I have a patient who is 92 years old and is sharp as a tack. She comes to my ER periodically for irregular heart rhythms or breathing problems, and I do not know her outside of my job.
My problem is that she is my favorite patient, and I think it’s because she is as old as she is and has this great attitude. She doesn’t whine, she always calls me by name and apologizes for being in the ER and “bothering us”. The trouble is, she is no bother! We all love her, and she usually has something very poignant (sp) to say…
I am posting this because I wonder if what makes her special to me and the others is her age, and we see her as a “champion” of sorts. I try really hard to treat all of my patients equally, but when I get an order to see Irene, I fall all over myself getting to her cubicle and giving her the treatment she needs, and that is wrong isn’t it? By that I don’t mean that I neglect other, more serious cases, it just means I look forward to seeing this particular patient.
So I am appealing to y’all who also work in the medical field (I am a Respiratory Therapist) to help me sort this out. I myself am 51, if that matters.
No, this certainly isn’t wrong. As you’ve said, you’re not neglecting your other patients. From time to time, we all become unusually attached to certain patients. Sometimes, I’ll tend to favor a patient for no apparent reason- there’s “just something about” that person.
The fact that you see this woman often enough to be familiar with each other is a big factor. The more time you spend with a patient, the more likely you are to become attached, even when your encounters are months apart. Also, she sounds like she’s as cute as a bug; some patients are easy to fall in love with. In the ER, I imagine you have relatively few patients that you see repeatedly, and once you have a patient stabilized you send them home or to another unit, so you have less opportunity for attachment. I also imagine that many of your patients are less than pleasant.
In ICU, I necessarily became very attached to a young woman who was with us for seven months before she died. When you take care of a person for that long, it’s impossible not to begin to feel she’s a member of your family. In fact, I knew her better than I know anyone in my family. Several of us felt like we’d been adopted by her family, because we naturally spent a lot of time with them, too. This was years ago, but I still have nightmares about her sometimes; I tried so hard to save her (we all did) but I couldn’t. I still feel that if I could do it, I would gladly give up my own life so that she could live.
You’re a member of a caring profession. Of course you’ll find yourself caring about your patients, some much more than others. It’s always okay to care, even though it breaks your heart sometimes. It’s just part of the game.
Objectivity is different than not liking a patient. You can be objective with their treatment and still like them. Besides which, you’re a human being doing a human job, and it is only logical for you to take more of a liking to certain patients.
I don’t see why you’re so concerned. I try to give everyone the same level of medical care that I would give a member of my own family. However, I like some of the people I see more than others for a lot of reasons, from common interests, sense of humour, positive attitude or other ones to subtle to define.
When giving medical advice, you can be hampered if you consider the patient “a friend”, however. Friends like favours and make it harder to be objective. If you want every patient to be your friend too, it is hard to do your best job.
Most doctors like their manic patients since good humour tends to be infectious. The ones to be careful for are the manipulative patients who will tell you that you’re the best doctor in the world if you do exactly what they want. This does not seem to be the case here. Any doctor who tells you they like al their patients equally is not being ingenuous.
I don’t see anything wrong with it either. Actually I have one similar regular patient myself…
My gentleman is a 78 y/o male suffering from CHF, multi-valve replacement, and chronic A-fib. He has recently had his lasix raised to a staggering 180mg bi-daily (120 one day, 60 the next)
I see him every Weds at my fire department. He rarely has anything “wrong” with him. He comes in, sits down. I take his vital signs every time, I run a strip to confirm the same chronic a-fib with multifocial couplets each time, and we sit and talk about his participation in the Royal Air Force each time.
I actually look forward to his arrival each night. Even though he needs nothing, he is my favorite person to see each week. I’ve actually recently been sadden by his condition…I have yet to know anyone who lasts long on that much lasix…