A tangent from certain posts in this thread.
I don’t see how there could be a debate as to whether transsexuals are really the gender they identify as or the gender corresponding to their birth sex. Some cisgendered people have a habit of insisting the latter, especially for transwomen. How can the cisgendered possibly make that statement, given that they have never been transgender and will never understand what it’s like?
If a person is born with a penis, does that make them a man? My personal favorite analogy for that is, if someone is born with a cleft palette, does that make them a camel. If you were born with a cleft palette, I, as someone who was not, am still not going to insist that you are a camel unless you tell me that you feel you are one.*
Aren’t people entitled to define themselves and not be limited by what others think?
Aside from all that is the issue of simply treating people with respect. An MtF who goes and spends $29,000** on psychologist sessions, hormone therapy, endocrinologist visits, laser and/or electrolysis, and surgery isn’t doing it so that she can go around being referred to as a man. If that’s what she wanted she wouldn’t have had to do anything. Also, for many the main driving force behind transition is an intense dislike for the characteristics of their birth sex. Referring to a transitioned person as their birth sex feels as insulting as calling them a cockroach covered in slime. This is not a slight to the other gender, merely a reflection of the deep psychological struggles these people suffer through for decades before seeking treatment.
So is it really so difficult to say, “I hear you saying that you identify as a man/woman so I believe you, I will consider the idea that you really are such, and I will respect your desire to be treated as such”?
*(Incidentally, there are people who identify as trans-species - I know of such a person in real life, I used to work with him, but that’s a whole nother topic for a different thread.)
**(I’m sure some spend three times that.)