There are a few Seattle threads going on now, and it’s occurred to me that there are quite a few Dopers up here. And yet we rarely seem to get together. There’s a DopeFest thread, but most people who replied are busy that day. I’m a tentative for a meet-up, only I’m 100 miles away and it’s on a Sunday.
I work in Belltown, and Seattlites don’t strike me as being particularly friendly. They seem helpful, but aloof. On the other hand, in New Orleans it’s pretty easy to strike up a conversation on the street. You can be a friend of a friend and you’ll be welcome. Seattleites, like Los Angelinos, seem to take their fun seriously, as opposed to New Orleans where people seem to just spontaneously have fun. It seems much more casual in The Big Easy.
If we are allowing non-US cities, then the answer is easy: Hama, Syria. Without a doubt, the friendliest place I have ever been.
How many other places have random policemen, old women and 12 year-old boys coming up to you and saying “Welcome to Syria, thank you for visiting my country.” I think one could avoid ever staying in a hotel there as people will compete to see who gets to invite the foreigner to stay in his house.
I was in a bar on the waterfront in Seattle a few years ago which was full of couples and groups of friends who socialised with the people they came in with but not with strangers.
I was there on my own(Billy No Mates)and was chatting up the barmaid,the other barstaff hearing my accent started chatting to me about Britain.
The couple next to me asked "Hey are you English?"and then joined in the conversation at which the couple to the left joined in as well.
In no time at all quite a few others were in "our party"and we were laughing and joking away as though we’d all known each other for years,in fact as they said they’d all been going into this place for years but had never spoken to each other.
Anyway after a couple of hours I told them I was going back to the hotel as I’d spent all of my U.S.dollars(Iwas off to Canada in the morning and had changed up my money) at which one of them said he knew a great bar and that they’d all treat me.
So we went off in a small convoy and not only did they lash me up to drinks but even bought me a lap dance.
What a really great bunch of people,unfortunately I never kept in touch with them but I always wonder if they remained friends with each other after all those years of rubbing shoulders but not knowing one other.(One was an ex Navy Seal as I recall)
I think that in many places the people are not unfriendly but reserved.
I think that cities which have more pedestrian traffic are more friendly. People are used to coming into contact with other people. Compare that to a city like Dallas where you go from one place to car to the next place.
San Francisco, New York, and Portland, OR are probably the most friendly cities I’ve been to.
In my experience, everywhere is pretty much the same. People in big cities can’t nod hello to every passing stranger, because it would be impossible. I’ve walked into bars in several big cities and found myself in friendly conversation with a stranger within minutes. Then again, I’ve walked into small rural pubs and experienced that clichéd thing where the hubbub of conversations suddenly stops and gives way to silence.
I’ve never been to NYC or Paris, but I’ve heard from many that the famed rudeness doesn’t really exist. People just have developed a mutual understanding where they omit some pleasantries because they’re in a hurry and they know you are in a hurry too.
I can’t think of any place I’ve been told to fuck off when, say, asking directions, in many cities and towns in several countries.
In Rotorua, New Zealand in 2004, we were using an internet cafe and when the owner realized we were American he told us to “get the fuck out of my shop right now and go find yourselves some Iraqi prisoners to torture!”
We were a bit shocked and did file a complaint with the local equivalent of the Better Business Bureau… just the Chamber of Commerce as I recall. Having been to Iran, Yemen, Lebanon etc. it is odd that the only real Anti-American attitude we have run into is in New Zealand.
Even people I ran into at what turned into a "Death to America’ rally in Tehran were overwhelmingly friendly when they found out I was American. They said they were against the US gov’t and not individual Americans.
If we use the criteria of striking up a conversation while waiting for a train or queued in line for a game or hanging out at a bar, I would say in no specific order, New Orleans, New York, Chicago, Vancouver and San Francisco all rate at the top and San Diego, LA and West Palm are at the bottom.
Cincinnati was surprisingly friendly and just misses the cut. Boston, Minneapolis, Tampa Bay & Philly are in the middle.
If Brooklyn could count as a separate city, it is the most friendly by far. I think all Brooklynites* must be like me and love striking up conversations about anything usually with strong opinions. I always got a big kick out of visiting Brooklyn.
I haven’t really spent enough time in any other large city to form an opinion. However for small city that still feels like a city, Hoboken is fairly friendly.
Yes, I am of course exaggerating, but seriously, the people of Brooklyn are extremely gregarious.
Chicago is the friendliest big city I’ve been to. Not to say that I’ve experienced people being actively mean to me in other cities, but people just seem more inclined to share a smile and a joke in Chicago. Try to strike up a conversation in Seoul or London and people give you funny looks while edging away ever so slightly.
I suppose Edinburgh counts as a city, but it always seemed more like a town to me. At any rate, the people there were lovely. They actively went out of their way to be nice. Some random guy even paid for my bus fare.
When I first visited New York (1981) a guy told us it was a friendly city but to stay out of Central Park out after sundown.
Albuquerque can be friendly, but in a disturbing way. Old winos will walk up to you and tell you the story of their lives, or maybe their latest conspiracy theory. Once I was sitting at a bus stop and a man walked up and handed me a poem he’d written. Just because.
Also, as far as small towns go, Jackson in Breathitt Co. Ky was pretty friendly. You’d go looking around and people driving down the road would wave to you.
Good point, I didn’t think about Edinburgh, but it was a friendly place which reminds me that Glasgow did not seem very friendly, not did Milwaukee and Glasgow reminded me of Milwaukee quite a bit.
It’s interesting that you say this as it mirrors my experience.
I’ve been all over and Syrians are, by far, the kindest and most genuinely friendly people I’ve ever met. The effect is so strong I found it off-putting at first and waited for the punchline. But no, there wasn’t one. Their disposition is genuine. Beautiful people.
It’s common in rural Australia where the density of traffic on a given road falls below a certain threshold (which you just know somehow). The traditional gesture is just one lifted finger on top of the wheel*.
*I used to know a mad bastard when I was working in a hay chaff mill out in the bush many years ago. He had a big ol’ bright red 5 ton truck. When somebody did the prescribed one finger lift, he’d respond by waving both hands maniacally, and the laugh his head off and say, “That poor bastard will spend the rest of the day scratching his head and wondering who he knows who drives a big, fuck-off red truck.”
One of our vacation/road trip games is waving to drivers in oncoming cars. If they wave back, we cheer; if they don’t wave, we shout “BASTARDS!”
My experience is if you express a genuine interest in a place, people sense that and open up to you. I’ve been taken on tours of local museums and given detailed driving itineraries to various points of interest just from asking a question or two about the locale.
OTOH, if I’'m just blowing thru town, I think people can sense that, too. Why should folks be especially friendly if I’m only stopping to get gas and use the bathroom?
