Some-ones mobile phone went off during my Fathers funeral. Not just a tone but one of those silly little tunes. I kind of broke the tension for me and I’m sure my dad would have smiled.
I remember at the grave site the Funeral Director being paranoid that we would drop the coffin as it was lowerd into the grave.
My sister, mother and father went out of state to my uncle’s funeral (I was a continient away at the time), leaving my sister’s boyfriend to watch the house and feed the bird. We were not particularly close to Uncle Tony and that side of the family, but went out of family obligations. The morning of the funeral, my sister calls home and BF informs her that her beloved pet parrot had died suddenly that morning. My sister was upset and cried the whole day (louder than anyone close to my uncle), and ended up being comforted by everyone that “Uncle Tony was in heaven” “we know how you feel”, blah blah blah when she was really crying for her bird.
As for me, I went to a wake for my co-worker’s sister. I walked into the funeral home for the viewing, and his sister (the deceased) and I were wearing the same dress. :eek:
Try going to a funeral in Sun City AZ. Everyone there is deaf.
Years ago my Grandfather passed away and we all flew in for the funeral. We’re sitting there listening to the pastor give the eulogy and began noticing that many of the people attending the funeral had no idea what the guy was saying.
At one point, the pastor asked for a moment of silence in respect for Grandad. We all oblige, lowered our heads, and started saying a small prayer to ourselves. An older gentleman sitting a few rows back, turns to his wife, and in a loud voice, says, “Haah!?! What did he say!?!”. Completely broke the moment. I had a hard time controlling my laughter after hearing that.
On that same trip- Golf in Sun City is the all consuming passion of retirees’. Seeing as it was winter where I lived at the time, I wanted to enjoy some sun while I was there.
I went to the golf club up the street to hit a couple buckets of balls and unwind (Grandfather would have been proud of me). As I’m swinging away, I notice a couple of gentlemen next to me discussing their friend. Again, seeing as their all deaf, it wasn’t too hard to hear what they were talking about. One guy says to his friend, “Ya know, I think Henrys’ taking a turn for the worse and is pretty much home bound now.” Without a seconds thought, his friend blurts out, “Damn!! Well there goes our foresome now!” I had to turn away to laugh. I never realized it must be a bitch to keep a foresome together for any length of time down there.
I giggled like a maniac through my best friend’s funeral. I was in the back of the church standing with my back to another really good friend of mine, who stood with his arms around my shoulders. Behind us and a bit to the right was my mother, my sister, and my sister’s friend, sitting on the back pew. Every once in a while I would turn around, tears streaming down my face, poke my friend in the ribs, giggle, look at my family, giggle some more, then turn my attention back to the front. I think it was a mixture of denial that my friend was even dead, nervousness because that’s just the way churches make me feel, dread because I wouldn’t see my friend tomorrow, and the retarded pastor trying to convince all the young people there that we should attend his church next Sunday. The friend that I was standing with had to take me outside to try to calm me down. It worked until, right when we got back inside, they closed the casket. Suddenly it all became real and I lost it. I didn’t stop crying for the rest of the day. I’m sure a good majority of the people there think I’m crazy. Oh well.
My father died quickly from a massive stroke. In addition to the shock and the need to make plans quickly, it was also the first time my sisters and I had been together in a couple of years. We held it together pretty well, but by the time we met to discuss plans for the memorial service, we were pretty slap-happy and wound up cracking jokes and recounting stupid stories while we were trying to discuss music selection and all the other details.
At least we were dignified during the actual service.
All I remember is the one from the movie “Priest”.
Priest: And what about music? Did he have a favourite song?
Wife of the deceased: looks horrified and turns to her son: Oh, no! We can’t! He’s going to be cremated!
Son: turns sheepishly to the priest: It was “Great Balls of Fire.”
screech, if it was within my power to award prizes, you’d get one for that! I’m having a bit of an icky day, and you made me laugh out loud, thank you 
my thanks rosebud, I can laugh about it now. (what, drive 30 miles back home and change?)
and dammit if she didn’t look better than I did in that dress.
A few years ago, when I was not quite so happy with my life, I used to make pithy comments about it when people ask how I am:
Q: How ya doin?
A: Well, I managed to get up this morning, so that’s progress…
etc.
At the funeral of one of my co-workers, the widow came over to me to greet me upon my arrival, saying “Thanks for coming, how are you?” and without thinking I said (no kidding):
“Well, I’m alive.”
It didn’t even hit me until about 5 minutes later why she had looked at me so strangely at that point.
That’s gotta be one of the most embarrassing things I ever did.
Have you heard the expression “He’d be late for his own funeral” ? Well, I know someone that was!!!
The grandfather of a good friend had died. In life, he was always joking, always in a good mood. He enjoyed helping others. And he knew how to have fun and how to make people laugh. In short, he was a good man.
On the way to the funeral, the hearse – with the body inside – had a flat tire. Everyone was at the cemetary waiting. His family got a laugh out of it: “That’s just like Irv…late to his own funeral!”
A friend of the family recently commited suicide. The suddeness of the death made it more difficult to take. Food aplenty was being delivered to the deceased’s house, so much so that we had to recruit help to take it all in. Another family friend, who was pressed into food duty, was so amazed at the size of a cooler someone brought by that she exclaimed “Geez, you could fit a body in that thing!”. She didn’t even realize what she had said until half the room doubled over in laughter. She wasn’t seen much the rest of the day…
There’s something about death that brings on severe foot-in-mouth syndrome. After my dad died, we were having a terrible time getting any information out of the cremation society that was SUPPOSED to have given us his ashes within three days. After a week of excuses, we discovered that they still hadn’t cremated him. When my brother called me to tell me that (and that he just couldn’t deal with it all anymore), I told him without thinking, “Don’t worry about it. I’ll call the company up and light a fire under them.”
accidentally cut into the driving procession of a funeral. Then when he left the line the people behind him continued to follow him. He had to speed and start making lots of turns to try to lose about 20 cars.
WHOAH! :eek: Did anyone notice this?
It had been about a year since my grandmother funeral, and I was accompanying my mother to make the last payment for the funeral, etc.
Well, other than the funeral, we had never been to this particular home, so we picked a good looking door, and tried to come in…
(those of you that are laughing, continue reading…)
Well the door we were trying was locked, and out of frustration (it was one of those* days) I kicked the door pretty hard, rattled it in it’s frames, shook the windows to either side… a nice kick, I’m surprised I didn’t break any of the glass…
A few moments after my kick, an elderly man opened the door.
We had rather rudely interupted his brothers viewing. If looks could kill, my entire little family would have died from this small handful of really really old people.
Very embarassing.
Yes, but no one said anything to me. They may have been being polite.
I can laugh now, and so will many other people. A friend is writing a play and he is including this episode as a minor but humorous scene.