Point 1 was the best I could come up with that would explain why a person eating an expensive meal should tip more than a person eating a cheap meal at the same restaurant.
I think you missed the point.
I’m confused by the confusion here, and slightly outraged (ok, not really) by the slight amount of outrage.
It’s perfectly obvious that what the waitress did was very deliberately give you a slight discount out of her own pocket as a (successful) gambit in the hope that you would leave a larger tip in return. Yes, she risked the chance that you would stiff her and leave her to make up the $1.88 to the restaurant. Presumably, she has found that on average she makes more money this way (or is trying something new and hopes that she does).
Yes, it’s a bit manipulative, but what if you’d asked for the correct change, and she’d said, “Oh, I gave you a little discount just to be nice because you were a good customer. If you want change for something else, I can get it for you, but if you want to leave a tip, forget about it, just pass the favor on to someone else!” You wouldn’t still feel upset, would you? She may be genuinely sincere about that, even if she knows that on balance, she wins from this arrangement.
In fact, she might figure that the time saved by rounding everyone’s change up to the nearest round value is worth it to her even if she ends up making slightly less in tips per table. Counting money and worrying about tips are both stressful, as well, and she might find that she is happier and able to give better service with this method and earns more tips that way, even apart from any manipulative factor. And maybe she figures the people who would rather stiff her than give a slightly larger tip probably weren’t that happy with their service (or the larger tip wouldn’t seem unreasonable), so she is willing to eat the tip and the slight discount in the hopes that they will leave happy about getting the discount and will therefore return and be willing to tip more in the future.
In fact, the more I think about it, the more this seems like an excellent system that would benefit everyone, provided that customers don’t get the wrong message (as admittedly the OP did and many others apparently would) and as long as she genuinely accepts the occasional negative tip as part of the cost of doing business this way and doesn’t resent the customers who do so.
I highly doubt the waitress owns the business so it’s not her place to develop her own personal manipulative plan to increase her own tips.
I’d expect the restaurants policy is to give their customers the correct change. If she can’t keep her tipping schemes within the bounds of that policy she should be fired.
Seriously? When I worked as a waiter, the restaurant’s policy was that I owe the full amount of bill of every customer I served at the end of the night, and anything left over I get to keep. Beyond that, they really didn’t care what I did to get tips, and they actually encouraged us to be creative in making customers happy. If I’d dome something like that and customers complained, I’d have been told not to keep doing it, not fired. If no one complained, they wouldn’t have cared. Customers are not required to tip, and there is nothing wrong with giving a customer a discount if the waitress is willing to eat it.
I thought that the whole point of tipping was so that CUSTOMERS could vote on and reward the quality of the staff?
How does giving customers the correct change prevents them from doing that?
Being free to tip or not tip as they see fit?
By tipping less if they feel they’re being “manipulated”?
I’m not sure I understand what you’re saying either, bengangmo.
Of course customers are free to tip or not tip if they’re given the correct change. I think your point is that giving them extra change doesn’t deprive them of that either, since they can always refuse to tip at all. Which is true, and why the waitress isn’t doing anything wrong, even if it’s a little manipulative. She’s actually being nice by paying part of the customers’ bill for them, something that was never specifically addressed by store policy when I was a waiter in college, and that I can’t imagine would be actively discouraged. Certainly no one including managers would complain or even blink if I’d rounded change up to the nearest dollar (especially if it was close).
We were also told it was up to us if we gave small bills or large, and if we automatically gave change or asked customers if they needed it. From what I can tell from dining out, there is still no policy about these things at most restaurants, beyond “don’t cheat the customers or the restaurant.”
Even tip-outs (i.e., tip sharing from servers) to bussers, bartenders, hostesses and kitchen staff were entirely voluntary (though encouraged) as I recall, though I think that may not be the case universally. Again, as long as the restaurant got theirs from the server (even if the customers walked out without paying, someone pickpocketed your cash [which actually happened to me]) and no one complained, the managers didn’t care. They figured bad practices would be punished by lower tips.
I don’t think you realize how common this is.
Have you never seen a waitress tape pictures of her kids to the booklet she takes orders on or uses for change? Why do you think they do this, because they miss their kids so much during their 5-hour-shifts? Have you ever asked a waitress for a recommendation and been told how much her child loves something? Why, because she thinks you have the palate of a 7-year-old? Ever dined with kids and have the waitress bring up her own? Why, because she’s really going to buy her kid the same $400 Abercrombie coat as your son’s? Ever gotten a ridiculous tale of woe? Why, because you look genuinely interested in knowing her rent, or insurance, or car payment is late? Ever had a minor kitchen mistake, like no cheese or wrong side and have the waitress offer, “I’m buying you dessert.” Why, because she’s literally paying $12.00 out of her own pocket for two pieces of cake?
How’s management supposed to stop this shit, anyway?
I don’t really mind this nonsense, but I understand that it’s deliberate and calculated. I always tip 22-30%, unless the service is terrible or I get an over the top tale of woe, then it’s 15% (because they get taxed on sales in Michigan so they literally pay to wait on you if you leave nothing).
That was my thought. I can’t remember the last time I paid cash for a meal. Possibly last summer at a foot-long hotdog booth at the County Fair.
I’d have prefered you quote me in the full context. I also said:
I don’t paticularly care if a waiter mentions his kids as a means to guilt people into tipping more. I do care if they can’t manage to provide correct change. It’s thier job. If they can’t do that correctly because they are trying some asinine method to procure more money for themselves I think they need to find another career.
Is this a whoosh? Why would the waitress have to come back again with more change? If you pay a $14 tab with a twenty and can’t figure out to say, “I’d like ones back,” YOU’VE done a shitty job of meeting your needs. How the fuck does she know you’ve got no other money on you? Do you look like a homeless person?
I hope you’re happy; you are the reason people get $12 back in 12 ones.
Through amazing powers of deduction a waiter should be able to determine if I need change I probably don’t have the appropriate bills to provide a tip. If I did I’d have the bills available to leave the exact bills I needed to leave bill+tip.
Sure. I have no idea why they couldn’t bring back a $5 and 7 $1s though.
This is the second time you’ve said this. Do you not get that this is an oxymoron? She’s being manipulative. That means she’s doing something wrong.
And It’s not win-win. It’s all about her and getting me to give her more money. If I give her more than I would have given her, I lose. I don’t get a discount unless I stiff her on the tip. That’s the point of her little manipulation. I either give her more money or I feel guilty.
You make higher tips by giving better service, not by trying to make it harder on me to give you what I think you deserve. Yes, it’s a small amount of money, but, again, that’s part of the manipulation.
Here’s how I would want to deal with it. I tell her that she must’ve made a mistake. And then if she claims it’s a discount, I thank her profusely and (truthfully) tell her it’s so nice since I don’t have a lot of money and that it’ll be nice to be able to afford to treat myself to [insert piddly thing here]. (Which I will truthfully use that money to buy.)
Legitimate discount–she feels happy for helping out. Manipulative trick, she feels guilty (if she’s capable) for trying to get more money out of me, and has to make up the difference out of her own pocket.
Whether I’d have the guts to do it, I don’t know. I’d probably just figure whether I could afford the extra money and go from there, either way writing in to management later–thanking them for the discount.
Don’t say things that are equally as stupid.
No, that’s NOT their job. No restaurant has a policy of giving a customer $.97 in coins instead of a $1. That would be idiotic.
She did give him the CORRECT change, plus some. What she did not do is give him the EXACT change. It would have made no difference what she’d done if he’d had a fiver and five ones in his wallet. There are many ways he could’ve resolved this without leaving the ten.
Management doesn’t need to do a thing about this girl, and the last thing they should do is institute some idiotic “exact change” policy. Experience will take care of this girl as she learns that many diners decide they need two dollars more than she does if she’s so cavalier about giving away money.
If her scheme really worked consistently, do you think it would have taken until 2015 for someone to figure it out?
You don’t carry cash much, do you? Whenever I hit the ATM I take out $200, and it’s always 10 twenties. I always have $20s and some smaller bills on me. I could easily have a $28 tab, pay with two $20s and WANT a $10 bill back. (Because I’m tipping with $7 I already have.)
Asking for change suggests nothing about which denominations I have on me; it only suggests that I’m paying with bills large enough that I’m not leaving all the change as a tip. I cannot believe anyone would deduce anything more than that.
Yeah, I was just giving you a hard time because point 2 was so good. 
Can solve it all with one word: Say “Singles…?” instead of “Change?”.
It’ll help diners who read this who eat at restaurants in the future.
It’ll help ease posters back firm the edge of another “Tip Thread” knife fight.
And it will keep people from thinking you’re that crazy kid on the bike from that Cusack movie screaming,
**“I Want my Two Dollars…! I Want my Two Dollars…!” **