Weekend At Bernie’s, when they staple Bernie’s toupee back on.
From The Impostors:
“I hate them.”
The whole scene where the two conmen are trying to get a free pastry in the bakery is to die for. Oliver Platt and Stanley Tucci at their finest.
From My Blue Heaven:
“You’re so hot, you could melt all dis stuff.”
Seeing the legs just stop in their tracks and rotate to face Steve Martin’s character was delish!
And, from TV’s The Simpsons:
One of the many scenes in which a family member has to choose whether to compromise their position for money, or return it. The scene I am thinking of is from the “Lil’ Lisa’s Industrial Slurry” eposode I believe. She had a check for millions of dollars. Someone asks her what she did with it. She replies that she tore it up.
Now, that’s not so funny in itself, but the angle of view they drew it in was pure genius. You see a low angle, drawn looking at Lisa’s Eye level. When she says she ddestroyed the check, behind her, you see only Homer’s legs, which just fall over out of the scene, as if he had passed out.
Pure subtle genius.
Life of Brian:
“You are all individuals!”
“Yes, Brian, we are all individuals!”
“I’m not!”
“Always look on the bright side of life,” at the end, on the crosses. I couldn’t stop laughing for hours after I first saw that one.
South Park, Bigger, Longer and Uncut:
Stan finds the clitoris. That was so unexpected, again, I just couldn’t stop laughing.
What, all these replies and not one mention of Clue?
My favorite scene is still Tim Curry counting bullets at the end…
In fact, I still can’t watch the movie without cracking up at least once.
One I forgot.
Joe vs. The Volcano
The wedding ceremony. The poem. The doctor’s office. But most especially, immortally… the job-quitting scene.
If you ever need the motivation to quit a job you hate, rent this movie. Watch it repeatedly. Then try really hard not to use the phrase “Suck… suck… suck!!!” when you go in to the boss’ office to quit the next day.
Life of Brian again -
The guy at the very back of the crowd can’t exactly hear what the prophet is saying. He seems quite puzzled by this:
“What’s he saying? Blessed be the cheesemakers? I think he must mean makers of all dairy products?”
Biggus Diccus (already mentioned, a classic)
Most of Galaxy Quest was a riot . . . but when Tim Allen is wolfing down prime rib while Alan Rickman is served broth with live spiders wriggling around – and he has to play along if it kills him, and deadpans “Just like mother used to make” – I truly lost it and laughed until tears ran down my face.
If I name all of my favorites, I’ll be here all day. But I will tell you two of them. They’re both from There’s Something About Mary.
Allow me to preface by saying that I work with people with developmental disabilities.
First, the scene where Ben Stiller meets Warren, (Mary’s mentally retarded brother). I have clients at work that are similar to Warren in regards to his behavior. When he beat up Ben Stiller for touching his ears…that was priceless. I’ve seen stuff like that happen.
Secondly, the scene where Matt Dillon tells Mary that, as one of his hobbies, “I like to work with the retards.” See, I get a lot of people ask me what it’s like to work with, “You know, that…um, type of person.” And they’ll say, “When they’re not at the workshop with you, where do you, like, keep them?” I’ve actually looked at people with a straight face and said, “In a large kennel. We have to let them out once in a while to use the bathroom though, because if they make ‘doo-doo’ in the cage, it’s a bitch to clean.” So his character’s attitude was the perfect example of the ignorance that my co-workers and I run into.
The scene in Baseketball where he drinks the fat that is lipsuctioned from Marlon Brando’s ass. I cannot help but ball my eyes out from laughing so damn hard.
The Producers.
The audition where the Actor sings “Love Power”. The scene where the Director wants to re-write the ending to World War II. “Our boys are losing!”
The Gold Rush.
Charlie Chaplin cooking and eating his shoe. With proper etiquette, of course.
The Life of Brian
“We’re not the Judean People’s Front! We’re the People’s Front of Judea!”
“I thought we were the Judean Populist Front…”
South Park
“Chef says I have to find the clitoris to get Wendy to like me.”
“Find the clitoris? Is that like finding Jesus?”
The Monster
Roberto Begnigni desparately trying to convince people that he’s not a serial killer, and only making things worse.
And another vote for the ransom scene in Ruthless People.
I saw it! My favorite part was when Slater goes into a gun store and says “I want a really big gun that holds a lot of bullets,” and the dealer looks at him and says “Bless you, child!”
Jim Carrey’s facial expressions, in just about every movie he does.
In “Private Parts,” when Howard Stern throws a frisbee at a retarded guy, who just stands there and lets it hit him in the face. Later he hits Howard in the back of the head with it.
In “Top Secret,” the scene where an out-of-control Jeep just…barely…touches a Ford Pinto, and the Pinto explodes.
I’m not going to tell you the whole scene, because it comes from a little watched movie that everybody should see.
Quick Change. When they are first looking for directions to the airport, they ask a guy on a bike with a shovel in his hand for directions. They are then witness to one of the funniest scenes in any movie ever.
“It’s bad luck just seeing a thing like that!”
Watch the damn movie. You won’t be disappointed.
From “The In-Laws”, when they’re in a crowded diner at lunchtime loudly discussing Peter Falk’s character Vince Riccardo’s involvment in the Bay of Pigs.
“What’s that inscription on the portrait of President Kennedy in your office, ‘At least we tried’?”
“That’s about the Bay of Pigs.”
“You were involved in the Bay of Pigs?”
“It was my idea!”
And from “Raiders of the Lost Ark”, when Indiana Jones shoots the guy waving the sword around.
If I’m not mistaken, I’ve seen it - in the theater, no less. Bill Murray, Geena Davis, and Randy Quaid? The clown? Is that the one I’m thinking of?
We were watching Fletch last night - the doctor scene. “I don’t have any.” “No children?” “No elephant books.”
Animal House: During the road trip when they end up at the bar where everyone is black: “Do you mind if we dance wif’ yo dates?”
Happy Gilmore: When grandma checks into the nursing home: “You can trouble me for a warm glass of SHUT-THE-HELL-UP! Now, you will go to sleep or I will PUT you to sleep. Check out the nametag - you’re in my world now, grandma.”
Office Space: The whole 10 minutes at the beginning tracing Peter’s arrival at work, sitting at his cubicle, being irritated by co-workers, bosses, receptionists, etc. Hits too close to home for most of us, but is great to laugh at.
Groundhog Day: When Bill Murray realizes he’s living the same day ove and over again. When he bumps into the irritating insurance salesmen, instead of trying to dodge him he makes a gay overture towards him.
Clerks: just about anything in that movie. “Try not to suck any dick on the way to the parking lot.” “Did you ever notice that all the prices end in 9? Man that’s eerie.” “Cute cat, what’s his name? Annoying Customer.”
Porky’s: The scene where Lassie gets turned on. When Tommy Turner gets his penis grabbed on the other side of the wall by Beulah Ballbreaker (you have to see the movie to understand that). In the principal’s office when Beulah is trying to convince him that she could identify the ‘perpetrator’ from that incident, the gym teacher in the background’s comment “We could put up wanted signs all over the school, and hire a sketch artist. 'Have You Seen This Prick?”
Far too many more to mention that deserve to be mentioned…
The funniest scene that I have ever seen would have to be from American Pie.
When he is getting off in his bedroom, and his mother and father walk in…
Mom:“I think he is trying to watch some illegal channels
Dad: “those aren’t illegal the reception is just scrambled”
TV: “spank my hair ass”
Dad: " Excuse me”
Defending Your Life w/ Albert Brooks: Too many funny scenes to mention.
The Princess Bride: The scene where Iñigo Montoya and Fezzik rhyme back and fourth whilst annoying Vizzini.
Demolition Man has many hilarious scenes, but the best has to be the sequence in the police headquarters where John Spartan finds out he cannot use the “three seashells.” His solution to the problem is, um, unique.
The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly where Tuco (Eli Wallach) is trying to convince Blondie (Clint Eastwood) to tell him where the gold is. Despite all his efforts, Wallach is so not getting anywhere.
The scene in The Big Sleep where Bogart convinces Bacall not to call the police. I think it’s actually funnier than the “horse-racing” scene.
The scene from A Fish Called Wanda where John Cleese is dancing around naked and speaking Russian…and then the family walks in…
In “<b>The In-Laws</b>” when <b>Peter Falk tricks Alan Arkin</b> into helping in Carribean espionage.
When rebels shoot at them on the tarmac he yells “Serpentine! Serpentine!” to make Arkin dodge the bullets. No one could stop laughing.