A long time ago, I once conversed on a message board with a (probably) Chinese man who was exulting over China’s recent development of stealth jet fighter aircraft.
Now, this was nothing surprising - what patriot wouldn’t be pleased about his country making inroads in advanced military tech? - until he began to elaborate further. He felt that now that China had its own stealth fighter jets, that *Western women would now be impressed with China, and hence more inclined to date or get into a relationship with Chinese men. * :dubious: :dubious:
So, what is the most…“interesting” logic you have encountered before?
The conversation went like this:
(Dumbass) - Hey Kelevra, you’re a science type, which is bigger: A kilometer or a kilogram?
(Kelevra) - Umm, you know those measure different things? One is distance, the other is mass.
D - yeah, but one of them has to be bigger.
K - OK, let me ask you this. Which is bigger: a mile or a pound?
D - A mile obviously.
K - Well there you are, a kilometer is bigger than a kilogram.
I remember during the Persian Gulf War, the Iraqis tried to demoralize US troops with propaganda broadcast over the airwaves, which had the opposite effect because they were so wrong. One such broadcast was something along the lines of “While you are over here fighting, your wives and girlfriends are sleeping with Tom Cruise and Bart Simpson.”
This was before Google was as ubiquitous as it is today, so I was wondering what the planning for this was like. “Acmed, who is big representative of decadent Western culture?”
Dumb friend: I’m making a Pina colada, but I don’t have coconut milk. I’m going to use cow’s milk instead.
Me: Um, that won’t work.
DF: They’re both called milk. They’re equivalents.
This is the same friend that believes there’s a benefit to putting room temperature beers into a room temperature cooler.
A friend of mine, from high school, went on a “crash diet” wherein he ate copious amounts of canned pineapple chunks. His logic was that they serve pineapple chunks at Chinese Restaurants, so Chinese people must eat pineapple, and Chinese people are all skinny, so if he ate lots of pineapple, he’d get skinny, too.
My wife is always saving money by buying on sale. Last weekend she saved us over $100 by buying a load of crap at discount prices. Somehow this logic didn’t apply when I went to the Boat Show. I could have saved $30,000 buying a 30 ft. cabin cruiser there.
My mom bought my dad $200 ties. Every time she spent $200 in Thailand (this was in the '60s, when $200 was a lot of money), she’d buy a tie for my dad. (Dad called them his ‘Thai ties’.)
Hillary is a conniving, no-good, PC, liberal, Washington type. Because, you know, Benghazi. Oh, and emails. Don’t forget emails.
So I guess I’ll vote for a profane sociopath with no experience to lead the free world instead.
A while ago, as one does, I spilled coffee on my laptop, and all over my computer mouse. The laptop was fine, but the mouse was dead. This was half an hour before the stores closed on a Saturday. In a state of panic that I might be without a mouse until Monday (I know, I know, the horror!), I instantly rushed out to buy a replacement. I made it to the store literally three minutes before closing time.
I was very happy. Net number of working mice: 1.
When I got back, the first mouse was working again. Apparently, it just needed to dry off. Now I was very unhappy. I had rushed to the store and spent money for no reason. Net number of working mice: 2.
But - aha! Then I noticed that the scroll wheel was still not working. Apparently, the coffee had done some lasting damage after all! Once again, I was very happy. My mad dash to the store, and the money spent, had not been in vain. Net number of working mice: 1.
Apparently, under the right circumstances, having one functional mouse in my possession makes me happier than having two. I’m pretty sure this is some variation of the sunk cost fallacy.
I chucked the first mouse in a drawer. If I plug it in now, it probably works perfectly. But I don’t really want to know.
Last year or a couple of years ago, Mrs. L.A. was doing laundry when she noticed the dryer was not heating up. She didn’t like the washer and dryer that I’d ‘inherited’ with the house, so she decided it was time for new ones. She bought a new washer and a new dryer. When she tried to use the new dryer, it wasn’t heating up. Turned out one of the two fuzes the dryer uses (in the fuze box – not a breaker box, dammit ) had blown. The old dryer was perfectly functional.
But as I said, she hated the old appliances anyway.
My old boss read that cherries would help alleviate his gout. But cherries were out of season. So he began eating cans of cherry pie filling. He couldn’t figure out why he gained twenty pounds.
A few years back, I worked security at a little festival, with the team all camping together. Midway through, a really strong wind sprang up, buffeting everyone’s tents pretty badly. I rearranged my tent to be more streamlined and noticed one of my colleagues also moving hers, but so the broad side was getting the full blast of the wind. I pointed this out to her, to be told “Yeah, I know what I’m doing, this way there’ll be more of it to stand up to the wind.”
Thanks for sharing that, made my day!
) had blown. The old dryer was perfectly functional.