Gelatinous Goo

*THIS is why they try to keep me as busy at work as possible. Today, I was running a job that runs ridiculously easy and didn’t require much maintainence so my mind started to wander. At about 7:00 I began to fixate on the phrase “gelationous goo.” (I don’t have a clue where the phrase came from; for some reason I think it was mentioned in some old science fiction story I read as a youth.) At about 8:00, gelatinous goo poetry began to form in my head.

I thought … I should post this. I’m sure others must have their own gelatinous goo feelings to share as well. So, please … continue my work. Try to keep the same poetic meter and rhyme scheme of you can. Hell, maybe I’ll make a website out of this. This could become The “Burma Shave” of the New Millenium! *


Now sing we a song of Gelatinous Goo
My heart’s in the highlands
My foot’s in my shoe
My clues have been left
By a doggie named Blue
But still I do love you
Gelatinous Goo.
My life was so empty before I met you
My kids were all demons
My wife was a shrew
My wanger was flaccid
My bar was all fu
Please never forsake me
Gelatinous Goo.
There once was a woman I wanted to woo
So pretty and sexy
And innocent too
She left me the moment
I asked her so true,
“Please marry and be my
Gelatinous Goo.”


Okay … you get the idea … take it, Satchmo.

I keep trying to sing it to the tune of “Galaxy Glue.”

Gelatinous Goo…
Gelatinous Goo…

What would you do without Gelatinous Goo…

Hmmm, it could work.

Hey, Goo, are you gelatinous?

I’m glad I’m not the only one who gets weird little sayings in their head.

I can’t say I’ve ever written poetry about it, though.

The way to my heart is my stomach, it’s true
But feeding me well
May be quite something new
No beef steak, no carrots,
No wallaby stew
But a big steaming bowl of
Gelatinous Goo.

Eutychus with his Goo

Got home from work
Took off my shoe
Picked through my toes
For Gelatinous Goo

It’s not just for sickos
It’s for both me and you
Don’t laugh at my love
Of Gelatinous Goo

Scratched at my sphincter
Came up with poo
It’s nice but not great
Like Gelatinous Goo

Searched under the fridge
Oh my Lord a breakthrough
'Midst dead roaches and rat crap
My Gelatinous Goo!

Oh lust of my life
Sweeter than fondue
A sweet slick puddle
Of Gelatinous Goo

It kisses my lips
Like a subtle tattoo
I become one
With my Gelatinous Goo

Dear Welby1
and Eutychus, too
It’s making me sick
and I think I will spew

What does it look like?
What does it do?
What would I want
with “gelatinous goo”?

(Oh, and please let me know
As I’ve yardwork to do)

You can take it on a boat
You can feed it to a goat
You can put it in you hair
You can put it anywhere
Put it in your chimney flue
Nothing like burning Gelantinous Goo!

You can throw it at your mom
You can put it in a bomb
You can store it in your freezer
You can give it to a girl if it will please her
If she likes it lots she might sue
For custody of the Gelatinous Goo!

It looks kind of gooey and sticky
It looks said my wife, “Kind of icky.”
My daughter thinks that it looks gross
Even when it’s spread on toast
Now Machy Baby you have a clue
Of what to do with Gelatinous Goo!

<Buddy Holly>

I love you
Gelatinous Goo
With a love so warped and true
My Jelly,
Gelatinous Goo
I need you now,
and I want you
Gelatinous Goo

</Buddy Holly>

:eek

You may be surprised what a man must go through
There’s only so much I’ll be subjected to
But the moment it gets overwhelming, it’s true
I love to dive into Gelatinous Goo

When life gets me down, when I feel somewhat blue
I know there is something that I can turn to
It isn’t TV, or a walk in the zoo
I just roll around in Gelatinous Goo

People may scoff and they’ll criticise too
But they don’t understand what that substance can do
Go on and try out a bucket or two
Yes, smother yourself with Gelatinous Goo

I’ll sing out its praises on drum and kazoo
And write to my congressman’s Great Aunty Lou
They’re sure to agree when I show who is who
That there’s nothing quite like my Gelatinous Goo

[salt n Pepa}Don’t know how you do that voodoo that you do
you making me nuthing but a pile of gelatinous goo.
[The Band?] Oooh oooh ain’t it good for you? That good old fashioned gelatinous goo.