Juggling chainsaws, bear wrestling, auto trepanning, fire eating and volunteer work.
[hijack]
** CanvasShoes ** You have nothing to worry about! I just moved out of Anchorage (after 11 years) in Feburary and believe me the lower 48 ain’t all that. Believe me these tiny little states don’t have anything on Alaska. Once you’ve gotten used to the earthquakes, the volcanoes, the moose wandering through traffic, black bears in the parks, the darkness, the light, the snow, and Theresa Obermeyer there’s nothing you can’t handle, even in the real world…
Dig this, in most cases you’re going to come across as the sophisticated and learned individual when around a group of lower 48ers. Know why? Because they aren’t going to know a damn thing about Alaska and will ask stupid questions like “Did you need a green card to move here?” and “Is it really always dark/light in the winter/summer?” Trust me, just like with (most) wildlife they are more afriad of you than you are of them
OMG, haven’t thought about her since the last time I went to “Christmas in Spenard” (btw, Alice Welling has added Bill Clinton to her repetoire, if you’ve ever seen Mr. Whitekeys show, that might be worth a return visit).
fwhAAAAAAAAAASSSSSAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUH, it’s a conspiracy, My husband has PURPOSELY been prevented from fwhAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSSSAAAAAUUUUUUUUH…passing the bar 47 TIMES!!! fwhAAAAAAAASSSSAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUH
Dallas Texas, at least that’s my plan. That’s where I’ll end up first. We’ll see where it goes from there.
This is an interesting topic. When I was younger, I was afraid of virtually everything. Now I’m just scared of “lots of stuff.” In general, I’m not scared of pain or death, but plain old humiliation. However, I’ve known I have a problem with fear for so long that I frequently force myself to do things just to overcome my fears.
One problem, related to what minor7flat5 said, is that whenever I think about starting some activity, the only people I can find readily are the fanatics, who are very visible, and naturally they’re really proficient.
Things that I’ve done by going straight to a teacher or school: skiing, snowboarding, skydiving. Apparently, most people aren’t born with inherent knowledge about these things, so the instructors don’t expect people to know about them.
Things that I just forced myself to do without finding a teacher or mentor: motorcycling, going to the gym, public speaking, rollerblading.
Things I’m still scared of: going to the grocery store (I fear that the cashiers are judging me), answering the door on Halloween (I fear that the children are judging me), going to the gym if I haven’t worked out in several months (I fear the other patrons are, well, you get the idea).
for me it was learning guitar. It took me 20 YEARS to get up the courage and commitment to try. My father and brother, and numerous friends all play wonderfully, and I was frankly very intimidated by it. When I was laid off last year and had a LOT of time on my hands, I borrowed one of my brothers old guitars and asked a neighbor friend to show me some things. I am so glad I did! I am certainly a rank beginner by most standards, but it gives me a sense of enjoyment that I never had before.
Playing cards - specifically, card games requiring a partner. Oh how I hate when my husband tries to get me to join a game. I don’t have a strategic mind and I can’t pick up on a partner’s clues. I can’t count the number of times I’ve been yelled at for trumping a partner’s ace or something.
I’ll grit my teeth once in a while and allow myself to be cajoled into playing, but I truly hate it because I can’t understand the stupid games. I’d almost play Monopoly before a card game, and I really hate Monopoly.
I’m with Krisolov in the guitar playing thing. I want to be able to play, but not put the effort into learning to play. Why can’t I live in the Matrix?
And surfing. Since I live in a beach town, a lot of people surf, but between not having a board, or balance, I’m a little reluctant to start.
I recently had my first kayaking lesson. I’ve been whitewater rafting about 15 times, and I’ve always envied the kayakers. It turns out my boss kayaks whitewater, and he’s offered to teach me on a local lake. My first lesson wasn’t great, but I learned I won’t drown! He’s even offered to give me one of his older kayaks if I decide I want to keep at it.
I would like to take voice and piano lessons. And I need to go back to riding lessons. I just can’t really afford a riding trainer and still keep my horse.
Soooooooooooooooo many things unfortunately, especially anything athletic since I truly have no “jock” ability.
Even something that can be very solitary - like running. I worry that anyone who happens to see me will KNOW that I’m a beginner, and will silently mock me. Crazy …
Funny, if I’m with someone else who’s just starting, I’m fine - relaxed, having fun, not self-conscious …
But on my own - forget it!
I actually thought I was alone in this kind of fear - I’m so glad I’m not the only one!!!
Ditto for me on the Gym thing. So instead I have a Bowflex in my bedroom, a heavy bag in my living room and a treadmill in my closet that I stub my toe on at least six times a day.
My biggest fear is changing jobs. I have been offered many jobs over the years, but I can not fathom leaving my profession. I have had one job since I started working for a living, fourteen years ago. I love what I do, I love the people I work with and I really enjoy working with the public. Yet, I am underpaid for the amount of effort/blood I put into my work (the benefits are sweet, so there are… ummm, benefits to working there).
The most recent example is, my sister-in-law is opening a flower shop in the Village, NYC. She currently works from a studio and has been begging me to be her office manager for the last year. Now that she is opening a store the offer has come up more frequently. Each time we get together I hope the topic won’t come up. I know that I will be an excellent addition to her team and I’d be making double the salary, but I am so freaked out by the prospect I occasionally have nightmares about it.
We should ALL take solace in what Stainz said. Just this one thread and you see how many other people have the same (irrational) fears you do. I suspect this true in all walks of life, not just this board.
Also I’ve found that when you DO overcome your fears and try something new, 99% of the time it’s completely different from what you expected! People are nice and helpful (not laughing at you), the thing you try is not as hard as you thought, etc.
I’ve done some minor-scale interior decorating for family and friends (a couple have even paid!) and I’ve started a portfolio to trend the ‘before’ and ‘after’ pictures. For anyone who’s ever seen my work, and I’m talking about my own home too, they swear I should go pro. Well, since my bout with agoraphobia has welled back up and I’m not doing another damn thing anyway, I’m seriously considering starting it up as my own business and drawing in potential clients with a first room “freebie”, they just pay for materials. Then, if they like what I’ve done for them, they can contract me for more (at very reasonable prices, obviously). My only problem is my FEAR. And other assorted, related phobias. I’m just so friggin’ terrified.
So, if anyone has any suggestions for that, I’m all ears. And, I’ll even go a step further and offer my services to CanvasShoes when she finally relocates to Dallas, seeing as I’ll only be about 30 minutes away. That is, if you’re interested. I can rattle off design styles I’ve worked on and even list references. If I weren’t so chickenshit, I’d probably be able to move along a lot better on this than to simply daydream about it whilst battling another panic attack. sigh Just lemme know (my email’s in my profile) and I promise to be at your beck and call. I’ll even bring store-bought cookies! Apologies for not being able to cook. Not my forte.
It’s actually kind of sad. I think the worst thing in the world is “what if”. What if I had called that girl or gone out for that team or taken that job. I’ve tried a lot of stuff in my lifetime. Some of it worked out. Some of it didn’t (ie cross country team in high school - your want me to run HOW FAR?! Fuck that shit!)
I guess everyone is afraid of something. For me it’s the whole marriage/kids/house in the burbs thing.
