Indoor use only in our case, usually it’s the two or three-year-olds who find the leaf blowers scary, the work is done early in the a.m. before they get out to play. I appreciate the reminder though, it’s easy to overlook such things.
I have to say Spectre of Pithecanthropus that was a great impression of a leaf-blower in the OP, nicely done.
I am TOTALLY behind this rant and wish I had written it myself. With me it starts out subliminal–I don’t notice the droning din until the pain in my temples arches upward and I realize the asshole nextdoor has been doing whatever the hell he does with that fucking loud-ass contraption for 45 minutes. His yard is not that big!
I’d create an anology about the penis length of gentlemen who use leaf blowers and those who rake, but I’ve had an extra vodka gimlet tonight, and am not up to it. Help, anyone?
45 minutes? FORTY-FIVE LOUSY MINUTES? You wimp.
My across the street neighbor routinely runs his high-pitched whining leaf blower for NINE HOURS. I have bought him a rake. I have even offered to rake his yard for him. I have politely requested that he let me know he’s going to do this a day ahead of time so I can plan to be elsewhere. I have called the cops (“sorry lady, it’s not a nuisance until after 9pm.”).
I told a friend about this and he figuratively patted me on the head and assured me it couldn’t be THAT bad. Then he came over one afternoon to help me with a computer problem and he said, “What the hell? What is that horrible noise? It’s been going non stop since I got here!” I said, “THAT is the leafblower guy! He’s been at it for two hours already!” My friend said, “Are you fucking kidding me? You listened to that for nine hours? And didn’t kill him?” Half an hour later, Leafblower Guy was still at it, and my friend said, “I can’t stay here, seriously, that noise is going to make my head explode. You poor thing.”
I want to stuff the leafblower up my neighbor’s backside and inflate him until he pops.
Ah, OP, you missed the good days of the gardeners’ strike in California (maybe it was just on the Monterey Peninsula). I was so happy that they did a partial strike: they just quit using leaf blowers for the duration of the strike. It was wonderful!
Did the answer specify a male? If not, did the dude get credit for the answer after the judges reviewed it during the commercial break?
That would require bending. I bet that’s a challenge for him. Plus, weeding is a highly detailed activity whereas the Basic Blow is a vague activity. It looks and sounds Far More Workey than the quiet pulling of weeds. There’s a method to his madness!
I hate noise, but, I have leaves and clippings. The answer for me was to buy a Black & Decker electric leaf blower. Rechargeble, cordless, light and convenient. Also whisper quiest. I’ve asked, and it never bothers anyone.
Maybe you can put one under your neighbor’s Christmas tree?
People who use leafblowers should be shot.
And then eaten.
Especially fat men who need the exercise more than they need to prance around with noise polluting toys.
My next door neighbor has his blowing at least once a week. He was about five feet from my back home office the other day not only using the stupid thing but wearing earphones to block out the noise.
Hello? If you don’t want to hear it, guess what? I don’t want to either. I cranked up my Bach CD really loudly and gave him the finger from my window.
I also have an electric weed trimmer and a rotary mower.
Did I mention I hate noise?
Leafblowers are passive/aggressive devices. Those neighbors that are so full of themselves they have to scream “I’M DOING MY LAWN NOW!”
Perhaps I’m bitter … The neighbor that blows the leaves on his tiny yard also felt the need to call the police, multiple times, because my son’s skateboarding was “too loud.” Police sided with neighbor. Skateboards = too loud at any time. Leafblower = fine before 9:00 pm.
On our street, raking is looked at as an old fashioned eccentricity, like clotheslines. My husband was outside raking last fall. He sort of likes raking. Says it clears his mind. Our yard is .75 acres, so not a unreasonable size for raking.
The neighbors were concerned.
Why are you raking? Don’t you have a leafblower? Would you like to borrow my leafblower?
We have a leafblower, given to us secondhand by a well meaning relative. We prefer to rake.
I was all set to hate the gas powered trimmer he bought. I must admit to enjoying its superior weed thrashing abilities compared to the electric we had. I wear earplugs.
Am I the only one that just mows over the leaves and leaves them there? And besides, if the leaves are in the backyard, who gives a shit if they’re there? No one can see them.
I hate yardwork.
In Doperland, where every man has a large penis, nobody drives an SUV except those that use them for hauling horse trailers over mountain passes every day, and nobody talks on cell phones in public, nobody owns a leaf blower either.
Except me. Sorry, but I’ve got two mature oaks and a mature ash in the front yard, and a literal forest in my back yard. Really, it’s a half acre of woods, the leaves of which all end up on the lawn and patio in my back yard. I rake debris from storms and try to mulch as many leaves into the lawn as possible with the mower, but for fall cleaning, I have to somehow corral hundreds of pounds of leaves back into the woods. (I prefer having the leaves decompose in the woods, providing nutrients to the soil, rather than hauled off to the landfill in yard bags. The leaf blower is a must if I’m not going to spend the good portion of two weekends on leaf clearing.
No, it isn’t. Ever hear of a rake? :rolleyes:
And since this is the Pit, fuck you and your stupid fucking noise maker. It’s people like you who are degrading the quality of life wherever you go.
You got that right. He works a bit over at the golf course across the street. He does something with a riding mower. Well, last month, we had a really bad storm and there were trees down all over the course. His boss called and said, we don’t need you to cut grass (ie, sit on a riding mower for several hours), but we really need help cutting up and hauling away these downed trees. Neighbor told me he doesn’t do that–if he can’t ride the mower, he won’t work. So much for helping out.
Apparently he lost his job (I didn’t know this) and that is one reason he’s out there twice a week. No, I still don’t like him. I hope he gets a job, though–that would cut down on the noise (and we are entering leaf blowing season) a bit.
We got rid of our leaf blower a few years ago. We use a rake or just use the mower on them. Neighbor has been seen blowing them into our yard. Luckily, most of our strong winds come from the northwest and he is directly east of us…
Here’s a great big WTF for you!
The idiot woman next door got one of those things a couple of years ago and, despite the fact that she knows I work nights, runs the damn thing almost every day.
One day, after being rudely awakened, I said to my wife,“Doesn’t that idiot know what a water hose, rake, or broom is for?”
Her reply was," She just got done with the hose. Most of the time , she uses the blower to dry off the pavement she’s just washed. Sometimes, she sweeps, isn’t satisfied with the results and runs into the house for the blower instead of re-sweeping."
BTW, on this particular day, rain was forecast and distant thunder could be occasionally heard over the blower’s din.
As Victor Meldrew would put it,“Oh for the love of God! I just don’t believe it!”
You go rake a half acre of wooded yard, you numbskull. I also own a home on over half an acre of wooded area, and while I don’t own a leafblower, I don’t blame those that do. My lawn tractor mulches the leaves, but it makes noise as I cut my lawn, too. Sue me.
You obviously rent. Tough luck, dealing with someone else doing your yardwork that is. No reason to get all snarky about responsible owners of blowers. I don’t get up early, either. Is it OK if I make noise in the middle of the day, or is that too much for your precious ears?
To me, the thrumming sound of multiple mowers/weedeaters/blowers running during the afternoon hours of a weekend day is the music of people in my neighborhood caring for their property, nothing more or less.
This may be a stupid question, but why don’t they put mufflers on the damn things? If we can silence a MP5, we should be able to silence a leaf blower.
Unless you’re the guy down the street from me who feels that he just can’t abide either leaves on his lawn OR dirty street gutters, and walks up and down the street cleaning them out, all the time with this “I’m really cool” look on his face. Of course he also owns a Hummer, so I’m not surprised. I’d like to jam the goddamn thing up his ass and inflate him to the size of a dirigible.