Disclaimer: This is meant as a parody to those “Feed the Children”–like shows, but it brings up valid points about what our and our children’s ideals should be. Sorry if I offend anybody.
I am starting a new charity, called Feed the Models. Models are wasting themselves away to some false ideal of the perfect woman. They use fasting, purging, smoking and illegal drugs to keep themselves impossibly thin. All this to fit into a size 1. As a result, they looked spaced out on the runway, and I oticed lately that some of them were on the verge of passing out.
We must tell the clothes designers that there are other body shapes that men love. We must tell models that it is okay for them to have body shapes other than straight lines. You are now bad role ‘models’ so to speak, to girls today.
The first model I am going to sponsor is Kate Moss. She was the epitome of the thin-is-in craze that is engulfing the nation. But did she exercise to be that way? Nope. And, alas, she could not handle the fast living associated to the fashion life. Earlier this year, she had to go to a recovery clinic for her heroin addiction.
Please donate a chocolate bar, pork rinds, any spare food that you have, that will give the models some shape. They can look like real women again, but only with your help.
Oh, no you don’t. Any chocolate that gets donated around here goes to the hardworking staff (for example, ME). Pork rinds and such can go to the models.
To quote or paraphrase George Carlin, “Rich cunt won’t eat, fuck her.”
I would send food but someone who consciously decides that she looks better when she resembles a Tim Burton animated character doesn’t seem to be worth saving. Now, I’ll feed someone who cannot help looking like an emaciated Ethiopian refugee (people who are sick–suffering from anorexia, bulemia, cancer, etc) but damned if I’ll lift a finger to help some stupid bitch who purposely eats nothing but kelp, drinks nothing but champagne and water and has a heroin problem Kurt Cobain would have been envious of. I realize this thread was a parody but these models are stupid. What good does it do you to have $80 million in the bank if:
[ul]
[li]You can’t wear many pieces of jewelry because your stick-figure arms and neck cannot support the tremendous weight.[/li][li]There’s no point in going to really ritzy restaurants because you can’t eat anything anyway.[/li][li]You can’t drive yourself because if you lose power steering, you’ll just crash and die since you’re too fucking weak to turn the wheel without it.[/li][li]Your life expectancy is much shorter than other people your age because of the intelligent combination of drugs, alcohol, no nutrients, and sleep deprivation.[/li][/ul]
I have absolutely no sympathy for people who deliberately destroy themselves but especially if they are destroying themselves just so other people will look at them.
The reason some of them look undernourished is because some of the are actually THIRTEEN!!! The haven’t yet fully developed secondary sexual characteristics. When they reach adulthood, they’ll be has-beens.
Is it just me, or are some of these waifs downright ugly?
The first thing I think of when I see one of these twigs is, ‘Gee, I’d like to take her out to dinner - so she can have a square meal!’
To me, this craze just shows the weakness of clothing designers, that they have to select the body for the clothes instead of making clothes that fit the bodies.
First of all, the fault not only lies with the models who starve themselves for attention and employment, but the moron fashion press for giving them the attention, and the moron public who worship them.
I’m a size 22. Somehow, I managed to escape the hell that is American Womanhood, because I don’t care about my size. I don’t give a flaming rat’s ass about fashion. I NEVER cared about fashion or about size. I’m probably the only woman who’s never bought a fashion mag in their life. Do I give a shit about that? Of course not. The world is more than what I wear. Somehow, if most women started believing that, we’d solve a lot of problems.
So, here’s twenty bucks and a box of Pop-Tarts to help your crusade. Good luck.
Go Evilbeth! That had a catchy tune, and I moved to the rythmn. 8.5
To the OP: I have a spare bag of oreos I can donate, but the Pepperidge Farm Genevas stay with me. Sorry. Can’t part with it. I do however live in the south now, I can probably find some pig pickins or some fried food to send.
WOO HOO!!! Go, Robin. But I have to say you’re wrong about one thing: I’ve never bought a “fashion mag” either. Sure, I’ve looked at them in the checkout line, moving my eyes from the stick-skinny picture of the cover to my bag of Nacho Cheesier Doritos, back to the cover. Did it stop me from buying the chips? No. In fact, I bought two bags. (Thought I should take advantage of the “2 for 1” sale anyway.) I’m not skinny and I don’t care.
On to the OP: I’m not giving them anything. I don’t give a rat’s fat ass if these creatures are willing to starve themselves for fame. I’m keeping my Double Stuf Oreos and my “no-bake” cheesecake. Fuck them. Like Beth said, their accounts are hovering at $80 million…I’m sure they could afford a pork chop or two.
Please will anybody give? Operators are standing by.