I couldn’t find it, but there was a previous thread where someone was asking if there was a surefire wish (like when a genie gives you three wishes) that would be impossible to get screwed. Or were they giving an example of a wish and asking how you could screw it up? Anyway, here’s one I thought of, does anyone see any loopholes in it?
“I wish that from now on, you had to grant the intent of a wish, to the wisher’s satisfaction.”
Penn Jillette, of “Penn and Teller,” wrote a short story about this in which the wisher constructs a logical sequence of wishes in which he gets unlimited wishes AND prevents the genie from screwing him. The genie’s none too happy about it but has no choice. I can’t remember exactly how he phrased it but one of this wishes was essentially the same as yours; another was immunity from death while making a wish; another was the genie’s full and honest disclosure on all matters. It was awfully well thought out.
Bah, it’s easy to get wishes that can’t be screwed up. How about “I wish I had a peanut butter and jelly sandwich”?
Okay, smartie pants, how big do you want your sandwich? Say, microscopic sized, or bigger than Texas? Hmmm?
I’m pretty sure there could be a flaw.
Did you ever see one of the movies called “Bedazzled”?
I like the one where Peter Cook shnookers Dudley Moore over and over.
Perhaps, “I wish you would satisfy my every wish for all eternity,” would serve?
Oh, and as for sandwich wishes? It’s always possible that the turkey could be a little dry.
Quote from Kat:
Bah, it’s easy to get wishes that can’t be screwed up. How about “I wish I had a peanut butter and jelly sandwich”?
You’d end up with it in the biblical sense.
Reminds me of a very short story I read some time ago. I don’t remember the author but it goes some thing like this.
Suddenly there is a very small man on my desk and to my surprise he asks me “All right buddy what do you want for your third wish”.
“My third wish, what happened to my other two?”
“For your second wish you asked for everything to be the same again.”
Thinking this had to be some kind of joke I said the first thing that I thought of. “I would like to be irresistible to women.”
“Funny, that was your first wish also.” he replied as he waved his arm and disappeared.
Also, where do you want your sandwich? On the table beside you, “in” your hands, or how about in your head? (BTW, no offense was meant for the last comment, just an example of the possible dangers of that wish.) Also, what if the sandwich contained some kind of deadly super-contagious virus, and in eating it you’d release some horrible plague upon the world?
Well, for starters, it should be “have”… and it also should be more specific, e.g., “the intent of a wish to the satisfaction of whomever makes the wish.” Dictionary.com includes “the fulfillment or gratification of a desire, need, or appetite” under the definition of satisfaction, which could also cause problems since the genie can interpret it literally in whatever way he wishes. Also, that second comma could cause some problems.
Ah, but that would make it a peanut butter, jelly and virus sandwich. Naturally, I would need to be specific enough to say, “I wish I had a 6” x 6" x 1" sandwich consisting of creamy Jif peanut butter, strawberry Smuckers preserves and Home Pride butter top wheat bread and no harmful additives* on the table in my kitchen." or something along those lines. I would, also naturally, have my wish vetted by the SDMB, because although I knew I’d have to specify the type of peanut butter, jelly and bread (even though I left that out of my post), I didn’t consider the size issue, the position issue or the deadly virus issue. I was actually channeling Hobbes, except I don’t care for tuna fish sandwiches.
*Any better way to phrase that to keep out viruses, bacteria, poison, crawly bugs, etc.?
Had a bad day again
Got frustrated
In the midst of my swearing, muttered “I wish I was dead!”
Sayonara.
Genies used to screw people over all the time. Then I thought I’d outsmart one by wishing for something they couldn’t screw with. I said “I wish that genies never existed and no one could remember them.” At least I think I made that wish. I no longer recall whether or not this really happened.
Well, I guess it should be: “no additives that can be harmful to myself.” After all, what’s harmful to humans may not be harmful to, for example, the dung beetle.
“I wish for you to grant me the three wishes I would ask for if I possessed absolute knowledge and wisdom.”