Alright listen you fucktards. You obviously have a monkey with ADD in charge of deciding which shows to keep and which to cancel. Let’s review.
Firefly - Made it 14 episodes before the plug was fully pulled. Sure 2 were never aired. Sure the ones which were aired were out of order, misadvertised, and generally fucked all to hell. But you cancelled it. The fandom rose up and in one motion gave you a big motherfucking middle finger, and went on to make history by raising the dvd sales so high that you made a FUCKING movie. No the movie didn’t do well but again, it’s because the movie got made and was hardly advertised.
How about Wonderfalls? Another cult classic. 13 episodes. Meanwhile a few copycat shows go on to do very well. Hmmm imagine that. You kill a show early on and then find out that the formula works. Oops. Asshats pay attention.
Oooh this one, The Tick. Yet another cult classic show. Oh? It didn’t do well? Patrick Warburton was too big for your teeny weeny little cameras? Or did he just make you feel inadequate? So you only made 9 episodes. Yeah, nine. Do you see a pattern forming here? I sure as fuck do.
Family Guy - Here’s one you gave some love. 50 episodes in its first incarnation then you guys give it the axe. Yep 50 whole animated episodes. So then, yet again, the fandom rises up in one voice to proudly proclaim “FUCK YOU DICKWAD” and then you guys go “Oh you really want this, okay, here’s more.”
Futurama - Ahhh Fry. Great cartoon. Followed the same pattern as Family Guy except you gave them 72 episodes before the fans again went “LISTEN YOU SONS OF STD INFECTED WHORES, WE WANT MORE.” So you go alright, we’ll go halfsies with you all. Well fuck you very much.
How about Dark Angel. Jim Cameron and Jessica Alba. And you fucking end the series with a “To be continued”!? That’s against the law in many countries. In fact, if I become President of the USA, I will personally prosecute you for treason for such an act. How does that make sense?
And the latest example, Drive. Another Tim Minear creation. You bought into the show. You knew it would be expensive and you knew it would be character driven. And yet you cancel it after three episodes with two waiting in the wings. Did you expect instant success? Are you so money hungry that House reruns are more enticing than offering a new show? How the FUCK does this make sense???
There is a very clear message here. The message is that Fox is a network which doesn’t care about the quality of shows put out, it cares about shows which make them not just sums of money, but gobs of it. Gobs of money immediately. And yet the recent track record shows that most shows which are immediate successes quickly peter out with a few notable exceptions.
My question to you, oh retarded network, what exactly does the crystal ball of yours say? What do you see when you’re high on your drugs that makes you think that three episodes is a clear picture of the worth of a show?
I’m done. Even my man love for Gregory House is not enough for me to continue to put up with you. You think that you can disrespect your fans by ending a show so early? You have no respect for fans. You only see one thing, money. Well FUCK YOU.