Nah, the proper response is, “I appear to have gotten my blood on your blade. Here, take mine."
Then you stab back.
“Out damned spot. Out! I say! One, Two…”
Yeah, you better run!
Three.
No, no, not there, a little to the left, and down a bit, just a tiny bit. Now harder, harder. Ahhh, got it.
OP didn’t ask for reactions to getting shot with an arrow.
“Oh dear - that’s left a stain!”
“Careful! you could hurt someone with that thing!”
I’m just a bard who can’t feel pain
Makes me a bit of a grouch
I always say “stab me again”
When I should really say “ouch”
And just in case you don’t know the tune:
When I accidentally jabbed a knife into my hand while trying to separate frozen burgers my 2 year old son recounted it to Ms. P he said “Dad was squirting.”
“Would you mind not doing that?”
“Thank you sir. May I have another?”
“What are you gonna do, stab me?”
https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/what-are-you-gonna-do-stab-me
“It’s only a flesh wound”?
Related: The first Christmas my wife and I were together (almost 40 years ago) we went to her parents house. One of her brothers was late arriving because he got stabbed by one of his tenants. It’s an Italian family and I was seriously wondering what I’d gotten myself into! He showed up eventually, no big deal, and was a very nice guy, didn’t seem concerned about it at all.
Is that your sword or are you just glad to see me?
“At least buy me dinner first!”
“That’s not a knife.” In a thick Australian accent.