Fox News = Howard Stern

Success breeds envy. Howard Stern has been the number one rated radio show for years and has set the standard for “shock” jocks throughout the industry. Using scantily clad women, saying outrageous unfounded statements, and allowing any douche-bag with a voice a microphone, Fox News has cleverly copied his winning format and sits atop the cable news networks in terms of viewership and crassness. So how did Fox News do this? Glad you asked! Read on and be amazed that nobody has yet, or would bother to, draw the obvious parallels.

  1. Say any dumbass comment that comes to mind.

On a fist bump between Barack and Michelle Obama – “A fist bump? A pound? A terrorist fist jab?” – Fox News

Ah, ain’t America grand? I wonder if this is what our founding fathers had in mind when adding in that whole “free speech” crap in the Bill of Rights. Howard has made a damn good living insulting, degrading, and shocking us all for years. But he is an entertainment show, the word “News” doesn’t appear anywhere in his show title. So what was Fox hoping to accomplish by leading with this tidbit? Did they have some proof? Were they leading up to some big expose? Is Obama a secret Muslim? Nope and nope. But it sure did make people tune in the next day to see what they would say next!

  1. Nudity, Nudity, Nudity!

Howard was the first person in radio history to have a naked female on the radio. It may not sound like much to you youngsters out there but this was when the Sears catalogue still provided half the country with free masturbatory materials every month. Fox News of course is a cable channel and in this country (stupid country) nudity is not allowed on “regular” television. But something so trivial would never stop the copy artists at Fox News! They cant show nudity but they can show the shit out of sexy bikini clad women! I kid you not when we say these sections are on the front page of Fox

“From Bikini to Coture”
“Yankee Girlfriend Showdown!”
“Sexy Stars Cheerleader Pasts”

And just to be dicks to the Hollywood elite:

“Attacked by a Cougar!” - Not what you would think!

And then they have some crap about H1N1 and angry americans on health care. Blah…blah…blah… boobies!!

Please add your own!

For now I’m moving this to Cafe Society from MPSIMS. It may be destined for the Pit.