sitcom cliches

OK, I know this has been done before in some form (possibly to some extent in the recent “Things in Movies You Can’t Stand”), but I’d like to get a fresh, complete list of sitcom cliches. Every time the wife and I see one on a show, I sarcastically announce, “Sitcom cliche #36” or some such. These are things that you can see coming a mile away, that you’ve seen on countless other sitcoms. (They MIGHT still be funny, but this is not a requirement.) A few to get us started:

1.) Person angrily storms out of apartment, only to sheepishly return moments later, realizing it’s his own apartment.

2.) Person storms out of apartment, only to sheepishly return because of a forgotten coat or purse.

3.) Person bad-mouths boss, spouse, etc., while person #2 tries to subtly tell person that the one being bad-mouthed is RIGHT BEHIND YOU!!

4.) The line (or a variation thereof): “That was awful, deceitful, and wrong…I love it!”

5.) In older sitcoms, a “stereotypically black” character will say to the uptight white guy, “Gimme five!” to which the white guy will reply, “Do you have change for a ten?” or some such.

Others? I’m trying to compile a list to share with family on New Year’s Eve…

Person runs willy-nilly amock because of something he/she overheard and misunderstood.

Crazy neighbour next door.

If a man and a woman are friends, someone will assume they either have, are, or will sleep together.

A favorite topic of mine. I have a list of standard sitcom plot cliches, but it seems like you’re looking for single scenes. How about:

Guy stands on a woman’s long dress, causing it to rip. (bonus points for wedding gown)

Guy checks out a woman; wife/girlfriend makes smart remark.

If someone makes a remark to a minority as if she were a servant or secretary, the minority will always turn out to be the boss/interviewer/other high-ranking person.

Someone puts money in a vending machine, and doesn’t get anything, leading to violence.

Husband says that his (stay-at-home) wife’s duties are easy, compared to his job. Wife offers to switch roles for a week. Husband discovers that his wife’s job is not so easy after all. Occasionally, the wife comes to the same realization.

A couple intends to break up, only to immediately have sex again.

Someone saying “It’s just crazy enough to work.” This seems to be a tacit assumption that most sitcom characters make, if for no other reason than to keep the story lines interesting and wacky, so when they actually say it out loud, it actually sounds refreshingly honest.

Someone says, “Do X, you’d have to be a complete idiot to do X.” Cut to shot of another character doing X.

Cheesy pickup lines, of the sort you might find on web pages listing funny pickup lines, actually work, often.

Pretty much EVERYTHING that’s EVER happened on Three’s Company fits in this category.

The worst are:

Uh-oh! A case of mistaken identity leads to a string of wacky (and completely bizarre and impossible) mishaps.

When someone makes a vaguely racy remark and the “studio audience” goes “WOOOOOOOOHHH!”

Little kids warms the heart of crusty old man. (Punky Brewster is the WORST case scenario!!)

Someone has two dates on one night and doesn’t have the courtesy to break one.

The absoluste lowest point in ANY sitcom is when there’s a “Very Special” episode where they try to actually touch on a serious subject.

Great cliches so far. I love it. Reminds me of the time the Simpsons imitated that sitcom type show…

How about-
A woman says to a guy “That is the most despicable, disgusting, most humiliating thing anybody has ever done…” and then finishes with “you did that for ME?!” and tops it off with a smooch. Seen that one a few times.

Moms seem to have gambling problems a lot, a lot more than dads anyway.

  1. Marge in the Simpsons.
  2. Elise Keaton in Family Ties.
  3. Hi Opal! (I finally did it.)

I agree. Serious stuff.
“Death.”
“Alcoholism/drugs.”
“Sex.”
“Abuse.”
And each gets about one (maybe two if its a TBC).

Neighbor is richer/better off than the MC.

That’s all for now.

Stupid parents/genius kid
Incompetent father/do-it-all mother
Someone blurts out a secret by mistake and immediately says" You didn’t hear that!"

Huge apartments in New York City with minimal visible means of support (a waitress? with 1000 square feet in Manhattan?)

Someone accidentally begins to say something that they absolutely should not, and quickly correct themselves. They say enough of it for the viewers to figure out what they’re saying, but the person they’re speaking to doesn’t give it a second though.

Someone solves a Rubik’s cube by peeling off all the stickers. Sorry, those stickers are stuck pretty solidly, and if you tried to peel them off, you’d just tear them to shreds.

The one that should be a cliche, but is too famous, is Ed Asner’s line meeting Mary Tyler Moore for the first time. “You’ve got spunk. I hate spunk.”

The allegedly “adorable” red-headed child, with a lot of freckles, of course.

Well its off topic but I have to disagree w/ that Rubik’s cube one. My old Rubik’s cube had stickers that were sticky but not THAT sticky. Plus, they were made of some sort off plastic so they don’t shred to pieces when you take em off either. So you could peel em off if you wanted to and sometimes you just do because it becomes impossible to solve completely.

Re: Rubik’s Cube…

You can just take them apart, and then put them back together. This is a puzzle in and of itself.

Back to cliche’s…

  1. Parents always let their kids act like assholes. How many times do kids tell off their parents in real life? How many times are parents left standing outside their child’s door, silently pondering what was just said?

  2. Old people always whine.

  3. The boss is always an idiot. And horny.

  4. Coworkers never get along.

Fabulous list so far!

The “leader” after 9 hours is Gilligan (not necessarily in quantity, but in making me laugh).

This reminds me of another one: person laughing (or surprised or shocked) will spit coffee or other beverage everywhere.

Person walks into a surprising situation and exclaims:

“Oh my Gawwwdddd!!!”

I mean, no one ever says “Holy Horse Badorties” or “Yumpin Yimminy” anymore, it’s always

“Oh my Gawwwddd!!!”

Y’know how some people make fun of Asians by squinting their eyes and pretending to have buck teeth? Well, Japanese typically make fun of Americans by holding their arms up in a sitcom-ish “I don’t know” gesture while shouting “Oh, my GOD!!!” I’m serious.

Anyway,

  1. Character bumps head, causing amnesia. Hilarity ensues. Amnesia is cured by second bump in the last 5 minutes of the episode. Variations included other characters not knowing character has amnesia.

  2. Young character gets braces, frets that potential date will reject him/her based on new appearance. Conflict is resolved when date reveals he/she has just gotten braces, too.

2a. Young character gets braces, starts picking up radio broadcasts. Hilarity ensues.

  1. Male character disguises self as woman by putting on a wig and a dress. Fools everyone. Older male character tries to get cross-dressing male into bed. Hilarity ensues.

2001 just began 3 minutes ago where I am. Happy 21st century everyone!

–sublight.

How about two people talking about different things, but think they are talking about the same thing. I.e.

Person 1: I need to tell you something
Person 2: It’s alright I already know and Yes, yes I will.
Person 1: You will, really, I thought you would be upset.
Person 2: Upset, no I had the same thing happen when I was five.
Person 1: Five???

Hilarious.

Person A suggests Person B perform some outlandish or humiliating stunt. Person B refuses “I’d never do that. No way. Not in a million years. You can’t make me.” Instantly cut to a scene of Person B doing the stunt. Big yucks.

Person A is single but has told out of town family members that he or she is married. The out of town relative is now visiting and wants to meet the spouse. Person A persuades Person B to pretend to be their spouse for the duration of the visit. For additional wackiness add one or more of the following: A and/or B is gay, A and B are coworkers who constantly argue, B is secretly in love with A.

Young children on Adult Targeted Sit-Coms:

After obligatory “cutesy” scene, they disappear into their rooms to play quietly, never to disturb their parents.
Take, for example, Everybody Loves Raymond. Three kids under ten. After the girl delivers a cute joke, and the twin boys say something in unison, they run like cheetahs up the stairs, never to be seen again. No tantrums, no whining, no “Mommy she’s touching me,”, no “Mine! Mine! Mine!”.
And what kind of parents throw their kids into their rooms for the day and never even check in on them?

No matter what goes wrong, all is well in a half an hour.