, if it is, who cares? that said, I’ve only been to a couple and none of them were any good aside from getting to see some people I hadn’t seen in awhile.
but I think someone could put on a pretty good one; just haven’t seen it.
OP here.
I do have a favourite funeral. It’s not that it was exactly “fun”, or a happy occasion, but it’s my favourite anyway. It was the funeral of my former college music teacher. There was a lot of his music performed at the funeral, and I got to perform some of it. Plus, one of his friends, another teacher at the school, gave a great speech. It was well attended, and well done.
My grandfather died at age 102. He was pretty damned healthy until a few years before (even bicycle riding with the grandkids in his 80s), and the end wasn’t bad. We mostly stood around going, “well… that was a good life.” It’s hard to pull out the usual funeral platitudes when the deceased really did live a long, healthy, active, decent life.
This thread would not be complete without Graham Chapman’s funeral.
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Not sure. But then, sometimes funerals are for people you personally loved and care about a lot. And it may seem that the dedication or services done to them, to honor and celebrate his/her passing, are not good enough, or something is “off”. Perhaps favorite won’t be true, but just that there are some funerals that seem to do justice to the departed.
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Although there are details and pieces I liked from other funerals, I have to say that my “favorite” was from my maternal grandfather. What made it my favorite was the sweet, short speech his godson made, mentioning how much influence my grandpa (former teacher) had on him, and the importance he placed on education. Fitting, for my grandpa. It was also a small convoy (only very close family and friends).
My grandmother’s. She was 96. During the ceremony, a big snowstorm blanketed the area. When we went to the hotel afterwards, it got worse and worse. We ended up sitting in the hotel lobby all day, people going out (I had left my car at the funeral home and had to go back as the story was paralyzing New York City), others taking their place as we sat and chatted. We managed to get rooms for everyone in the hotel; with cots we managed to get 3-4 in a room (we had two reserved, but the hotel got filled up. My father was told that no rooms were available and asked “what about the one that just cancelled?” The clerk said, “How did you know about that?” He said, “Someone always cancels.”).
It was sad, but after 96 years, it seemed like a good long run. I spoke at the service and even got people to laugh a little.
A distant 3rd cousin’s ‘Grateful Dead’ funeral. His wake had him in an open casket, jeans, a purple tie-died T-shirt, and a can of beer in his hand.
I never knew him (or even about him) in life. Two minutes into his wake, I SO regretted that…
Well, I guess it would make sense if it was the funeral of someone you really hated, or maybe even someone that you killed yourself.
Exactly what I thought of.
I am not a Liberal supporter in Canada. However, Justin Trudeau’s eulogy of his father (and former Prime Minister) Pierre, with Jimmy Carter and Fidel Castro in attendance, is perhaps the most beautiful eulogy I’ve ever heard. This was in 2000.
For our international friends, Justin Trudeau is now the leader of the Liberal party of Canada and quite probably will be the next Prime Minister in 2015.
It really is quite beautiful.
ETA: Added hyperlink.
Early on in Thailand, when I lived up North, I had a Thai acquaintance who told me one day: “My sister died. Would you like to go to her funeral?” I didn’t even know he’d had a sister. I went. Turned out it was more of a wake, at a temple near the local airport. The coffin was decorated with blinking Christmas lights, and a full-blown party was underway. Lots of drinking and gambling. I got rooked into some sort of card game where they’d deal me the cards, look at my hand, advise me how to bet, inform me I lost and take my money. After a couple of hands of that, I excused myself and spent the rest of the evening drinking.
I never attended a funeral in Hawaii, but the funeral notices in the newspaper always end with: “Aloha attire requested.” That means everyone’s supposed to show up in Hawaiian shirts. I like that.
My father in law’s funeral was fun. He was super cool, and ran a restaurant for twenty years, so the was a total “family reunion” of all the cool people he knew throughout that time, most of us in our twenties and thirties. At first it was somber, but several people showed up with cases of Korbel (his favorite) and we all got drunk and talked and had the mostest fun! It was really great, and exactly how he would have wanted it. They was only a small service during the wake, so once that was over, it was Katy bar the door.
I don’t have a favorite funeral per se, but it’s good when whomever gives the eulogy or sermon knew the deceased well and can talk about the good without getting sugary and mention the bad without getting ugly.
Well I enjoyed a part of the funeral for my brother. He was friends with a lot of biker types. (I am not a biker type) Anyway, they insisted that “No backhoe is going to bury Tom” and they brought a bunch of shovels and let me and anyone else who want to help actually bury him. We filled in the grave.
It was good to do something physical and something very very final.
I have favorite funerals. Mostly I like the ones where the men lower the casket and they all grab shovels and start shoveling in the dirt. I always feel like I am at a movie watching a funeral scene. It really has a big impact on me.
And then there are the great celebrations of life with bands and dancing and lots of good food.
It was the worst and the best.
The worst in that it was my mother’s.
She was a great Mom- too good in that she was too nurturing & protective. Almost thirteen months ago, after a four month battle with a quick-acting brain tumor. During it all, she was in good spirits, got lots of visitors & phone calls, had little pain, minimal emotional distress till a couple of days before she went into her week-long deep sleep (with moments of semi-consciousness in which she could tell us she loved us & sing hymns with us), followed by a week-long coma which ended in her death. She was 73.
The best in that it was just the sort of service she wanted. Our church had recently split, which broke her heart. As she requested- ministers & members of both churches spoke & sang at the main church. After I spoke, we opened the floor to anyone who wanted to speak & about a dozen did, including people I’d never met - one lady speaking on behalf of her sister who could not be there, but in high school, that sister had been the shy ‘new girl’ and Mom had befriended her, introduced her around, and incorporated her into her circle of friends.
The only way it could have been better would have been if Mom had decided it was so good, she’d resurrect so she could join in.
The second-best funeral was that of a portly, bearded, fun-loving Mennonite-turned-Charismatic pastor whose family, friends, fellow ministers spoke & sang, ending with a video of him singing a rousing version of “Ain’t No Grave Gonna Hold My Body Down” as about 5 or 6 people committed their lives to Christ.
A buddy of mine died a while back. He was a biker and one helluva tattoo artist. He did many of my tattoos. One policy he had was to never charge a cop for tattoo work. From the funeral home to the cemetery we had a procession of cars many miles long. Cops showed up by the dozens, lining the route and helping with traffic control. There was much partying, but in a respectful manner.