Fuck Marianne with a big rod of iron

And not for being cheese eating surrender monkeys either.

France having grudgingly agreed to accept some minor adjustments to the EU farm subsidies in 2003, now hold as undeniable truth that no further tinkering, or indeed cuts, should be even contemplated till goddamn fucking 2013.

“He must consequently preserve the CAP and guarantee maintenance of the amount of direct aid paid to our farmers until 2013.” - the fucking idiot Monsieur de Villepin says. Now where’s the damn guillitine when you need it?! Pathetic little scared man

2013 is ages away in this modern fast moving world, and they want to keep their big stinking parasitic snout down everybody wallet till far into the next decade?! The CAP already takes up the majority of the EU’s 85 billion euro budget - billions which are desperately needed for research and education, essential areas where Europe is steadily falling behind the US and Asia. But nooo, non non non sacre coer!! Stinking French peasants making goat cheese and posh wine, which won’t even give you a good hangover and no-one wants to drink, have got to have it served till 2013 - and probably a good way beyond that, and fuck the rest. Toady leeches and bloodsuckers all. The real problem with France is not its welfare system, graying population, 35 hour work week, burning cars and intifada in the streets, or even the fact that they can’t dance and their women have hairy legs. No the real problem with France, and now the problem for rest of Europe too, is that they’ve turned into a bunch of pathetic little scared men, scared shitless of the future, desperately trying to stop change, globalisation and everything new and unknown. Fucking pathetic losers. The rest of Europe will have to push them dragging and screaming into the fucking future.

Minor pit:
Fuck Britney (or whatever) up her pussy with a medium sized baseball bat made of pink painted aluminium.

Now it’s perfectly understandable that you want to keep your rebate, seeing as the frogs are such pathetic little eunuchs trying to hide under the bed. And everybody wants to cut the fat off the fat EU bureaucracy - hooray for that. But why the hell do you propose a EU budget which puts the onerous of all savings on the new east european EU member states?! The poorest and weakest members of the union and the ones we in the west owe so much. The only thing the EU is good for. And you single that out for cuts. Fuck that.

Extra minor pit:
Fuck Spain and Portugal too. Carmen Maria Santzes y Calero and that little tight package Petita can take the handle of a tennis racket up the ass. Having received untold billions of EU regional subsidies over the years, we now have to hear those pathetic fuckers moan and whine at the prospect of seeing their subsidies going to poorer and more deserving east european and baltic countries. Show some gratitude fuckers and a bit of magnitude. Don’t be such pathetic losers like the fucking frogs.

Fuck Belgium too. Just because I’ve always hated those stinking idiots.

Yeah! Spain sucks! Bunch of turbot-stealing assmonkeys…

Oh, wait, we don’t like Denmark either.

Fucking Iberians.

Whle we’re at it, to hell with the Montenegrins!

Fuck all those damned Europeans. What have they ever done for America anyway?

Hell yeah! Damned Europeans. I hear they have cloven hooves and pointy tails, you know.

Wow…a hate circle jerk.

Fuck the Danes too! All that Viking looting and burning, and the bastards didn’t even invite me. They could have, but nooooooo!

I’m sick of the Swiss. I’m sick of their cheese. I’m sick of their chocolate. And, I’m especially sick of their blocky heroine, Heidi.

Land-locked losers.

I think Poland needs to be beaten to death with a bundle of coat-hanger wire. I once ate too much kielbalsa and was burping that shit for hours. Let’s give 'em back to Russia.

I was all fired up and ready to join in when I realized you didn’t type Mongolians. Took a bit of air out of my balloon. Can we include them anyway? You Euro-centrists are annoying me. :stuck_out_tongue:

Yeah well, screw the Mongolians. What did they ever do for us besides genocide. And even that was a long time ago. But I really think we should leave the Montenegrins out of this, because I once had a holiday girlfriend there from – or thereabouts, and she was really cute and sweet and could drink more vodka than three grown Russians from Leningrad called Ivan.

Fuck the Danes too. They conquered my ancient homeland. But we stuck them with the tab and now they’re stuck with it. Hah! fucking idiots.

Actually, fuck Montenegro. If it weren’t for them we wouldn’t have had that awful Makavejev film. (Inceidentally, fuck you, Dusan Makavejev! Your movies always make me feel like disinfecting my eyeballs; you’re almost as bad as Pasolini.)

(P.S. Fuck you, Pier Paolo Pasolini. How about hiring some actual actors next time? Yes, I know you’re dead. Doesn’t matter.)

I’m glad we’re getting this all out. Isn’t it cathartic?

I’ve been pissed off at Portugal ever since a buch of punks lifted my wallet on the Lisbon Metro. Of course I knew better than to keep any important papers or more than a day’s worth of money in it. Chrissake, when they divided their taking by three, it could barely have been enough to keep them drunk on crappy Portuguese beer through a single soccer game. Damn punks. I hope one of them puked on his girlfriend. Their parents probably get farm subsidies, too.

Andorra is on my list. Fucking bunch of mountain-dwellers. A country needs to have a larger population than my hometown, dammit! A bishop as a co-prince? Was the Reformation in vain?

You know, the Montenegrins gave us Nero Wolfe, and that buys quite a few eons off your Purgatory in my church.

P.S. Nice KITH reference, Larry Mudd, thanks for saving me the trouble of looking it up.

Iceland? Phhtooey.

Damn. I opened this thread thinking it was my Gilligan fantasy finally realized.

Carry on with the hate.

Oh, and fuck the Duchy of Grand Fenwick.

And that goes double for Freedonia.