Finding a thread: giving telemarketers who call a business, a fictitious employee to contact

I had found this thread some time ago, but I can’t remember its title or the name given to the fake company employee whom the company’s employees would refer the bothersome telemarketer to, that persistently calls the company. The name would actually be some telephone code that would disconnect the pestering caller, or leave them in limbo. Can anyone identify this thread, please? Thanks. :slight_smile:

This is better suited for ATMB, so I’ll move it there for you.

Maybe this one?
The Telemarketer Speaks

Thanks anyway, but this isn’t the one…

Sent you to a link that wasn’t really the answer to your enquiry? How meta. :wink:

Was it this?

Relesha Jones…that’s The one! Thanks! :slight_smile:

Yes, it was! Thanks! I just couldn’t think of the fictitious name “Relesha Jones”! :smiley:

I see your Ms. Releasha Jones, and raise you Helen.

“Wha?” you ask?

Many yharin ago, I worked for a gentleman, to use the term loosely, who was a legend in his own mind. In addition to our real jobs, he sold and installed phone systems. We had a phone system that would be not taxed to be in a office that had 200 staff. It was a tad bit of overkill considering there was three of us in the office. Every bell, whistle and blinky was on the system, including ‘Call Park’.

Now we got 1 real call per 25 or so inbound calls, so it was game on. Bill Collectors, telemarketers and assorted grifters would suddenly need to talk to talk to the non-existent 4th staff member, Helen.

As in Ms. Helen Whaite.

We would transfer the call to Call Park, and after 10 minutes the system would dump the call.

And they would call back…

Reminds me of the old Red Skelton sketch. He is doing his act onstage and is interrupted by a messenger from the theater manager. It seems a purse was found by a Mrs. Hunt. He announces, “If anyone is missing a purse, then after the show, they can go to Helen Hunt for it.” {pause} “Hey!” {ba-dum-dump}

What a chop! :smiley:

Gary Owens wrote a book titled The (What to Do While You’re Holding the) Phone Book. He offered suggestions for how to deal with nuisance calls, including blowing a shrill whistle into the mouthpiece, which would at least give the caller an earache; and giving the caller a loud razzberry. My Mom disapproved of the first suggestion, saying a caller could claim injury and sue. Personally I like to lay the handset on the desk and wait until they give up and hang up. Though that might not be practical in an office.