Halfway to Ohio on my bike…
“It was raining outside, in the city of a thousand alibis, but inside trouble flew on gossamer wings.”
–Fantasy Noir.
“It was always easy to make Jim laugh, provided you had the right combination of complex polysaccharides and arachnoid misery.”
“Joani loved Chachi, a fact taken into account when Ralph the Mouth was found filled with buckshot on a remote pier.”
“It was the best day of my life, barring that time I killed an Alaskan werewolf with a pair of pliers and the corpse of a long-dead musk ox.”
““I can’t believe I nuked the whole thing,” George Bush gaped.”
Oh, I’ll be back. This is too goddamned tempting. 
“At that moment, Commander Tsala decided she liked the smell of burnt flesh.”
- First line of my third Star Trek short story, and my personal favourite.
Okay, I know this isn’t a thread about our favorite novel openers, but I love Camus’s “Maman died today. Or yesterday maybe, I don’t know.” The Stranger rocked.
Camus can do, but Satre is smatre.
The publishers had emphasised that his new work must have an arresting opening, developed in a way which even the most casual of book-store browsers would find intriguing and rewarding. That he had managed this, and still retained a quite stunning yet pleasing suprise for page 7, was something which pleased him greatly.
In a rectangular triangle, the square on the hypotenuse equals the sum of the squares on the other two sides.
It was a dark and stormy night …
(Oh come on, someone HAD to add that one.)
Actually, once at work, a VERY long day started with this seemingly innocuous comment from a fellow employee:
“Is that supposed to be making that sound?”
The ‘day’ ended 64 hours later … seemed like that WAS a novel.
“So, anyway as I waded through the pool of Coors light I could clearly see that Anna was indeed alive!”
Her innocent eyes looked like perfectly fried, over-easy eggs, and I had the sausage that would complete our breakfast of love.
“Once upon a time on the Straight Dope Message Board…”
TVGuy, write it down, I’m intrigued.