Hamburger Helper Helping Hand V.S. Arbys Oven Mit. Ultimate Fight!

Who wins this ultimate death match?
The contestants are evenly match: both are the same size, both advertise terrible tasting “food”.
My money is on the helping hand. He can make a fist.

Oh my money is on HHH all the way. He can bitch-slap AOM til the cows come home.

It’ll be close. The Arby Oven Mitt has been working out, as shown in a comercial. He’s pumped for a fight. The Hamburgers Helper mitt, I haven’t seen him in a commercial for years. He’s probaly spent all his spare time on the Lazy Boy drinking beer.

Yet, he has been watching a lot of television. He has seen the AOM slowly but surely take his spotlight, the spotlight that the HH believes is rightfully his own. He has rage built up in him. On the same hand, the AOM feels he needs to make a name for himself.

I’d put my money on the HHH. He has years of experiance under his belt. In a fight this closely match, experiance is what’s going to make the difference.

HHH will win because he has fingers.

He’s back! I’ve seen him in a couple of commercials lately, including one this morning! He’s tanned, rested, and ready!

I forgot to add one other simularity: they’re both annoying as all hell!

The fingers give HH an overwhelming tactical advantage, although AO does appear to have size and weight on his side.

I’m going to say the Hamburger Helper Hand-- if he’s prepared.

I’m gonna have to put my money on the underdog – the AOM has a celebrity voice, which has to count for something.

Put the HH into the AOM and toss them both into a chipper-shredder.

Not only does the AOM have a celebrity voice, it’s the celebrity voice of Tom Arnold, who survived a marriage to Roseanne. AOM has a distinct advantage, I think. Plus AOM doesn’t shill for a company that sells powdered cheese products in boxes.

Sorry, HHH.

My money’s on the HHH. Recall that the oven mitt can’t get up if he falls over, which seems to happen quite often if he doesn’t have something nearby to prop him up. This limits his mobility, and is a critical weakness.

HHH’s fingers allow him to do things the mitt can’t: flick, scurry, climb, use scissors… In any modern kitchen setting, OM is going down.

Plus I have a deep and abiding hatred for the mitt.

Well, AOM seems to be somewhat of a wussy, so I would figure him to run away; and HHH is just so darned friendly, I couldn’t expect him to do much either.

Maybe they could just bore each other to death with repetitive commercials? It is definitely working on me.

Can’t they just both die?

I’d pay to see that.