Grow the FUCK up or get the FUCK out !!!!

The BBQ Pit
1

This rant has been fulminating for weeks but really came to a head last night ( pardon the soon-to-be-apparent pun).

I’m in a class of 18-50 year olds taking our state EMT certification. Last night we viewed a videotape of a woman giving birth. Now, for some of the wee young laddies this may yet have been their first very up close view of a woman’s vagina. ** BIG FUCKING DEAL, BOYS**!!!. If you want to be certified to place your hands on strangers and render care unto them, then GET SOME MATURITY IN YOUR ASSES AND GROW THE FUCK UP. Nobody needs to hear the comments, the snickering, the whole shebang.

The lack of professionalism already evident is grotesque. It’s the HUMAN BODY- at work, doing something natural and rather amazing, IMHO. I’d never witnessed a birth in any way before ( adopted kids ), and so was enthralled and moved. Why is it that so many of the men in the class- of ALL ages- were totally incapable of asking questions that involved the word “vagina” or the word “uterus”, or the phrase " amniotic sac"??? What the FUCK WILL THEY DO when their patient is in labor and the umbilical cord is prolapsed, and they have no choice but to insert several fingers into the mother’s vaginal canal and gently hold the baby’s head in place while elevating the pelvis- and KEEP THEIR FINGERS THERE all the way into the O.R.??? Will they be able to render any kind of emotional support at ALL to a delivering mother, or family members?

I’m really fucking angry about this, how dare they engage in an activity that involves delicacy, sensitivity and careful attention to detail and have the lummoxed mentalities of 8th graders?? God help their wives. I know I must sound really just so P.C., but I’m doing this because I get an incredibly deep sense of gratification out of helping out others who are in dire need. They need help, I have the time, inclination and abilities to help them. ( Or, will after I pass my State Finals).

Not every call is a car accident, which is an adrenaline rush and makes you look like a hero. Many are an elderly person who is just sick. Or, a person dying. I have a very fucking hard time having even a SHRED of respect for these people who can’t hold their tongues when viewing something such as this.

Assholes. :mad:

Cartooniverse

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Speaking as a 19-year-old gay man outside the medical field who has never actually seen a vulva in situ, one would think that if someone was going to giggle and blush, it would be me. Therefore, I would like to give the following advice to your peers:

YES, IT’S A VULVA. GET OVER IT.

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Cartooniverse,
In our neck of the woods, there are two types of EMT’s- that’s right, two. (Bear in mind that I am in upstate Assboink, NY). First, there are professional people who want to and do deliver exceptional emergency care to patients with dignity, concern, and respect.

Second are the woodchucks. These are people who, in your worst fucking nightmare, you would not want putting their idiotic fingers anywhere on or around your person. These are the people who get all jacked off on getting an emergency call, do nothing but sit around waiting for an emergency call, drive 90 with their blue light on (in a 1988 Ford Escort) and act like complete fucking morons at the scene of an accident. These are the people who will laugh at a training video, then black out when faced with an actual labor and delivery emergency.

That said, I can tell already you are in group #1- congratulations! When my husband was wacked by a truck while riding his motorcycle, I can tell you I was goddamned glad to see a whole team of #1’s show up to aid him, while the #2’s stood in blaze orange directing traffic with puffed out chests. Unfortunately, you may run into a lot of #2’s in your chosen endevor- good luck with them. They drive me fucking nuts.

I have a good friend who is a #1. He has delivered babies, brought them back to life, and saved a person from insulin shock. He’s pulled bodies out of cars, consoled families, and called me in tears when a family of 5 was killed by a woman driving the wrong way on the highway. (I truly do not ever think he will get over that) It’s a tough, tough job, and I’m glad there are people like him (and you) out there doing it.

You can stick your fingers in MY vagina anytime. Ahem. I mean, any time that I’m in labor. And it’s an emergency. And…well, you know what I’m saying.

Print this out and show it to your instructor and classmates and tell them “Don’t be a fucking woodchuck!”

Zette

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Did the instructor witness any of this?? If I had been in charge, I would have invited them to leave. FIRMLY.

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My son is a paramedic and an instructor. He has stopped a presentation and directed students to leave the classroom for behavior like this.

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My dad used to be an EMT and CPR instructor-trainer (he taught instructors how to teach it) for the Red Cross. During one CPR class he was teaching the Heimlich maneuver, using his patented mnemonic of “back-pounding, gut-squeezing, and fishing.” Then he had the students practice (pretend, of course) with each other. The “victim” would obligingly bend slightly for the back-pounding (pat, pat), then stand up and hold up his arms for the gut-squeezing (squeeze, squeeze), and so on. My dad watched this for a bit, then suddenly started grabbing at his throat and flailing around like a crazy person. When the students finally noticed him, they watched dumbly for a few seconds. Finally someone caught on and tried to whack him on the back – but he fought them off and continued to flail. When two or three of them finally got him “subdued,” everyone in the class had learned the lesson that emergencies are not always pretty, and victims are not always easy to deal with.

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Ahhh, I love you folks. Thank you for these responses- I feel bettah already.

Originally Posted by Matt_mcl

I do see your point and I suppose that the giggling I heard from some of the guys who are not even 18, but are taking the class because they will turn 18 in the same month as the exam is to be expected. I didn’t giggle the first time I saw a woman’s vulva. ( I was already on my knees and so sending up a quick prayer of gratitude was a cakewalk :smiley: ).

Originally Posted by Zette

That is exactly what I am going to do- I’m going to print out this thread this afternoon, and hand it to the instructor. Zette, all lascivious comments aside, the whole reason behind the rant was that it doesn’t matter WHOSE vagina, whose body, whose skin- if they cannot at least fake a professional approach, they truly have no right to be accepting the responsibility and-IMHO-the honor of being granted their Certification.

Yep, I’m what you would call a #1. I’ve been riding with the local corps for 4 1/2 years, have almost 400 calls to my name with the usual array of difficulties, emotional trauma to me, etc. It doesn’t turn me away from it, it makes me want to do this more. Next time I’m in Assboink, NY we can sit down and enjoy a nice garden salad and ice tea. I’ll be the one with the white T-Shirt with a huge red circle and a diagonal line through it with the image of a Woodchuck in the middle :wink:

Originally Posted by Fletch

I’m with you here- and you too Scarlett. The regular instructor was taking the evening off, and another VERY seasoned Paramedic Instructor- who happens to be a woman- did that night’s lecture. The class showed an apalling lack of respect for the material AND the person delivering said material. My guess is that she figured that instead of trying to figure out who was being inappropriate, she would simply let them go on, and drown in their own ignorance and immaturity in the field. Remember, we were seeing a videotape in a large darkened cafeteria. Many people made remarks or giggled. It was dark, and there were too many of em. I happen to agree with you 100% here- they should have been ejected for the night, and spoken to by the lead instructor the next evening before class.
Originally Posted by Scarlett67

Yeah, NO KIDDING !!! This part of it, I understand and NEVER say anything negative to those people in the class who are truly newbies to EMS work. There are a handful of them- most are fire department, or drivers already like me. I can get very angry about stupidity- the reason for my O.P. But, the Heimlich story points up simple ignorance, and you can only fight that with education. The newbies- and a lot of the firefighters who have not done any patient care in their careers yet- haven’t learned the interpersonals yet, and won’t until it’s thrown in their faces. Some people need coddling. Some people are violent. Some people panic and will injure you if you are not careful. And so on. Sounds to me like your Dad was the best kind of teacher- the students learned by living it, not by being told to write it down in a notebook.

In 5 weeks, it will be over with and while I won’t see most of these people again aside from running into them at the E.R. or in the mall, I know they’re out there and hope that at some point, SOMETHING happens to sober them up. Most likely it will be a call that is severely traumatic in nature.
Oh, and Zette? Thanks for the invitation ! :stuck_out_tongue:

Cartooniverse

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You’ll probably have to wait until the twefth of never, Cartoon, since I’m not having any kids. Ain’t that a bitch??

Don’t let the woodchucks get you down-

Zette

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Nah, not really. I dig ya tons regardless. :wink:

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My dad doesn’t teach CPR anymore. One of the reasons is that he’s disabled with rheumatoid arthritis – he can still get around, although with an impressive limp, but his hands are extremely deformed, he’s had at least one wrist fused to give it strength, and he can use only a few of his fingers. (Somehow he still manages to light his Luckies, but that’s another thread.) Not too long ago he was having a conversation with another instructor he knows, and mentioned that he was no longer able to perform CPR because of the arthritis. The other instructor said, “Nah, we can teach you a modified technique.” My dad had to explain to him quite emphatically that it was not being unable to position his hands correctly, but rather that he is simply not strong enough to do the compressions, that’s what keeping him from being able to do CPR. You’d think an instructor would know what hard work CPR is.

(Oh, geez, I’m having flashbacks to the shock of the neighbors when they saw a hearse parked in our driveway – the one Dad brought home from the ambulance service he worked for so he could fix the radio in it)

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Forgive me but I must nitpick a minor point in the OP. Though those who exhibited juvenile behavior during the childbirth video were definitely guilty of bad judgment in the classroom, it doesn’t necessarily follow that they will act unprofessionally on duty. Two entirely different situations. It’s unfortunate that some (men) are compelled to like asses when placed in a group setting, particularly a classroom setting.

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Two years ago my husband worked with a kid that was training to be an EMT.
What a great kid!
He responded to my sons accident. He was great.
Even though my son looked like hell, Brian chuckled a bit when Josh made him promise not to drop him while moving him from the hospital streatcher to the ambulance one.
He assured him that he had done this a few times with people much bigger than Josh, and the he would be just fine.
Later he explained to us that it just struck him as funny that all the Josh had been through in that first hour and the thing that was on his mind was being dropped while being transfered.
My hubby and I ran into him at the ER once while we were dealing with my youngest sons blood disorder.
Brian was standing out in the hall waiting to hear about a patient he had brought in with chest pains. Said she was a nice older lady that talked about her grandchildren all the way to the hospital.

It takes a special person to do that job. You have to be quick thinking, calm and compassionate. You fit the bill!
Good luck! Let me know when that test comes up so I can send you good wishes, and then congrats when you pass.

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What a week. I’m up at this ungodly hour because I have another 12 hour ride-along shift with the Paramedics sponsoring the course. :smiley: Love it !

I did indeed print the thread, at least the first 8 postings or so, and hand it to the lady who was the instructor that night. She was there last night doing Practicals with us, along with a few other instructors and the Lead Instructor. She said she’s read it, then show it to the Lead person if that was okay with me.

Now, I don’t normally curse that much- we’ll see if these guys even hire me after reading my rant. Oh well- it was an honest response to an awful situation. Can’t get better than that. Everyone’s postings have only served to reinforce my initial feelings.

Hibbins, you’re right- the classroom and the field ARE two different things. The classroom is less stressful. :wink:

Cartooniverse

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Proof read, proof read, proof read. That should be “…compelled to ACT like asses…”.

Apologies.

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“Cartooniverse, you prudish bluenose! Don’t you realize that men have a god-given right to giggle at vaginas?”

(Sorry, I’m just trying to imagine a post that WOULDN’T have agreed with you.)