I hereby set my neck on the chopping block.
I’ve sensed, certainly from the replies to the movie thread in this forum (which see), that I am facing off against every other Doper who posts on this boards. I am not doing this as an egotistical maneuver, but rather an attempt to get a better picture of myself as others (of the Teeming Millions, anyway) see me.
And you are . . . ?
That’s my point. Just ask other Dopers who post here.
You are a sorry excuse for a human being. I feel you should go and play chicken on the railroad tracks for the good of the entire world. Your opinions on SDMB are held at a lower regard than a skunk in heat. Get on with your pitiful life, and get away from here. Someday, when all the stupid people in the world are lined up to be shot, you will be first. Cogratulations.
BTW, I have absolutly nothing against you. I’m just in a pissy mood and feel like making random insults.
Awwwww…
Isnt that sweet? Someone slipped Dougie some acid.
Dougie, dont leave your drinks unnattended and this wont happen again.
As if anyone could NOT like you. Yeah… right.
I’m glad you appended that disclaimer, SuperNova. I was going to ask you to stand right behind me. 
Thanks, kellibelli.
Dude, i got no idea who you are, but if it makes you feel better:
I hope you die a screeching, tortured mass of flesh and rotting bone in a vat of flaming rat vomit while thousands of microscopic jack hammers chip away at what’s left of your funny bones, eyes and other nerve endings
AND!
YOU’RE FAT
Do they have to be provoked insults? If not…
You suck!
(sorry, I’m not in the mood of coming up with a more creative insult right now)
- You start a thread referencing an earlier thread and are too lazy to look up and provide a link.
1a. You’ve essentially revived a discussion that died of exhaustion and boredom almost a full month ago.
-
You start a “people on this board hate me” thread. That’s not only tiresome and passe, but I believe you may owe royalties to techchick and Homer, among others.
-
The “I’m inviting people to abuse me because I want to see how I’m perceived” is not only egotistical (despite your disclaimer), it’s also disingenuous and borderline trollish.
-
If you want “a picture of you as the Teeming Millions see you”, try this link. Read every thread, and pay close attention to posts that respond to you or describe you. Extrapolate from there.
-
Have a nice day.
Your favorite band sucks.
God DAMN it. That was the funniest thing I’ve read yet… I think that thread IN IT’S ENTIRETY should be required reading before someone’s membership is accepted. I’ve already been guilty of three of those ‘standard posts’. I’ll have to be careful not to do it again!
jarbaby
Aren’t you the middle-aged virgin that still lives with his mom?
puts Pot on Dougie’s Head
Stands off with High Caliber Rifle
Shoots Pot off Dougie’s Head
There. Worked like a charm.
I agree, that thread is priceless! As funny as any Monty Python Skit I’ve ever seen! (Newbie Brown-nosing)
My Semi-beef (Newbie showing the obligatory caution)
You started a thread that I loved, and posted to several times: The All-TV Character thread. But Hastur wrote a perfect ending to the story! But you couldn’t leave well enough alone!
http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=44678&pagenumber=2
I also thought that your compalints against service people were somewhat petty. http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=55358
This is constructive criticism. You asked.
Have A Nice Day.
dougie:
I don’t often pick on someone’s choice of religion, but your beliefs that you stated in this thread just plain creep me out. You’d rather see a kid (or yourself) die on the operating table than accept a blood transfusion. To be so brainwashed by religion that you would let yourself or others die from neglect is not the world’s most admirable quality, IMHO. It is also the ultimate in pure, unabashed ignorance. 'Round these parts, we don’t like that kind of thing.
In that thread you also chose to ignore pretty much everyone’s arguments and admitted that you hadn’t even read most of the posts from the opposing side, since you were paying by the minute for Internet access from Kinkos. Bizarre…and rude, too. Got a computer yet, dougie?
In the movie thread, you showed off some sort of strange, easily offended, one-dimensional thought process. I really cannot understand how someone could be offended by the stoner ordering pizza in class in Ferris Bueler. I can also not understand how it could make you so offended that you would swear off the cinema altogether for several years. If I hadn’t already read the thread on refusing medical treatment thread, I’d have thought you were putting us on.
I can’t speak for everyone on the board, dougie, but I think I speak for more than a few when I say that you display all the intelligence of a fence post. Not one of those fancy electrified fences, either. I’m thinking more along the lines of a funky, old, rotting wood fence.
Hey, you wanted criticism…
All right, I’m sorry. I should have posted the proper link in the OP. [url:http.//boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=47127]Here it is.
Incidentally, I have no idea who Ferris Bueller is. Was that the name of Sean Penn’s character in Fast Times at Ridgemont High? If so, fine and dandy. Naturally, I was not predisposed to seek out the name of a character in a movie if a snippet I’d seen made me angry. (Sean Penn’s off-screen persona makes me angry too, but that’s a topic for another thread.)
As for the blood issue, I stand by the position I’ve taken. I don’t see any inconsistency between the passage in Leviticus chapter 17–which the Witnesses cite as a basis to eschew blood transfusions–and the Sixth Commandment. Although I am obviously outvoted on this matter, I still maintain I am right. (Matthew 10:34-39; Acts 5:37-39)
Generally, I welcome constructive criticism. When I posted this topic I was not hoping for the Teeming Millions to act as rubber stamps. I use a maxim I have quoted even to some people who have given me severe criticism over the years: Hey, if I’ve made a mistake, I want to know about it!! It just might help me avoid making the same mistake again. I don’t want other Dopers to shower me with sugar coating any more than I want them to shower me with vitriol.
In fact, I have been curious and sensitive about what other people have actually thought about me for many years. I assure everyone I had no sentiment of malice or self-pity when I posted this topic.
–dougie_monty
You may find your’re better off using the “preview” function. It’s common courtesy to test any links that you include to verify their functionality.
Your point is well taken, Zenster. Indeed I should have previewed that posting, as I realized–in hindsight–when the URL appeared in the posted thread instead of the hyperlink. 
o:o Mea culpa.
you stink and you momma dress you funny