Can anyone explain why you are not supposed to let your elbows get anywhere near the tabletop?
I heard it dates back to midieval times where you sat in a row and doing so might bump your neighbor, spill a drink, whatever.
I don’t care what the reasoning is, it’s a fucking stupid rule and I don’t follow it. Let them think I’m a heathen.
My wife and I taught our kids good table manners and when to use them. The only one I really enforced when eating as a family at home was “chew with your mouth closed”. That one is a pet peeve of mine, not just because of the view I now have of your half chewed food but also because of the accompanying smacking sounds. It drives me batty! I will admit, though, that it is very much a cultural thing. In other cultures, a group meal sounds a bit like 100 vacuums in a gelatin factory. When in that situation I probably won’t join the symphony, but I readily accept that I am the odd one there.
I was taught that you should leave the table, maybe going to a bathroom, and blowing your nose there. Surely it’s more polite than subjecting your dining companions to snorting and sniffling and other unappetizing noises.
I think it’s ok to stay seated, but turn away at least 120 degrees from the table and blow your nose discretely (do NOT do an elephant blow!). Blowing your nose while still facing the table is just gross.
My Wife had a boss that after a meeting that food was served, would floss his teeth at the table. I don’t think I ever seen anything that tops that.
Not many rules here.
Licking fingers is pretty standard. Some homes just don’t have napkins. When given the choice of buying napkins or buying food, food will win. Using tortillas to wipe your fingers is common, and makes the tortilla tasty. And tortillas may be cheaper as the price is controlled. Whereas, to my knowledge, there are no paper mills here in the peninsula. So paper products have to be shipped thousands of miles. Which adds to the cost.
One common rule is you don’t drink your soup from the bowl. Even after all the solid food is gone. I don’t particularly like this rule, because there are no soup spoons. Just teaspoons. But I go along with it.
I drink my soup from the bowl. I don’t care who likes it. I also drink my milk from the bowl after the cereal’s gone.
How do you deal with the dehydration, though?
What, you think other non-bibbed nations don’t eat shellfish? Never had a Fruit de Mer in Provence or cracked a crab in Cromer?
The rest of the world manages to eat shellfish without a baby bib.
if the seating is tight, doing so takes space from your neighbor. I follow this one situationally. That is, the place I vacation where it’s a practical rule, I follow it. Otherwise, not so much.
my dad would have spent half the meal in the bathroom if he tried to eat anything spicy, or hot soup, or… You are effectively decreeing that he shouldn’t be allowed to eat many foods in company.
He never did a loud honking snort or anything, but yeah, he blew his nose repeatedly during some meals. It never occurred to me to be bothered. I think you should learn to accept this.
My funniest seafood bib experience was at a lobster house in New Jersey that also served crab. I got the crab. My companions had lobster, and they were given metal claw-crackers and picks, along with bibs. I was given a stick, to hit the crabs (in the hopes they will crack open) and no bib.
With the right tools, I don’t really need the bib for lobster, it’s certainly no more hazardous than a grapefruit. But with just a stick, needless to say, I made a mess, and got red bay-scented crab juice all over me.
Just NO.
Blowing one’s nose at the table is NOT acceptable in polite company. Someone in your house got issues? I get it, you can manage it, in private, anyway that suits. But if you’re out in public or visiting another house, you don’t have to go to another room, but PLEASE at least get up and turn away from the table, to blow your nose.
I’m not much of a fussbudget for polite manners. I won’t care what spoon you use, if your elbows are on the table, whether you tear or cut your bread etc, etc. But, good lord, nothing announces you’re ill mannered, quite as loud as blowing your nose at a table where others are eating. (It’s not the honking either, the noise is not the gross part! Get a clue!)
Why should I have to accept this? I think it’s gross - am I not allowed to be bothered by behavior just because it doesn’t bother you?
Not that it matters - it’s highly unlikely I’d ever host your father for a dinner of spicy food.
It’s not a baby bib, it’s a lobster or crab bib. And they don’t serve Maine lobsters in Provence or Maryland steamed crabs in Cromer. So mess up your clothes with your discount versions of shellfish all you like. We eat our food with glee and glory, not picking at it like birds afraid to ruffle their feathers.
As my father passed away some years ago, it seems unlikely to come up. But just as you probably try not to be offended by people with disabilities that prevent them from acting completely “normal” in various situations, I think you should recognize that some people produce a lot of fluid when they eat, and need to manage that – in a way that is incompatible with eating with you, I guess.
Ah, I had no idea American exceptionalism extended to seafood.
I think you’d be hard pushed to suggest that the French don’t know how to enjoy their food, or Norfolk doesn’t produce some of the most amazing crab in the world. And yet we still don’t need a stupid baby bib.
Honestly, it makes you all look like Trump.
This also allows the blower to wash his hands before touching the gravy bowl again. Seriously, if it’s acceptable to hork loogies at the dinner table it should also be acceptable to throw coffee cups, at a high velocity, at the skull of the horker.
Just eat enough food that has high water content. Drinking becomes unnecessary in that case.
Isn’t French seafood usually served with the shells already cracked? It’s cracking the shells that is messy.
I don’t really eat ribs, so one the rare occasion that I’ve encountered them, I probably didn’t eat more than one and didn’t have a chance to get messy. But I used napkins. Ditto fried chicken and fajitas and any other food traditionally eaten without the hands.
A discreet, single lick of a finger after say, picking up a doughnut, is allowable.