The rule in our household is that adults may consume alcohol anytime, as long as they are not still in their pajamas.
… what about being in each other’s pajamas?
TMI?: Well, in reality neither of us own pajamas. So it’s kind of just an empty rule. 
Had to drive to work yesterday because I had an early morning doctor appointment.
Driving home and running low on gas. Gauge still shows one notch above E, but the ‘check gauge’ light comes on. This pretty much tells me I have about 2 miles of fuel left, but I’m not near a gas station. I head for the closest one, an Amoco station, and pull in with my car sputtering on fumes. I pull up to the pump, slide my card and… The goddamn pump reboots.
I walk inside after about 2 minutes of nothing on the pump, have to search to find the one clerk, who is wandering aimlessly around the back. She checks and says that it didn’t run my card, just wait for the pump to come up. I do. It comes up, asks for my card and immediately reboots again. FUCK THIS SHIT. I start up and head over to the nearby SuperAmerica, hoping I can make it.
I pull in there and am pulling up to a pump, car about to die. My front bumper is even with the pump when this guy in a pickup truck suddenly veers sharply in front of a car leaving (almost causing an accident) and tries to cut me off and take the pump. OH FUCK NO. It’s already too late, so he backs up and goes around to the other side, giving me the stink eye.
Slide my card, start pumping gas and it keeps stopping about every 0.2 gallons. :smack:
Got just a couple of gallons, enough to get me home and to a pump somewhere else after work tonight.
Run across the street to Leann Chin. Order some food. Guy rings it up. $8.01. I hand him a $10. There’s a stack of pennies on the register, but he starts counting out my 99 cents in change. I stop him and say “can’t you just take one of those pennies?”. Oh yeah. Asks me if I want sauce. I tell him yeah, I want the garlic pepper sauce. Hands me the bag. No sauce. I ask for it again, he says “isn’t it in the bag?” NO. Gives me the sauce. Ok, how about my fortune cookie? Again, “Isn’t it in the bag?” NO. Geez kid, are you completely unaware of what you are doing?
Things were much better when I got home.
“One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas…”
On and off since I got to Australia I’ve been temping for a non-profit that I’ve really come to love. They do great work, they’re run well, and the department where I was working is filled with good people.
Turns out this final project they brought me on to help with is way smaller than expected, so instead of having a week and a half left of work I have one day left. Instead of two weeks to have a final romp around eastern Australia, I now have four weeks and considerably less money.
It’s obviously not a huge difference but still. I was counting on those last two paychecks and now I’m back to begging for day-to-day work from the temp agency. Fuck fuck fuck.
(I can’t believe no one has bitten on this.)
What was he doing wearing your pajamas?
" How he got into my pajamas I’ll never know."
You know, like Coca Cola. Or pets.com. Or AMC Theaters, the iPhone, Time-Warner Cable, Facebook, Timex, SnapChat, and a million other things.
I’ve had it up to here with trendy startups coming up with shitty nonsense names. Attention, cool kids: your business names suck! I’m looking at you, Uber, Zoosk, Spotify, Shazaam, Aereo, and Twitter. You have awful names for your products and you ought to apologize.
No love for Queeph! ?
How do you guarantee that I will never purchase a product from your website?
That’s right, you require an email address before you’ll even let me browse.
Buh-bye butttmunch. See ya never!
Anyone else irritated by the Liberty Mutual ads?
I’m gonna be laughing my encounter-suited ass off soon. Way too many of my condo complex neighbors are parking right next to their buildings, directly under three metre long fingers of doom two stories above them. When their cars are pinned to the driveways like butterflies in a display case, I will have to point and laugh.
Why is it that every time they report on this story, they always preface Chris Kyle’s name with “the real American Sniper”, as if all the other snipers were fakes, or maybe weren’t Americans. And at this point, is the epithet even necessary?
Yeah, those aren’t nearly as clever as they think they are. Even Rob Lowe’s DirecTV commercials are better.
Now, the suddenly popularity of screaming goats in commercials for everything from phone service to insurance, that is a trend I can get behind. I laugh my ass off every time I see one of those.
Stop making me laugh, it hurts.
My rant is that for Valentines Day, my husband gave me a pot of live catnip, a bag of liver treats and the Martian Death Flu. For the last couple of days, I wouldn’t have cared if the cats were playing with flame throwers in the bedroom closet, as long as they were being quiet. (We don’t actually keep flame throwers in the closet, they are locked up in the gun safes.) The dogs have been sleeping on the bed BAD DOGS, but neither of us have the energy to actually chase them off.
We’ve been living on water and chicken broth. Its been 3 days since I took a shower, and that just seems to make the dogs love us even more.
I think I’m recovering. I’m able to sit up and complain about it. My husband is still a lump under a mound of blankets. A SNORING lump. I’m going to now put my feet on the floor and try to stay awake long enough to take a shower. If I don’t post here again, it will be because I fell asleep and drowned. The fucking cats wouldn’t help because cats and water don’t mix. The asshole dogs are both too happy to be sleeping on my husband who probably has a temp of at least 170,000 degrees. Actually, the cats are also there.
I’m suffering and dying and I’m all alone and ignored and forgotten.
GET YOUR FLU SHOTS EVERYONE1 This bug isn’t one that’s in this year’s shot, but dang, this sucks.
Very weird day yesterday…all caused by a cup of coffee…
I had just finished a morning conference call and got up to stretch my legs. Behind me I heard splash followed by trickle…trickle…trickle
I turned around and saw my laptop covered in coffee. Not just splashed, but the entire contents of my extra-large Dunkin’ Donuts cup had tipped directly onto the keyboard, submerging the keys. My chair is a high backed office chair, and it had rotated in such a way that the back struck the Styrofoam cup.
I quickly ripped the cords out and flipped it upside down, shaking it. Then grabbed paper towels and tried to clean it. I then spent a half hour opening it up and cleaning out the interior, using blasts of compressed air to clean up or dry up whatever I could.
No dice. It would boot, but then it shut off seconds later.
Crap.
Since I work from home, I had to hop in my car and drive an hour to the office to have the help desk folks look at it. “We’ll give you a loaner, and your machine should be fixed in a week.”
Oh well.
I drove the hour home, started installing all of my apps on the loaner machine, then got an email saying “We swapped out the keyboard and battery and you are good to go. It’s ready.”
It would be faster for me to drive back and get it than to continue installing crap on the loaner machine, so that’s what I did.
On the way back I hit a pothole and blew a tire. Ended up changing the tire on the bridge going over the Delaware. In the cold biting wind. At least it wasn’t snowing or raining.
Ended the afternoon at the tire place paying about $250 for the new tire (it’s a low profile sport tire).
All because of a cuppa joe.
Mom’s still in the hospital, and her cognitive functions are almost back to normal. Her heart is very,very weak though and she tires out easily. I think they are backing down on a heart replacement and moving toward finding a drug that will actually work. Fingers crossed.
I, on the other hand, am still sick. (sniffle).
Would people PLEASE stop saying or typing “skidder” when what they mean is “skitter”? Please? It’s like nails on a chalkboard.
And while we’re at it, you HOME in on a target, not HONE. You hone a knife. And you don’t impact something, you have an impact on something. Only teeth impact.
–Morgyn, whose English sensitivities have been violated too frequently of late