Ooh the Niles’ Valentine Episode was good.
Also the ep where Martin has to pretend to be gay, and Niles walks in, becoming Martin’s “boyfriend.” 
The “Seinfeld” barber one was really good too…Oh there are so many!
Since no one has referenced Friends yet, I’d like to throw forth the trivia contest scenes from “The one with the Embryos.” The first one is probably the best one.
Here’s another vote for the Thanksgiving episode of The Bob Newhart Show, when Bob, Jerry, Howard and Mr. Carlin are all drunk in Bob’s apartment.
Someone seeing this scene for the first time without being familiar with the characters wouldn’t find it so hilarious, but for someone who knew the characters seeing how they acted when they’d had too much booze was awfully damn funny.
Mr. Carlin: “You know it’s a bad party when Elliot Carlin is the happiest guy in the room.”
Bob ordering Chinese food and slurring his name on the phone as “durr Bob Hartley. ‘D’ ‘R’ period. Durr.” was just priceless.
The single funniest thing I have ever seen on TV was the Mr. Bean Christmas special. I was stuck in a motel room in Socorro, NM, on a project, and two of us were literally gasping for air, falling on the floor during the scene where Mr. Bean went into the department store and started messing around with the Nativity figures, using them as action figures, bringing other toys in, etc. I laugh even now thinking about it, and I haven’t had a TV in years!
Come to think of it, almost anything Rowan Atkinson does is hilarious.
People have covered Fawlty Towers (must purchase the DVDs…) so I submit a Seinfeld moment not already mentioned.
The one where George is trying to collect unemployment and uses Jerry’s phone number as the fake Vandalay Latex company with whom he claims to have had an interview.
At the end George is in the bathroom when the phone rings and Kramer answers, prompting george to run out, pants around ankles, screaming, “Say Vandalay!!! Say Vandalay!!!” Kramer does not.
George trips and falls to the floor as Jerry enters, looks at him, and says with derision, “And you want to be my Latex salesman.”
Classic.
I just saw that a few weeks ago. The local PBS station is on their second run though, and I missed parts of some of the episodes the first time. I’m waiting for the one where Jeff gets to inadvertantly fulfill his lifelong ambition to run through a crowded airport yelling “Breasts! Breasts!” Great show, it’s like Seinfeld about sex.
I’m also hoping they’ll go through One Foot in the Grave again. I missed most of the last episode, but the part I saw was amazing.
There’s an episode of The Bob Newhart Show set at Halloween. One of Dr. Hartley’s patients is depressed and out on the ledge of a building threatening to jump; so Bob has to go out on the ledge and talk him down, in a Zorro costume. He finally convinces the patient to go inside, and the crowd below starts cheering. Bob looks down for a moment; then puts his hands on his hips, thrusts out his chest and strikes a pose. Then he turns around, draws a “Z” in the dirt on the window, and steps inside. Absolutely brilliant.
But the all-time funniest was an episode of Murder Most Horrid. It starts with Dawn French (from The Vicar of Dibley) as a distraught woman who gets a cheap hotel room where she plans to kill herself. She’s standing on a chair with the noose around her neck, when Amanda Donohoe, dressed in tight black leather, bursts through the door and crouches down aiming a sniper rifle out the window. She’s an assassin trying to kill a man who works in the building across the street. After a few misunderstandings, Amanda has Dawn wrapped with dynamite and will blow her up if she doesn’t go across the street and kill the man. She’s fitted out with all the assassin’s gear, a poison dart gun up her sleeve, and a tiny two way radio so Amanda can give her instructions. She talks her way past the security guard by saying that all he really needs is a blow job. She starts walking away and the guard is following her:
DAWN (into her radio): What’s a blow job?
AMANDA (incredulous): You don’t know what a blow job is?
DAWN: No, what is it?
AMANDA (exasperated): That’s oral stimulation of the genitals.
DAWN (disbelieving): Really!?
(Looks over her shoulder at the guard.)
DAWN: You wouldn’t think he could reach.
The bodies start piling up (Those poison dart guns can be tricky.), but the success seems to be lifting Dawn’s spirits. After she’s finished and left the building, she sees her mother on the sidewalk and rushes to embrace her; just as Amanda gets shot, falls on the plunger, and kaboom. I have got to see that show again.
There’s always something in every episode of Seinfeld that makes me laugh out loud, no matter how many times I’ve seen the episode. Some examples (not sure of the exact wording):
The “Nip” episode (Elaine’s exposed nipple on her personalized Christmas card). George complains that he didn’t get a card. Elaine: “You want a Christmas card? Here, here’s your Christmas card!” as she grabs his head and violently buries it in her bosomy region.
And later, to a co-worker who called her “Nip”: “You think that I’ve been exposed? It is not me who has been exposed, but YOU, for I have seen the nipple on your SOUL!”
“Where’s my fiancé? I can’t find my fiancé! Where’s my baby?”
“Maybe the dingo ate yo’ baybee.”
“What?”
“The dingo ATE YO’ BAY-BEE!”
The marble rye and fishing pole…
George driving Mr. & Mrs. Ross to his house in the Hamptons (or wherever) and finally admitting he didn’t have one. “Oh, we knew that.”
When George does the opposite of his every instinct and lands the job with the Yankees, and meanwhile Elaine loses her job and is sitting in the diner all decrepit.
Elaine: “You know what this means, don’t you?”
Jerry: “Don’t say it!”
Elaine: “I’m George! I’ve become George!”
Another one from Frasier.
Frasier gave his dad an electric shaving-cream warmer, which warms a standard size can of shaving cream. Niles is depressed about something, and goes into the hall bathroom. All of a sudden we hear a loud BANG!
Martin: “Oh my god, no!”
Niles: (Comes out of the bathroom, covered in shaving cream.)
Martin: “Huh. My shaving cream warmer must have caused the can of shaving cream to explode.”
Daphne: “He was a detective ya know!”
The look on Niles’ face exiting the bathroom, enjtire body covered with shaving cream, is priceless.
The Friends episode in which Brooke Shields guest-starred as a psycho obsessed with Joey’s “Days Of Our Lives” character.
The ending exposé was priceless – after Joey is exposed as Drake’s evil twin Hans, Rachel and Monica pipe up with how dastardly Hans also fooled them, and toss water in his face. Joey takes it all with remarkable aplomb, until Erica’s out the door, then turns back to the rest of the gang… “All right. You with the water…”
The best moment ever came from Cheers. Sam and Diane are in his office having one of their patented knock-down, drag-out fights. Right in the middle of it, Sam flings open the door, and every square inch of the door frame, from bottom to top, is filled with someone’s face, as everyone in the bar came over to listen. It’s made 10 times funnier by the fact that it’s totally unexpected.
My favorite News Radio moment is kind of obscure. It’s the episode where Lisa’s having her first week as the boss, and each day goes worse than the one before. For one of the staff meetings, she tries to get things off on a good note by bringing in this unbelieveably extravagent selection of pastries that she learned how to bake herself. No one pays attention to what she’s trying to say as they’re all blown away by the food. Then, (I’m getting to the moment, I swear) Joe, the big tough electrician guy (played by the guy who now hosts Fear Factor) takes a bite from a pie and says, “Wow, she even infused the merangue with an insouciant hint of lemon zest,” which cracks me up every time.
But it gets better. Moments later, Dave takes a bite and says, “Wow, is that lemon zest?” Joe comes walking by and says, “You know it, dude.”
The Seinfeld episode where George and Jerry snag a limo at the airport by pretending to be someone else and after they get in the car it turns out the car is for the head of a Nazi/Aryan Nation type organization. The Nazi types in the limo are thrilled to see their hero in the flesh for the first time and start asking George questions about his book which details the evils of Jews and Blacks.
The ending where the limo arrives at it’s destination and the Nazi’s realize they’ve been duped and start pulling out guns and then suddenly an angry mob of anti-Nazi Prostesters see the limo an attacks it with George and Jerry trapped inside with the Nazi’s who are now panic stricken is priceless.
That episode gets my vote, funniest thing I ever saw on TV. There was also this exchange, paraphrased from memory:
Roseanne: Gee, is he really doing that? But he’s so young!
Dan: Maybe he’s gifted…
I don’t think I ever laughed so hard at anything from TV.
YES! Slow Donny!!
I have to agree with you, Dooku. That’s my personal favorite as well. I had tears rolling down my face by the end of that episode.
“No Donny, it’s MAGIC!”
Too bad the rest of the show isn’t that funny.
Frasier keeps getting mentioned, so why not again?
I’m thinking of the episode where he’s attempting to convince some possible girlfriend that his family is Jewish. There’s various hijinks involving hiding Christmas trees, etc. At one point, Niles shows up, costumed as Jesus for a play, and bursts out of the bathroom (Christmas tree involved somehow or other) at entirely the wrong moment.
There was just something about the scene and the way in which Frasier exploded, “JESUS CHRIST!” For a moment or three I thought I was going to die.
In no particular order:
Previously mentioned Fawlty Towers - the Germans. “You started it!” “No, you started it! You invaded Poland!”
Previously mentioned Dick van Dyke - Laura opens the package addressed to Rob. The genius of this episode is that even though it unfolds exactly the way Rob wrote the comedy sketch so we know exactly what’s going to happen, it’s hilarious anyway. MTM has mentioned this as one of her favorite episodes because she did comedy as opposed to always being the rational one.
Nobody’s mentioned Lucy yet? Tsk, tsk. The episode where she meets William Holden while she’s wearing the fake nose. I think this has the edge over the candy factory.
The Honeymooners - Ed Norton addresses the golf ball.
Exactly Greywolf73. They achieved some sort of Zen with that one episode, then went back to mediocrity again. They even had David Cross back for another Donny episode, and it was just as average as the rest. I would buy that episode off eBay.
How is it no one’s mentioned The Simpsons yet? I thought no SDMB thread was complete without a Simpsons quote.
I am a sucker for their musical episodes. My favorite is probably Stop the Planet of the Apes, I Want to Get Off!, starring Troy McClure.
TMcC: I hate every ape I see, from Chimpan-A to Chimpanzee. You’ll never make a monkey, no you’ll never make a monkey out of meeeeeee!!!
Statue of Liberty rises out of the stage.
TMcC: Oh my god, I was wrong.
It was Earth, all along.
Dr. Zaius, I love you!
Also, Marge in Oh, Streetcar!.
Flanders: Stella,
Can’t you hear me yell-a?
STELLA!
Well that’s because there are too many Simpsons moments- we’ve had threads dedicated to the greatness that is Simpsons. Whole threads!!
The episode of “Frasier” where they dig up their old house (rented- belongs to the landlord) because they belive he killed his wife and buried her under the floorboards is wonderful. The moment when they see their old “Hamlet” program and realize that the skull they’ve found is just a prop is priceless!! The look on their faces…And all of their “Crane Boys Mystery” references, also funny.
Also, the scene from the Christmas episode where Frasier has to sneak back into a diner…ah, you had to be there. I only actually saw that moment and it was great in and of itself. So funny.
As for “Cheers” I’m fond of the episode where Lillith’s lab rat dies and she puts it in her purse to bury later on. Frasier finds it and thinks she’s dealing in an unhealthy fashion, and so throws it out. Towards the end, they’re at an interview for a pre-school for little Freddy…
Lillith>: Oh what are those?
Interview Lady>: This is our class rat who’s just given birth, would you like to see?
Lillith>: They look just like Whitey…
Interview Lady>: Who’s Whitey?
Lillith>: Oh, he was my favorite rat…that this bastard took and threw in the trash.
The way she said it was just great.
I too find NewsRadio very funny and well done. One of the funniest scenes I’ve ever seen in any show was the episode Super Karate Monkey Death Car, where Jimmy James does a public reading of his autobiography after it’s been translated from English to Japanese back to English.
Absolutely hilarious.
I second that. I like how Barney’s hair becomes more and more frazzled as he struggles to remember.
From Blackadder III where Blackadder torments Samuel Johnson, who’s just finished a dictionary, by complimenting him with made-up words. Something like:
“You’ve completed your exhaustive dictionary. How splendid. Please allow me to express my heartfelt conflabulations.”