strangely be born without an umbilical chord (or afterbirth for that matter), which allows the waiter/stranger in the elevator/father-in-law/etc. who delivers it to wrap it in blanket and hand it to the mother.
Easy one: When the character gets roped into escorting the visiting out of town relative of a geeky and totally unattractive landlord/friend/neighbor, low and behold if the relative doesn’t turn out to be…
Drop dead gorgeous but in the future is …
CRAZY!!!
The obligatory gay character is always…
…single, and never able to score a date.
The wacky neighbor will always_________when it is least convenient.
“barge in”
When the main character’s parents visit, _____________
They will discover that the main character is a) having sex b) keeping a deep, dark secret and c) a lousy housekeeper.
When the main character gets in a jam, the wacky neighbor will be revealed to have an unexpected talent in…
…whatever it takes to clear up the problem.
When cooking Thanksgiving dinner while hosting the family for the first time, the oven door will be opened and…
Smoke will billow out from the horribly burnt turkey in the oven?
An oldie but a goodie. The husband and wife will argue about whether having a job or being a housewife is harder, so to settle the issue, they’ll ____________.
…swap places for 24 hours. She will be a smashing success at the office and a pain in the ass at home. He will be a miserable failure as a homemaker, and will see the error of his ways.
Two straight guys rooming together will have to pretend to be gay when…
one of them is trying to convince a woman that he is not interested in her, or…
One is trying to impress a client who thinks he’s gay.
When a sitcom runs for several seasons, the odds of a guest appearance by (character actors) _________ , __________, or __________ approach one. (It’s alright to use dead or ‘dated’ character actors who no longer make appearances.)
Formerly: Vincent Price, Charles Lane, Imogene Coca, William Schallert, Nanette Fabray, Eleanor Donohue
Current: Sarah Silverman, Debbie Reynolds, Danny DeVito, Wendy Malick
When a sitcom actress is pregnant, but the character isn’t, producers will hide the pregnancy by…
…shooting her in close-ups, or hiding her behind counter tops.
When a guy’s new girlfriend comes to his house for the first time, she opens his fridge and finds…
Beer, a pizza box with one shriveled slice remaining, an onion and a tupperware container with dark fuzz inside.
If a girl brings a guy home to meet mom and dad…
…Dad will turn out to be the person whom Guy:
– stole the last parking space in the mall lot from;
– yelled at for having over 12 items in the express line of the supermarket; or
– completely hustled at pool in the local sports bar.
When a sitcom child has to do a science fair project…
The father either blows himself up or makes something so complicated and involved that he doesn’t let the kid do any of the work and the kid hates it of course.
If there is no father to help with the science project then …
…it will always be a vinegar/baking soda volcano.
When the mom is doing the kids’ laundry…
she’s always wearing business casual and the laundry is never actually seen wet- and in fact it hardly looks like it needs washing.
Common architectural features of middle income houses and apartments (though not yours or that of most people you know) include…
Greek style pillars at the front, a white picket fence, swimming pool, phone in the kitchen with an unfeasabily long cord.
The father’s daughter is dating a boy of a different race, and the father initially expresses concerns…
…but he learns his lesson later in the show when someone from another race comes to his aid.
On the family vacation…