Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer...

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

Mr. Rilch and I have been trying to figure out the meaning of these two lines: “Should we open up her gifts or send 'em back?/Send 'em back!”

Now how is the question being posed, and is the response an agreement or disagreement?

Scenario one: Q: “Should we open the gifts she gave us?”
A: “No! Grandma only gives bunny slippers and congealed fudge! Get rid of them!”

Scenario two: Q: “Should we open the gifts she gave us?”
A: “Absolutely! This is the last smooth divinity fudge and the last hand-knit sweater we’ll get from Grandma! Send 'em back? Are you insane?”

Scenario three: Q: “Should we take back the gifts we got for her, or let Grandpa open them?”
A: “What does Grandpa need with lavender bath beads and a subscription to Soap Opera Digest? Send 'em back!”

Scenario three: Q: “Should we let Grandpa have the gifts we got for her, or return them where from we got 'em, for cash?”
A: “What Grandpa doesn’t know won’t hurt him.”

Any takers?

2

That song is an ABOMINATION.

For once I had almost squeaked through the Christmas season without hearing it or being exposed to it. Thanks to you, I can now hear it plain as day.

There will be no opinion offered for your question, only curses.

3

It is scenario 3 (the first one). Remember, these are rednecks. They’re not going to consider sending back their presents, no matter who they’re from.

4

I just downloaded that song done by Less than Jake. it’s really cool. It makes me laugh amongst the majority of idiotic Christmas music which makes me want to puke.

5

Hm. I think it’s 4. Spare Grandpa the added grief of seeing the polyester shawl she would have worn, and get the cash.

6

Scenario three: Q: “Should we let Grandpa have the gifts we got for her, or return them where from we got 'em, for cash?”
A: “What Grandpa doesn’t know won’t hurt him.”
…
Um, I think they will take the presents back that she would have gotten and keep the money themselves, grandpa won’t see it. This is trailertrash folk, after all.

7

D’oh! I just now noticed that I had two "three"s!

8

I interpreted the song in yet another way. I figured the gifts they were wondering about were from SANTA, maybe a sort of payback for losing Grandma, or hush money, something of the sort. And now the family isn’t sure if they should open them.

9

Poe did a great lounge version of this song on KROQ’s 1997 Christmas CD, A Family Christmas in your ass.

[hijack]
I think my favourite song from a KROQ Christmas album (Santa’s Swingin’ Sack) was Chirstmas when you’re Dead by “Frank Sinatra” (KROQ’s “Ralph”).

*There’s no singin’ “Deck the halls”
When you have maggots on your balls!
Christmas just ain’t Christmas when you’re dead!"

…

I won’t be back 'cause I’m dead!*

[/hijack]