I ordered the new Pratchett (The Night Watch) from Britan about 4 weeks ago ('cause it has a cover by wosshisname: not the cartoony guy, the one who did The Last Hero and the American cover sucks and the beauty of a book is part of the fun of it.) Anyway, Amazon.co.uk said it shipped out on the 4th (right on schedule) and that it would be here by the 11th through the 13th.
And it’s not!
Normally, I would just wait. Y’know? It’ll get here eventually.
But these fucktards are keeping me from the new Pterry Pratchett book!
Bastards. Hanging’s too good for them.
I’m sure that all Dopers, even the anti-death penalty ones would agree that in this one, a special exception should be made. And that exception should involve not boiling oil (which would be over far too quickly), but slowly simmering oil. And a catheter.
And to the inevitable half-wit who come along and say “Well, if that’s your worst problem, that you’re a day late getting a book you want, they you need a life”, fuck you too.
I hate the bloody postal system. I ordered a DVD from Sam Goody back in July… didn’t fucking get it till middle of September. I also recall posting something about it on another board, just to be bitched at for “not being empathetic towards the troubles of the ever-suffering postal service and to be glad” that it got to me at all. GRRRR…
“priority mail” should not take 3 months to get ANYWHERE.
You’ve insulted my employer. If your package was shipped via UPS or Fed-Ex, you should be able to find the shipping number in your amazon.com order history and click on it to determine exactly where that package is. If the package was shipped Fed-Ex and was not delivered when promised, I’ll pay your shipping charges.
Hence the “royal mail” business in the title. And either they don’t have tracking numbers in general or I’m a special case. Either way there’s no tracking number on my order whatsoever.
I have no idea what happens to it once it hits the US: whether it gets dumped in with the regular mail or it gets sent to one of the private carriers or what, hence the reason I’m attacking everyone who ever carried a parcel.
For that matter, add Wells Fargo and The Pony Express to the title too.
I don’t care who done it, there’s even a thread about the new Pterry book in CS and I can’t participate 'cause I don’t have my copy. I’m ranting and tarring groups unfairly. Such is the nature of The Pit. And it’s morally right to do so 'cause I don’t have my new Pratchett book, and it’s a day late and I wanna read it, dammit.
Fenris
PS: Anyone remember that Calvin and Hobbes sequence where Calvin is waiting for the propeller-beanie cap? I didn’t write it of course, but if I had, it woulda been autobiographical.
A. **Pfenris ** is absolutely correct about Pterry–that what his fans–including me–call him.
B. I’m pissed, too, because I placed my order with the Science Fiction Book Club for Night Watch back in October, and it’s still not here. On the other hand, the new Harry Turtledove what-if-the-Spanish-Armada-had succeeded-and-conquered England novel came today, so I’m mollified for now. But the new Pterry had better come PDfuckin’Q, or I’m going to go totally Bursar on someone. (Dried frog pills, anyone?)
Whew, I’m glad I’m not the only person who’s ready to go on a killing spree at the Science Fiction Book Club headquarters if I don’t see a package waiting for me real soon …
Oh, Fenris,, I sympathize completely! (And a catheter? Brilliant. Simply brilliant. The New York Times raves “A stellar new twist on an old torture! Fenris DOES IT AGAIN!”)
As someone who checked the UPS site 3 times a day when waiting for a shipment of 8 brand-new books which I was desperately excited about, I feel your pain. (My husband got very tired of hearing where my books were at that very moment.)
It’s STILL not here. (Of course, it’s 6:30 am, and the mail doesn’t usually get here until about 2:00 pm, but so what?)
ALL PACKAGE CARRIER TYPES (except my buddy who works for the post office…erm…and any postal/package carrier Dopers or their loved ones) MUST DIE! (Or at least be tortured. Rub 'em with sandpaper and stuff salt-encrusted anchovies in the wounds for starters.)
