I was talking to an employee one time:
Me “What happened next?”
Him “It spread like wildflowers!”
I think he meant wildfire, but it kindasorta made sense to me. 
I was told yesterday I had to watch that new documentary
Ice, with Dave Edinbugh.
I’m fairly sure David Attenborough’s programme was called ‘Frozen Planet’, but hey, almost one out of three ain’t bad.
I knew a guy in the military who always said “human cry” instead of “hue and cry”. A coworker once wrote me about somebody acting like a “pre madonna”. Would that be Debbie Harry?
I had a Sergeant in the army who always said " I could care less". We pointed out the error of his ways but sure didn’t make any up points with him!
My dad is not a Hoosier, he’s from southern california and lived his entire life in southern Oregon.
Here’s some more:
“Drew, these cinnanom cookies you made are great!”
“Have you listened to the new **alvum **by Aerosmith?”
I understood most of it except for the incest part.
An old friend had a few of these, but the only one I can remember right now is ‘adage’. He said it “uh-DODGE”.
I often witness the malapropism of pronouncing bistro as bi-stroh.
used in place of “inset” - referring to an intentionally depressed portion of the floor that was waiting to be filled with a patch.
What I truly love about this guy, and honestly, i do like the guy, is that he uses these words consistently, every single time something spins, it has “spunt”, every time something swells, it has “swolled”, etc. We both get a kick out of it because he kinda knows it’s the wrong word, but he just doesn’t care enough to change it, and I don’t care enough to give him a hard time, so we both just laugh. He laughs at me because I must look funny when I start laughing about it.
So all you anti-grammar-nazi nazis can just calm down. I’m looking for more funny and FUN mispronunciations because if you can’t have fun in your life, even with silly things like this, then you may be taking life too seriously. 
I’ve got no problem until people are called ‘dumb’ because they mispronounce something.
He probably thinks it’s french, like frommage for cheese or something. People constantly mispronounce my last name - for absolutely no reason. I have two n’s and two t’s yet they often say “benet” like in JonBenet (that poor little girl that died) and it makes me think…I wonder if when they say my name wrong it makes them think of that poor little girl? I also wonder if perhaps they’ve never heard of the singer Tony Bennett. My last name’s just like that, spelled the same and everything. So it’s not exactly uncommon.
Ouch. Who’s calling people dumb? That’s silly. Dumb means can’t speak literally. 
You seem to have been pricked on your last nerve by something. Sure hope it wasn’t me. I’m just here trying to spread the good cheer of laughing at legitimately funny stuff. For reals, yo. 
I work for a medical supply company, so I hear crazy stuff all the time. My two favorites: carafe (car-a-fay) and ibuprofen (eye-bee-you-profen).
Over time I’ve encountered several people who pronounce oyster as “orster”. Could this be some sort of regionalism (possibly southern)?
Another is “Bamuda” for Bermuda.
What if they aren’t always properly understood?
Here the term used literally in reference to mispronunciation.
Everybody who never mispronounced anything please raise you hands.
Me!
I did not say people that mispronounce words are dumb, just that them mispronouncing things may indicate this to people. Do you disagree?
You come into this thread saying:
I think this is borderline thread shitting and I also disagree that getting others to understand what you mean is the only standard that should be applied to pronunciation, and that as long as another speaker understood the word you were trying to pronounce, you did not mispronounce it. While clearly language is an evolving thing and what may be perceived as incorrect now may be perfectly acceptable usage later (or the other way around), I think people take this fact to a whole new level by proactively applying it to any mistake that people make. Just because it might one day be perfectly acceptable usage to say nucular does not mean that it is now. And to argue against ‘nucular’ as well as other examples in this thread being mispronunciation is, in my mind, not accurate from a descriptive language point of view, since clearly there are dominant standards that people are failing to adhere to, but moreover does a disservice to the mispronouncer, as it reinforces them in patterns that to others may label them as dumb. As it happens, they might not be dumb at all, but it is what they have to contend with, unforturnately.
Sorry, got pulled away. That’s my only problem, grammar nazis who assume mispronunciation is an indication of a person’s intelligence.
Otherwise, I think ‘all intensive porpoises’ is hilarious.
Yep, it is. And we (country people) are used to being thought of as dumb.
My own mispronounciation: coming to English as a second language, there’s a bunch of words I read well before I heard them spoken, especially in those naughty SF paperbacks my parents never read (thankfully!) that I devoured as a kid.
For the longest time, I couldn’t figure out what the hell were a woman’s “thigs” rhymes with figs, which is, of course how I thought you said “thighs”…
Coming at it from the spoken direction:
I called that small sidewalk like thing by the side of the road the “curve” for the longest time, wondering why it was still called that when it was straight…
Hail Marys in English had me thinking those Anglos were a little mixed up on biology when they referred to the “fruit of thy wound”…(Father, Jesus wasn’t born by Cesarean, was he?)
And more of a mistranslation, I still collect my share of blank looks when I ask waiter for the “note” (the bill…)