ghost professions

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

Judging from their histories, I think is the majority of ghosts in the
world reportedly used to be prostitutes. This correlation needs to
be looked into, for several reasons.

  1. If I want to become a ghost, should I have a lot of sex with
    different people?

  2. Based on the Catholic demonologies, there are no lawyers in
    Hell. Since it is unlikely that they are in Heaven, one would think
    they would be ghosts. Is prostitution and the law mutually
    exclusive as far as supernatural apparitionism?

  3. Other ghostly professions include playing bagpipes, but
    far be it from me to extrapolate anything about that.

2

I would extrapolate that people who play bagpipes tend be die violent deaths (people killing them, to end the bagpipe playing). Violent death often leads to becoming a ghost.

3

The majority of the ghosts in this world are not prostitutes—they’re non-existent. In fact, I’d go so far as to say that more than the majority, meaning all of the ghosts in this world, or any other, are non-existant. So, if you wanna become a ghost, I’d say you’re SOL.

4

Well, someday I would like to be non-existent… Does that mean I should become a prostitute? In other words:
If most ghosts are prostitutes (as mixcoatl asserts) and
All ghosts are non-existent (as UncleBeer asserts)
Then, most prostitues are non-existent

Boy oh boy, do I love misusing my philosophy degree… It’s not called a BS for nothing!

5

Well I don’t want to become non-existent. In fact I would like to exist for as long as possible. It would therefore seem logical that to maximise my chances of existing, i shouldn’t become a prostitute.

6

I am pretty much non-existent in my office, but does that mean I am the office whore? :dubious:

7

Yes, very logical indeed, captain. As for me, I would like to go on existing for quite some time too, but when I do decide that my time has come, you’ll find me out on the corner in some shady part of town…

But that leads me to ask, when does a prostitute become a prostitute? Is it when the person in question decides to become a prostitute, or only after they become successful in receiving money for services rendered? And if it’s after they become successful, how successful do they have to be? Just wondering how far I’d have to go…
Is it just me, or did I turn this conversation in a strange direction?

8

The conclusion doesn’t follow logically from the premises. It would follow only if most prostitutes are ghosts, not the other way around.

How far you go would depend on how much you’re getting paid.

9

I’ve heard of librarian ghosts. Perhaps you could be one of them if the prostitute thing doesn’t work out.

10

Well, bringing logic to bear on the problem it would seem you would have to carry out prostitution to actually be a prostitute. After all, any old joe bloggs can just call themselves a prostitute, doesn’t mean they are one does it? What i’m not sure about though is whether having sex with your partner, then giving them 2p (or 2 cents or you’re American) would be enough to count… :dubious:

If that doesn’t work you could always use Never to be Queen’s suggestion and become a librarian. Or ignore it altogether as Otto has pointed out a bit of a flaw in our logic.

11

I would think that the best way to guarantee ghostdom is to have sex only once, but not marry the other person. That person can go on to a happy life while you die filled with unrequited love. The problem is that you end up becoming one of those mopey ghosts that nobody really wants to be around.

Other good professions seem to be pirate or king. If you can name it preceeded by “G-g-g-ghost” it’s probably okay.