Sigh I remember when Rock was just the Devil’s music… There are enough bad bands as it is, without you stinking up the landscape.
Get bent.
Had anyone particular in mind, or are you just venting?
[Bart Simpson]
“All the best bands are affiliated with Satan”
[/Bart Simpson]
Hmm. Leperous capybara would make a good band name. And “Get Ass-Fucked by the” would be a good album name…
If you miss one ‘a’ from this thread title, it turns into a travelling salesman crying his wares.
“Get ass fucked by leprous capybara Christian rockers! Get ass fucked by leprous capybara Christian rockers here! Just $5 a time! Tired of goat? Try capybara! Roll up and get your ass-fuck here!”
Whether this is a symptom of too much or too little coffee, I’m not sure.
After I finally managed to parse your thread title, 
I decided to come in here and add my 2 cents worth.
Longtime Christian (and music-lover) here who has to agree with the OP. I “strongly dislike” Christian rock, mainly because it sounds exactly like regular rock. I mean, what’s the point? We’re supposed to come out and be separate from the world–I want someone to explain to me what we accomplish by cloning Britney Spears or TLC or Backstreet Boys and having them sing love songs to Jesus instead of to the guy/girl down the street.
The rationale is supposed to be, “Well, this way your kids can still listen to rock and not feel socially left-out.” Well, I don’t happen to feel that my teenagers are going to be “polluted” if they listen to Metallica, even if they want to spend their allowance on a CD. I’d rather have them listen to good Metallica than mediocre fill-in-the-blank-with-name-of-current-Christian-rock-band.
I think the whole idea of Christian “hard rock” is dumb. The whole point of hard rock is supposed to be youthful rebellion and angst, not to mention getting stoned or drunk or whatever. What’s Christian hard rock rebelling AGAINST? God? No. The Devil? Maybe, as a subtext, but they’re sure not singing about it. Their parents? Hardly. “Yeah, I’m really rebelling against my folks, I’m going to a ROCK CONCERT that opens with a word of prayer.”
I just can’t get into pumping my fist into the air to the tune of “Jee-ee-sus will ROCK YOU!!” Um, no, sorry, that’s not how the words go, okay?
BWAAAAHAHAHAHA!! The sad part being that I live in a region of the country where you might find people saying that.
Having grown up with Rez, Daniel Amos etc., I wholeheartedly agree. It just doesn’t work.
ewwww…
For shame no one has yet cited the only legitimate theological authority on the matter of Christian rock bands and their purpose.
Now I’ve got to go sacrifice more children to Magog as my CDs command me to.
Last night at dinner, my friend Jeff, whom I see a few times a year when he comes to town with work, mentioned that he likes Creed.
I groaned.
“They’re paving the way for the second coming of Stryper!” I railed. “They’re Stryper in grunge clothing!”
I know they’re not “Christian rock,” per se, but to me, they’re the same thing.
Grr. (I agree with all of the above.)
The Tim, that was a great comic! Where can I buy some of those? The point was that it’s OK to sign contracts in blood with Satan, right? Jesus: Eternal Attorney. “Thanks, Jesus!”
I love the idea of someone arguing that listening to Christian rock will make you more likely to fit in. I was reminded of a passage from the Onion:
I was wondering if the OP was inspired by this site?
http://diseased_animal_sex.com/capybara/leprosy.htm
[sub]Ha ha! Made you look![/sub]
wow… I’m impressed. Reading back through the op, it kinda makes sense. hmmm…
:breathes sigh of relief:
The best part was when he indriectly equated the Afro-Caribbean musical tradition (i.e., the basic elements of RnR), with Satan. Anyone else notice the little “timeline” coincided with the assimilation of “black music” into popular music?
The Tim:
You should’ve been here in Monterey when there was a big Christian Rock concert out at Laguna Seca. I, for one, was quite amused by all the fans jumping up and down giving the two finger salute to the bands throughout the concert. So many of the rabid fundamentalist anti-mormon types are quick to point out that the LDS use hand signs and therefore are part of the devil’s group. Interesting that the same groups conveniently ignore the old “evil eye”/“satan” salute when their pals are doing it, huh?
I don’t even bother listening to Christian music anymore (except for CeCe Winans or Michael Card). Everything I hear is 5 years behind the times, wannabe-like-the-latest-secular-thing, lame lyric singers. I mean, come up with your OWN acts, for heaven’s sakes! Don’t just copy what secular music is doing!
Those friends of mine in Nashville that were incredible musicans/lyricists couldn’t get the time of day from Christian labels because they were “too serious” or not commercial enough. Granted, you’ve got to be commercial to sell, but isn’t the purpose of Christian music supposed to be a little higher than that? I mean, is it necessary for them to look like Jennifer Lopez or Britney to get any attention? Not to mention that the labels were dirtier than any secular label stories we heard!
Except, Montfort, that Stryper SUCKED, still sucks, and would continue to suck. (Can you tell I’m a Creed fan!? 
)
My husband was in a Christian “metal” band called Xalt that was signed and had about 3 albums out. If any of ya have heard of them, you get major points!
Yeah, Jack Chick is a floating mass of dogmatic axioms that seem to contradict (like the Bible!)
Monty- That would be great to see.
Christian bands excel by virtue of being able to raise the energy level of their listeners. When I visited a pentacostal service the experience was like a non-violent mosh pit for God. The energy in the room is insane (I didn’t feel the spirit however). I can see how one could get swept up in it.
Of course when a secular band does it its brain washing our children. When a religious band does it their pouring out the Spirit of the Lord. :rolleyes:
Why do we need Creed when we still have Pearl Jam around?
The problem that I have with Christian rock is that they think every song has to directly address and praise God. How many ways can you say it? The result is bland, unoriginal drivel. God is not glorified by mediocrity, or by poorly written lyrics.
If these “musicians” were truly interested in glorifying God, they would write intelligent songs about a variety of subjects, leaving out the swear words, keeping it clean. This can be done.
All Christian rock does is cater to a market of young people whose parents won’t let them listen to Backstreet Sync or the 'N Boys.