How about it, Teeming Millions? We used to have a cat “Sugar” who always wanted us to “play sponge”: she had a Swiss cheese-shaped wedge of sponge rubber she would bring to us to throw across the room, then she would bring it back for us to throw again. 
My cat brought home a little rabbit through the cat door!
He also got in a mess of seed ticks and brought them home,too. Not too damn funny.
Darn…I thought this was about CatDogs. 
Catdogs? Have you seen one, Cristi?
I think this is appropriate here
SPECIFICATIONS
Standard input
- bilateral frontal whisker array
- bilateral adjustable audio dishes (range 20-20,000Hz),
- stereoscopic scanning device, with night vision
- Velcro™ flavor sampling device/energy collector
- twin front-mounted odor sampling devices.
Standard output:
- internally mounted purrbox
- single speaker with separate growl mode
- rear-mounted, fully-jointed semaphore device.
Processor:
- parallel neuron array with Random Access Memory
- autonomic control of system software.
Included Hardware:
- calcium-based skeletal structure
- byte-to-bit conversion array
- retractable document shredder/hole punch
- pawpad printer
- mouse (standard catnip). Also included: natural fiber protective
covering in various colors
SYSTEM SOFTWARE
Your PC will come preloaded with one of the following:
DOS (domestic shorthair)
OS (other shorthair)
MS (megasoft, installed in units with fuzzy covering)
Conversion to Eunuchs can be done by a simple operation. This is
recommended to prevent the proliferation of cheap PC clones.
Bundled Software may include the following: Mortal Kombat, Acrobat,
Explorer, and Stuffit Expander.
Your PC will automatically convert from laptop to desktop as needed.
There are no user-serviceable parts inside.
OPERATING YOUR PC
To start up your PC, push the power button (on any electric can opener).
Your PC has an energy-saving mode known as Sleep. Your PC will Sleep
automatically if unused for a short period of time, or you may invoke the
Sleep mode by placing your PC in a soft, warm area. To wake your PC
From Sleep you may press the power button as in Start, shake the mouse, or
Tap any of the PC’s input devices (see specs).
To perform a Warm Boot: Remove your shoe, then tap the PC gently with
your toes.
To perform a Cold Boot: Same technique as for Warm Boot, but leave your
shoe on.
To Reboot: Repeat the Warm Boot.
Cleaning your PC: Use only mild soap and water, no solvents. Surface
wash only. Total immersion is not recommended. If partial immersion is
necessary, wear proper hand and face protection and make sure your PC is
fully dry when finished.
Compatability and Networking: Your PC is designed to independently
Assess compatibility with other PCs.
Running Eunuchs will generally give your PC greater compatibility with
other PCs. It may be necessary to install a firewall between incompatible
PCs as each may attempt to breach the other’s security systems.
Compatible PCs may share thermal energy and cleaning tasks and may network
for gaming purposes.
Please note that your PC will be incompatible with units of type BIRD and
FISH, unless appropriate security measures (such as a firewall) are
installed. Your PC may tolerate one or more DOG units provided they
occupy a subordinate position within the hierarchical structure.
Power Requirements: Alternating supply of canned cat food and dry cat
food. Direct supply of water. Direct access to solar and thermal energy
sources.
TROUBLESHOOTING
PC has difficulty exiting … perform a Warm Boot.
PC shares files from dinner/table/plates without permission: Boot your
PC prior to running food-related software.
PC Hangs Up Phone During Connection to ISP: Try invoking sleep mode
Prior to connecting to ISP. Otherwise, perform a Warm Boot.
PC Is Frozen: PC is probably scanning for small life forms. Reboot
until it responds.
Deleted Material Not Going to Trash or Recycling Bin: reprogram
preferences in PC sys/litter box/deposit/target.aim
The reason gentlemen prefer blondes is that there are not enough redheads to go around.
Forgot to mention: PC = Personal Cat
Inigo is a funny little cat. He will fetch a rabbit-fur covered toy mouse the way Sugar would fetch the cheese for you, dougie, and he will scramble frantically (leaping over sofas, running into walls, etc.) to try to catch it before it hits the ground.
He will also take one of those mice and play fetch with himself. He’ll take it to the linoleum (sp?) kitchen floor, bat it all the way across and chase after it, then…pick it up in his mouth, carry it back to where the linoleum first starts, and do it all over again.
My favorite, though, is the “Big Bad Cat” game. If he’s in an obnoxious mood, he’ll charge me when I enter the living room: back arched (and hair sticking straight up–a perfect ridgeback!), tail fluffed to full volume, ears back, and literally rearing up on his hind legs as he leaps toward me. Turns out that’s his invitation for me to chase him–if I take three steps toward him, he fluffs up bigger, runs away, then comes back at me again–not running, but bouncing. He signals he wants to quit when he seeks shelter under the coffee table.
He’s greatly entertaining company!
“Me fail English? That’s unpossible!”
“English? Who needs that? I’m never going to England.”
Dougie, I have a CatDog on my TV right now! He’s running a dogsled race…
He’ll fall off!
“If you drive an automobile, please drive carefully–because I walk in my sleep.”–Victor Borge
Oooooh, Laura, can your cat come over and play with my cat?
Our oldest cat picks up her dry food and puts it in the water bowl, lets it soak and then eats it.
Once he managed to tuck the water bowl under the corner of the carpet without spilling. Wish I’d seen him do that (wish I’d videotaped it).
The younger cat will play fetch with a crumpled (empty) cigarette pack.
Older cat perches on the bed rail (about an inch wide) while I’m making the bed – wouldn’t it be easier to just get off and back on?
Dougie, have I just not had enough coffee today, or have you just not seen Catdog on Nickelodeon? It’s funny, in a dippy way.
No, Cristi. We don’t have Cable TV. It’s a long story.
“If you drive an automobile, please drive carefully–because I walk in my sleep.”–Victor Borge
My cat is trying to type right now! They hate it when I’m at the computer. They’ll be standoffish all day, but sit down and start typing, and they’re all over me.
Did anyone else see that (embarassed to admit watching this) America’s Funniest with the cat that says “no” while being bathed?
See it? I * taped * it!! And with closed-captioning yet!!
“If you drive an automobile, please drive carefully–because I walk in my sleep.”–Victor Borge
My dog, Amos (a Rottie) has a huge tire he plays with. He picks it right up and tosses it over his head (around his neck) and prances around the yard with it. It’s his very favorite toy.
My other Dog, Yoda (a Shar-Pei) is “sexually attracted” to Amos (both boys). Even though he is fixed, he jumps up behind him and trys to go to town. It’s an absolutely hilarious sight. I’m going to take a picture and print out cards this year that say “Merry F***ing Christmas” (e-mail me if you want one!)
My parrot Ringo (African Grey) laughs hysterically during dramatic parts of movies. Titanic absolutely cracked him up- he howled with laughter, especially when all the people were dying.
My other parrot Kramer (an African Senegal) tells me “night night Kramie!” each and every night before bed
My cat, Pebbles beats the crap out of both dogs. Big fun to watch!
An optimist sees an opportunity in every calamity; A pessimist sees a calamity in every opportunity.
No explanation needed, Dougie. I’ve had my cable-free periods myself. Missed the entire OJ thing because of it. Speaking of OJ, didn’t he have an interesting dog?
A dear friend of mine–an older woman whose daughter went to high school with me–died 2 1/2 years ago. 
She had a big gray cat who often acted aloof to me–as if that were unusual for cats.
One time I jokingly chided the cat with “Bad Kitty!”
The older woman said, “She’s not bad!”
I continued facetiously: *“All * cats are bad.” (just kidding)
I had one cat who would chase her own tail…around the top rung of a step ladder.
With my current two kittens, normally Moody is the one afraid of anything new, and Shilla is more laid back. The other day, I turned on the ceiling fan in the living room - Shilla reacted like it was an alien come to suck his brains out.
We actually are owned by a real cat. He adopted us. My husband the guitar player named him Sovtek, after his amplifier. Sigh. He’s pretty ordinary, except that he adores my husband, who, while he thinks cats are okay as long as they catch mice, is not a “cat person.” I mean, Sovtek is just crazy about Tim. All over him constantly. The cat won’t have a thing to do with me. And he’s never caught a mouse, either.
My old cat used to kill squirrels, then line up the tails as trophies in the backyard under the porch (under the porch meant the shed, it’s complicated, but there was a lot of space down there we used a lot). He died of injuries sustained in what the vet said looked like a fight with an opossum. He once put a long deep scar in the neighbors’ dog’s nose. He was a fighter.
"No job’s too small, we bomb them all."
-Ace Wrecking Company