This one happens after being in the working world for a while.
You realize at some point in the past, you had your last summer. There won’t be another one for 45 years – if you’re lucky.
When I had my first apartment in college, I invited a girl over for dinner. She was not impressed when I found out that you can burn spaghetti.
When I finally bought a bigger pot, she was gone.
I decided as a college student to attempt my first fish fry. Bought some smelt, tossed them in a non stick pan, and started cooking. Oil? What do you need that for?
Turned into a disgusting mess that stank up apartment for a week.
My college roommate taught me a lot about classical music and I taught her how to write a check and how to make a long distance phone call. Her mother had given her a checkbook but no instructions and she never asked.
I found that the legal system is not as simple as seen on tv when I got a DUI at age 18
An [ethnic person of your choice] was suffering from constipation, so his doctor prescribed suppositories. A week later the [ethnic person of your choice] complained to the doctor that he had been taking them each day but they didn’t produce the desired results.
“What?” said the doctor. “Have you been swallowing them!?”
“What do you think I’ve been doing,” the [ethnic person of your choice] said, “shoving them up my ass?”