If you’re offended by people making up different – probably raunchy – lyrics to Christmas carols, you’d better leave now. Otherwise, make up some lyrics and post them here! I’ll start with a fractured Good King Wenceslas.
Once a good king went to sea
And his name was Wencel
He ate oysters so that he
Could put lead in his pencil
Buggering the cabin boy
Wencel thought was dandy
Wencel was a goodly king
But a trifle ra-an-dy!