Turtle shells are ridiculously strong.
It actually makes sense that a turtle shell on a seven-foot mutant turtle would be super strong.
Eh.
There was a recent animal cruelty case where some douchebags beat a turtle to death, breaking its shell, with golf clubs. Maybe the alligator wasn’t applying all of its impressive bite force.
Graphic Image and story:
http://americablog.com/2013/06/turtle-beaten-to-death-golf-club-wisconsin.html
I can think of two reasons.
For your consideration: A really big turtle. (Also, an incredible turtle-related coincidence.)
[old man hat]
The first Turtle movie was a thing of beauty. Everything since has been a pale imitation. Get off my lawn! Someone fetch me my belt-onions!
[/old man hat]
Japanese motifs for Eeeevil character’s office? Check
Turtles looking vaguely afroamerican because it’s sooo funny if they start talking in ebonics? Check.
Pretty flowerpot bimbo fainting when in danger? Check.
HOW DID YOU MANAGE TO MISS ANY OF THAT?!?!
Well. It’s typical Bay. Some of the best CGI Hollywood can offer, with absolutely beautiful animated Ninja Turtles, a triumph of science and imagination… wasted in a movie made by a moron, writing stock characters talking in clichés in a badly structured (if at all) nonsensical plot crammed with shots than move constantly for no other reason than to give the impression of dynamism where there’s nothing.
That said, the “it’s just a mask” joke? Beautiful. Probably the one salvageable part of the movie.
I’m pretty sure the reports that they were aliens were just a misconstruing of the whole ooze thing, so…
What? How is this evidence of anything?
Sure, I’m having a bit of fun with the first two. I’m sure that the portrayal of the turtles will be race neutral and the Japanese décor is part of the original comic.
However, Megan Fox looking pretty and fainting like a 1940’s damsel is clear cut evidence of Bay’s mentality. Very hard to miss, even.
You have some weird ideas about what black people look like.
Oh, right. Now I’m the racist.
Look, you can recognize a racial caricature without being a racist yourself. Let’s not be silly.
…and I still think the special effects looked more convincing in the 1990 movie.
Person fates at the sight of mutated monsters is such an old gender-neutral trope that I can’t believe you’re bringing it up.
TMNT (and April in particular) is even mentioned on the page!
Both Shredder and Splinter are Japanese men who are actual ninja. Japanese decor seems rather in character.
Speaking as someone who has twice fainted after suffering quite minor injuries, I don’t consider that happening once after being confronted by inhuman monsters to be a problem. If Bay tries to turn it into a running joke, then it might bother me.
Can’t you? You can’t believe that somebody brings up a female character fainting as a deeply ingrained sexist trope? Really? No, I mean, REALLY? Gender neutral? Really?
Settle down, Beavis.
More to the point-
It’s a trailer. Everyone will have the same opinion of Mr. Bay upon finishing its viewing as at the inception.
So just sit back and enjoy the awesome. Or don’t. But it sure ain’t a referendum on the man’s development as a filmmaker.
There are movies with men fainting, as well. (I have a feeling like The Avengers had such a scene, though I’m not certain.)
I stopped watching Bay’s films after Con-Air, but of the films of his that I have seen, I think most of them didn’t really have any women at all (Con-Air, The Rock, Armageddon). But the one which did, Bad Boys, she seemed pretty integrated into the team as a full member (or at least, no worse than Joe Pesci in Lethal Weapon).
I’ll grant that overall, he doesn’t seem to be particularly invested in relationships, as a director. He’d rather put in as minimal a quantity as is necessary to establish the main character, which ends up making the spouse/girlfriend/whatever be little more than window dressing and eye candy. But everything in a Michael Bay film is window dressing and eye candy, so I wouldn’t put that portrayal down on sexism so much as vapidity.
Of course, he may have gone off the rails with sexism after I stopped watching.
What? Are we not supposed to bitch about movies now in CS? Or about directors? Well, this place is going to get boring fast if that’s the case.
While it’s hard to make a particularly deep analysis in the fairly empty-headed vapid action movies destined to young males Bay is famous for, there are plenty of indications about Bays sensibilities in race and sex that are discussed every time a new movie is launched. Grumman wasn’t talking about it out of the blue.
Aren’t Bey and Megan Fox supposed to have had a huge falling out? Which is why she was replaced in the Transformer movies?