I have a big business trip coming up in what seems like an alarmingly short time, and although I’ve been on (honestly) hundreds of business trips before, for some reason I am irrationally afraid of it.
On or around Dec 7th, I must fly to Poland, do a presentation at a power plant there. Then fly to Madrid, Spain, rent a car, drive to a power plant, and train 5 engineers for a week. Then I have to fly to London and have a big marketing meeting for a day, stay over the weekend in London, take the Chunnel to Paris, meet with Electricite de France for a sales meeting, and then fly back on or around the 20th.
If it seems odd that I’m doing so many things in one trip, well, it is. When people found out I was going over for the training in Spain, they started saying “oh, well, while you’re over there why not do this and that so what’s-her-name doesn’t have to make a trip - since you’re already over there”…etc.
During this time, I will also be cut off from #straightdope chat, and probably Board access, due to having to dial back through my company’s firewall only. So I will be missing for 14 days. If you want to get an important message to me, you can send it via pepperlandgirl, as she is the sole person who has my work e-mail.
Anyhow, I don’t know why I am so nervous about this. I only get this way on long trips away from home, and this one is the longest. Maybe it’s because I worry about something happening to my SO, to the house, to the cats, or maybe to myself. I get sick a lot (diabetes sick, not sniffles), and although I have never been sick yet on a trip overseas, there has to be a first time…
Maybe it comes down to my fear of strange places and people, resulting from what happened when I was a teenager. And in Europe, all alone, I am definitely in a strange place with lots of strange people. I’ve been there many times before and liked it, don’t get me wrong. But because of what happened to me I’m still the person who catches their breath involuntarily out of fear if large men enter an elevator with me. So running around Europe for 14 days will expose me to a lot of uncomfortable situations.
But what else can I do? Hide at home? Quit my job? I just have to keep soldiering on, and hope that someday I will not be afraid of certain things. But it’s been 17 years now, and if I haven’t recovered yet I probably never will.
Anyhow. I’m so bothered by it I barely slept, and I still have another 10 days or so before I would have to go.
Just thought I would put my thoughts down is all. If you have some helpful thoughts for me, I would dearly appreciate them. Otherwise, please do not say anything hurtful to me, and click on past.
Una