Religion causes too many problems. So I propose that from now on Good Deeds be saved up in some kind of karmic checking account. For instance…
Find and return somebody’s wallet: +30 points. Pick up litter at the park: +8 points. Put change in a strangers expired parking meter: +9 points.
And then there are Good Deeds that aren’t quite as good because you get something out of it…
Buy a box of Girl Scout cookies: +2 points. Dropping a handful of pennies loudly into the tip jar at the coffee shop: a mere +.06 points per penny. Adopt a kitten: +16 points.
Then, from this good deed balance, bad deeds are subtracted…
Shoplift a chapstik: -3 points. Cut somebody off in traffic: -4 points. Don’t clean up your dog’s “business” at the park: -8 points. Biggies like murder: -30,000 points.
Those with anything left in their account when they die get into heaven. Those with more than 10,000 points get platinum membership and free unlimited drink refills.
The only problem I foresee is folks with REALLY big accounts (nuns, firemen, boy scouts etc.) might have so many points saved up that they could kill someone with impunity, and know that they’re still getting in (which might be a problem for me as I have a tendency to piss off nuns).
Hey, it works for me. In fact, I’m gonna head over the the animal shelter and pick up 1875 kittens. Right after I kill the bastard that didn’t clean up the dog shit I stepped in.
I’m wondering how we score neutral deeds though. What happens if I take a parking ticket off someone’s car and put it on another? Do I just break even?
And I can work with it.
I clean up my dog do everytime, for years and years. Then, now that I’m well ahead, I can now pick up the do and toss it at any other persons I see and dislike.
This works for me.
Wisdom is the boobie prize,they give you when you’ve been --unwise!
So, you’re telling me that because I was an awkward teenage boy I’m going to hell? There aren’t enough lost wallets in the world to make it up. Damn. No fair.
I’m gonna stick to religion. I get paroled after I go to confession. Lately our Catholic parish has been assigning community service for some major transgressions. I don’t want to dwell on my offense but, I got a week-long sentence to serve meals at a local elderly home.
Sticking with Inky’s system, I’m probably at -15,000 points now, give or take a few hundred. That’s a lot of kittens.
Well, I guess I’ll be going straight to hell. At least my username fits.
All there is to thinking is seeing something noticeable which makes you see something you weren’t noticing which makes you see something that isn’t even visable.
$#%@, I posted that to the wrong thread. How many points do I lose for that?
What I meant to ask in this thread was, how many points do I get for saving glass jars and bottles and aluminum cans and giving them to my mother to recycle?
but, I got a week-long sentence to serve meals at a local elderly home.