Sorry about that.
I can’t change my postingstyle.
I blame it on my English.
Thank you guys for making me laugh after a long, long, trying night at work.
I know right where to come when I need a good laugh.
Eve, I was already there, but the Monty Python reference put me over the edge.
No, the poem would have started with
“There once was a woman from Frankenmuth…”
I think I’ll stick with my flak jacket, in spite of the fact that it does absolutely nothing for my meager bustline.
I wonder if her first thoughts were something like this:
“Good God, I’ve been hit! Holy shit, I’m gonna die! Mother of Mosas, my blood is clear and gel-like!”
[hyjack] Flack jackets…mmm. While they do nothing for the female form, for some reason I think they’re just yummy on the male. They’re just so…black and flacky. [/hyjack]
Montfort will dive in front of you.
no worries, anniz. i like your swedish hiakus.
Now a news story from a few years back makes more sense. Apparently the voters of Newport, Maine, are misogynists who want their women to die horrible deaths. MAINE OKS TOPLESS MOWING
From the news article bibliophage linked to:
Isn’t there a logical inconsistency here?
“Swedish hiakus”? Is that what they’re calling them now? 
Forget bras. Where can I get some extra padded liquid-curved underwear? Not only are my testicles 2 ft closer to the mower, but according to some previous thread, nothing compares to the experience of being slammed in the nuts.
Hell, he’ll probably just be attached anyway!! 
Keep in mind that there may be tradeoffs to the use of bras as a safety device…
Uh-huh. What he said. 
I’d gladly take a bullet in the head if it protects her beautiful breasts from damage.
That’s a heck of a link there, dqa. Kind of difficult to choose a favourite but maybe I like this best:
Krzysztof Azninski, 30, had been drinking all day in his garden with his three friends. The four men put on traditional “toughness bonnets” and played macho games. Franciszek Zyzcoszusko, 41, put his hand on a chopping block and dared Azninski to cut it off. Azninski hacked at it with a knife, partially severing the wrist, then put his own head on the block and challenged Zyzcoszusko to chop it off - which he did, with an axe. The revellers then decided things had gone too far, stopped the contest and began to sing a folksong called ‘Roll the head of the giant’, which woke the neighbours. Polish News Agency - 25 October 1994
Boys will be boys…
Guess that I’ll have to rely on my massive pectoral muscles to protect me.
<flex> <flex>
<thick pseudo-Austrian accent>
You are a pathetic little girly man. Your tiny little pectoral muscles do not have the ample power that mine have which are required for adequate bra supporting. Fear my muscley man-tits. flex flex grips hands behind head and flexes again
</thick pseudo-Austrian accent>
What a crock! I would be seriously surprised if the lady were killed by a one and a half inch nail in the right side of her chest. Even if it did enter directly over her heart or penetrated her rib cage, the most it could have entered her heart would be a centimeter. The only thing that could have killed her is infection or tetanus from the rust, both of which wouldn’t kill her for a few days. That means no “drop-dead” on the spot.
I think the paramedic tried to make himself a hero and get “some” by telling her she was in grave danger. Then again, Frankenmuth was probably in need of a little excitement. Apparently so was she; wearing her wonder bra to mow the lawn…come on!
Excuse me but I think she would impress the grass better if she *did not * wear one, dont you think? he he he…sorry. testosterone got to me this one time.
Maybe Madonna’s on to something with those metallic cone bras. They’re actually for personal protection. Maybe major league baseball catchers should wear them.