No shouting, no cursing, no threats. Here’s how it went.
HI, THIS IS (someone from some place) AND WE JUST NEED TO VERIFY SOME INFORMATION FOR OUR RECORDS. FIRST. . .
Excuse me. I didn’t catch your name. Who is this?
MIKE FROM (bland sounding company name containing “mortgage”). I WANT TO VERIFY. . .
“Bland sounding mortgage company name?” Do you hold our mortgage?
OUR RECORDS SHOW YOU CAN GET MONEY OUT OF THE EQUITY IN YOUR HOME. ALL WE NEED TO DO IS. . .
*Excuse me. What records? Do I have a business relationship with you?
. . . CLICK
What a wuss. I think Mike gave up awfully quickly. It’s not like I said “no,” or “fuck off and die,” or something that would constitute an actual rejection. I was actually a step behind him all the way through the conversation because our mortgage has been sold something like four times, and I was still trying to figure out if the call might somehow be legitimate.
In my day, telemarketers wouldn’t let you go until you hung up on them or at least blew a whistle into the phone. These damn kids don’t know how to work hard!